Sending your unwell wife downstairs

[Navymamma]

I’ve got a nasty, persistent cough. It’s annoying but I’m unwell. DH is getting audibly annoyed because my cough is keeping him awake. He suggested I put on some Vicks or try sleeping upright. I told him there was no point because I know from experience it doesn’t make a difference. He testily said fine then, do nothing. He’s been so passive aggressive about it, so I said, I’ll just go sleep on the sofa then. He pointed out that I wont be comfortable. I said, well of course I wont be comfortable but it’s obvious you’re annoyed about my cough. He said nothing. I’m now on the sofa uncomfortable while he sleeps upstairs.
AIBU to think a man shouldn’t have his unwell wife sleeping on the sofa so that he can sleep uninterrupted?

In our house the coughing person would go downstairs as they'll be up anyway coughing pointless both being tired

I do usually see a GP I’m just not impressed by mine and haven’t yet seen him.

I can’t take codeine and I’m asthmatic, but the GP suggests ibuprofen to reduce inflammation.

He told you not to sleep on the sofa and tried to help by suggesting Vicks. You slept on the sofa anyway and didn’t even try the Vicks. But it’s his fault? 👍

How can you say in one post that you have a chest infection and in another say you've not seen a GP? Where has this diagnosis come from then?

He sent you nowhere. You took yourself downstairs. YABU!

I think you both sound unreasonable, OP, but I'm really only posting because I may have the answer to your cough.

Take an anti-histamine. Piriton if you can: seems to work better than non-drowsy ones. Night Nurse does the trick too — also contains an anti-histamine IIRC. It dries up the mucus that drips down your throat and makes you cough.

Not a doctor but an asthmatic. It is not recommended I take ibuprofen. Maybe get that checked.

I can throughly recommend separate rooms with a very comfortable bed in each. You can pay visits sometimes!

Is this the same poster who was raging that her DH wouldn't go out to find a pharmacy for some Lemsip for her at 11pm?? And then annoyed because she said she didn't want any food and he went to dinner without her 😂

If not OP then I suggest you find that thread and PM the poster - you will definitely have a more sympathetic ear there than you will have here.

And yep, to echo others, don't offer to do something you don't want to do and then whinge about it. "Unwell wife" my arse.

Coughs are really annoying. I sleep downstairs when I have a cough as we have a huge sofa, which is massively comfortable and I can prop loads of cushions around me to sit me up but without feeling like I'm sitting up (if that makes sense) as it really does help. Laying down makes my lungs feel "full".

I often sleep downstairs of DH is snoring as well, I sleep so much better on our sofa hahaha.

Don't ever offer to do something you don't want to do.

I have a chest infection for 4-5 months a couple of years ago. 5 weeks worth of antibiotics during this period, nothing shifted it, I lost my voice twice and was so poorly, myself and DP barely slept in all that time. TMI but my pelvic floor became so weak from all the coughing that I was having to wear tena constantly. Any who, we decided to move the furniture around in our bedroom one day, and directly behind the headboard on my side sofa the bed, very bad mould. How my DP wasn't affected by it at all I've no idea, but less than 2 weeks after taking care of the mould issue, not a cough to be heard.

Maybe check for damp/mould in your home?

YABU for going downstairs. If he didn’t like the cough then HE could leave.

I have had an awful cough for over a week now and it always seems to be worse in the wee small hours. I, however, take every precaution I can. Vicks, lemsip before bed, cough sweets and water beside the bed. My DH is great and refuses to let me go elsewhere to sleep even though he wakes up if I as much as twitch a finger.
You done the right thing OP by going to the sofa and I hope you feel better soon

He didn't ask you to sleep downstairs,you said you would ,and you did ... Lol , hopefully you have woken up and realised,how funny this is.

So you suggested sleeping on the sofa and then got annoyed because he didn’t beg you not to?

Bloody hell, you sound very difficult!

I hope it’s simply because you’re unwell and not a true reflection of your personality.

But you went anyway 🤷🏻‍♀️

Me and my partner sleep downstairs if ill. It's not fair on the other to not be able to sleep and have to go to work.

Would your husband be open to alternating nights on the sofa until your cough has improved?

Can the ibuprofen and talk to a pharmacist.

I had a bad cough and was taking brufen for my knee and pharmacist said to stop as it was likely making it worse. Cough stopped very quickly.

And change your doctor.

Plus a lot of coughing with asthma might indicate your medication needs a review.

Not sure what you thought he could do. Coughs are annoying to others.🤷‍♀️

I don't think either of you would have been at your best in that situation. It's crap being kept awake by coughing and it's even more crap to have the cough. I would have just slept separately in the first place to avoid this very predictable annoyance.

I would have let you get on with being uncomfortable downstairs too.

Sounds like you got your knickers in a right twist.

I’d go and sleep downstairs if i was coughing and wife does the same