To ask neighbour not to smoke in his own garden?

[fope]

We live in a flat in converted townhouse. We are on the second floor. Neighbour is in the garden flat (not shared garden). Our bedroom is at the back of the house.

As it’s getting hotter, we need to have our bedroom window open all night.

Garden flat neighbour is a heavy smoker. He stands in the french doors of his flat and smokes “out” into the garden (if that makes sense).

The problem is, that the smoke rises up and it makes our bedroom stink. Three mornings in a row we have woken up to a bedroom smelling of cigarette smoke.

AIBU to ask him not to smoke in his garden? Or at least go somewhere else where it won’t rise up into other people’s homes. Other people in our building have also commented on this.

It’s ok to be selfish in your own home, it’s what it’s there for.

I understand why your upset - I will be too.

I think the best you can do is ask him to move further away from your window when smoking. Be prepared for him to say no.

Other than that all you can really do is keep your window shut and hope he moves soon.

TinyYellow · Yesterday 11:47
It’s ok to be selfish in your own home, it’s what it’s there for.”

In your home, sure. Not outside blowing shite into next door’s windows. That’s not ok.

I'm not sure about that really. You can be as selfish as you like in regards to garish decorations, what TV you watch, scratching your arse on the sofa and make as many something-phobic comments as you fancy (although not in Scotland!). But, this stops when it affects others. There are rules around lighting bonfires, about attracting rats, about noise and so on. It might be you castle, but that doesn't mean responsibilities to others in proximity end at the front door. I am no expert on this, but some of these responsibilities are in law, others are more moral.

Do all of the people who are so horrified by someone smoking a cigarette in their doorway feel the same about people having barbecues in their back gardens? Smoking a cigarette takes less than ten minutes, while the smell and smoke from a barbecue lasts for very much longer. I find the smoke and smell from neighbours barbecuing their burgers and sausages for an hour or more at a time far more offensive than a cigarette being smoked in a doorway. Also, the smell and smoke from a barbecue travels far further than the smoke from a cigarette.

I hate both tobacco smoke and bbq smoke. Tobacco smoke has the second and third hand detrimental to health effects as well. Editing in to include bonfire smoke as well - horrid.

Presumably though, people don't pop out for 10-20 barbeques a day, 365 days a year. Its usually only a few exceptionally sunny Saturday afternoons a year.

@Everanewbie I don't think the OP was suggesting that her neighbour stood in the doorway of his home 10-20 times every day. Unless it's raining heavily, It is very rare for there to be a Friday, Saturday, Sunday, or bank holiday from may to the end of September where I live when at least one neighbour doesn't light up their barbecue, and it's often the case that several neighbours have one on the same day, and the stench travels over several gardens. I've yet to notice the smell from a cigarette being smoked in a neighbour's garden. In fact, I visited a friend last weekend who is a smoker and we sat outside a couple of times so thst she could have a cigarette and I could barely smell her smoke - there was definitely not a trace of any smell on my clothing when I got home. I hate the revolting smell from barbecues, I have to bring my washing in, and shut all my windows, often for several hours even in the middle of a heatwave - but I accept they have a right to have their barbecues in the same way that a smoker has the right to stand in their own doorway to smoke a cigarette for ten minutes at a time.

I think you might have to move.

I don’t think you can ask him not to smoke but I would say something along the lines of “would it be ok to stand a bit further away from the house when you smoke as it’s rising up into our bedroom when we have to open the window in hot weather. Thank you so much”

Not unreasonable to ask, especially if you have a decent relationship with him. But don’t be too surprised if he refuses to change what he’s doing.
You may have to just live with having your windows closed and buy a fan for warm nights.

Bumping this thread to say that we've had the same issue here. It's infuriating going from living with your windows open and wandering between your house and garden... to sitting with windows closed and hating going out back. All because someone wants a smoker's patio right up against the back of their property.

On principle, I think it's disgusting someone can take control of ventilation to neighbouring properties in this way; for an addiction no less.

We have half a dozen residents either side of said smoker and the smoker themselves is lighting up every 15, 30 or 60 minutes, every day.

The fumes really do seem to skirt outer walls and get delivered to open windows very efficiently. We've found windows closest to their smoking area are a write-off and internal doors have to stay shut to avoid a draught which will literally pull in the cigarette fumes.

I would describe the situation as hell on earth.

Other residents on our street smoke out their frontdoor whilst nextdoor smokes exclusively garden side and if they spot open windows, they hide under the precipice so there's a magical floating cigarette or just turn their back to us.

Seems they don't want the stench in their own home but are fine dumping the problem on neighbours either side.

Definitely so much worse than BBQing or bonfires because the nuisance from smokers is unrelenting as opposed to a few odd days over the summer. I would go knocking to ask what the heck is going on if frequent fumes of any other type where coming from a neighbour's garden in the way they do with cigarettes. But you know what it is and you know it's hopeless.

We've now had several years of keeping tabs on open windows whilst the nextdoor neighbour sits watching television, only to light up out their backdoor at their leisure. Meanwhile here we won't be getting on with anything as we're literally trying to actively let heat out upstairs late in the day between their cigarettes.

I would not wish living next to a smoker on my worst enemy. After years I'm bitter and resentful that one got their mitts on the house nextdoor. Not felt like home since they moved in.

Whatever short-lived high they get comes at our expense... and then they're out getting more.

Local authorities are absolutely useless - smokers are a housing problem but environment health won't do anything, counsellors won't do anything - you're just told it's "reasonable use" and a "civil matter".

I have absolutely no idea how smoking can be lumped in with cooking odours. I've never smelt anything as dire as cigarette fumes whilst someone was cooking.

Would probably sue in private nuisance if it were feasible. It isn't. It's ridiculous anyone can actually dump this problem on neighbours. Smokers should be liable for the cost of AC being fitted in neighbouring homes.

Fresh air out back away from the street should be for everyone, not for one smoker to contaminate with acrid, noxious fumes and then turn their back on, going back in to watch TV.

Never have I been so appalled by a "neighbour", just seems callous, disrespectful, vile, inconsiderate, lazy and selfish.