To ask neighbour not to smoke in his own garden?

[fope]

We live in a flat in converted townhouse. We are on the second floor. Neighbour is in the garden flat (not shared garden). Our bedroom is at the back of the house.

As it’s getting hotter, we need to have our bedroom window open all night.

Garden flat neighbour is a heavy smoker. He stands in the french doors of his flat and smokes “out” into the garden (if that makes sense).

The problem is, that the smoke rises up and it makes our bedroom stink. Three mornings in a row we have woken up to a bedroom smelling of cigarette smoke.

AIBU to ask him not to smoke in his garden? Or at least go somewhere else where it won’t rise up into other people’s homes. Other people in our building have also commented on this.

If he says no and you can’t cope with it, get a fan instead of opening the window. I hate the smell of smoke too and I don’t think you’d be unreasonable to ask but I also don’t think he’s unreasonable to refuse

There's nothing to stop you from asking your neighbour to move to a different part of the garden but I can't imagine he would agree. It's like me asking my neighbours to stop cooking their incredibly pungent food in their kitchen with their back doors open - I can imagine what their response would be. I do think smokers must find it quite difficult nowadays and to have someone complaining about smoking in their own garden is going a bit far in my opinion.

It's like me asking my neighbours to stop cooking their incredibly pungent food in their kitchen with their back doors open

It's actually nothing like this at all.

too much pearl clutching over smoking.

It's not 1950 anymore.

You could ask him, if he’s a decent person he’ll move down the garden a bit - it’s hardly a hardship!

This

I despise smoking but unfortunately he's within his rights to smoke in his garden. Are you on friendly terms with him? If so, maybe you could ask him to smoke elsewhere as it bothers you, but he doesn't have to agree to this.

Oh give over.

Your neighbour is doing nothing wrong by smoking in his own garden.

You would be doing something wrong if you tried to dictate how someone does something completely legal in their own home.

You live in a flat, it is normal to expect to have to put up with other peoples habits when you share a building.

Could you get a fan and point it towards the open window to blow the smoke away?

This is polite and friendly

Worth a try

But, if he refuses, there's nothing more you can do

I sympathise. I'd hate it too

Difficult one. Are you on good terms with him? It might be worth going and speaking to him but saying it in a way that explains you know that this seems a cheeky thing to say and you're very sorry to come across that way but the smoke smell is drifting into your flat and if it wouldn't be too much hassle could he possibly go a bit further up the garden or face a different direction? After all he doesn't smoke in his flat so I guess he knows that's not ideal - just in the spirit of all getting along together would he mind terribly just going a little further up the garden?

We had similar situation a couple of years ago. Our neighbours were smoking all the time and laughed when we asked could they go further down the garden. We didn’t argue - we just decided to let the dc out to play nice and early and had impromptu Bbqs each time they hung washing out, it lasted 2 weeks and they apologised and said they could see our point 😂

Hygienic.
I will never understand people who say this.

At my friend's house we smoke at the bottom of the garden when upstairs has their windows open

Good luck with that!

There are LOADS of "completely legal" things people could do in their own homes but don't because they live in proximity to others. A little give and take is worth considering, rather than just saying "it's legal, so...."

I’d ask him to move away from the building, or go out the front?

Hes allowed to smoke in his own garden. How about a friendly word asking him would he mind smoking away from your wondwo as its xoming into your bedroom

Well I’m an ex smoker so I can see both sides here…l
I now find it very unpleasant but if you are a smoker you are now made to feel like a leper…. And it is his own back garden.
I would ask nicely if there is any way he could smoke further down the garden but as others have said, you may just have to shut your windows and use a fan…

It’s worth asking him to smoke further out in his garden. Most people would understand and accommodate their nice neighbours.

We don't know that for sure.

I smoke and am ashamed of it! I'd be mortified if a neighbour explained that my smoke had been affecting them.

I'd not only find somewhere else to smoke, I'd be apologising profusely.

If you want control of the garden you need to buy/rent the property with the garden.

I’d hate it so I empathise but he is doing nothing wrong. If you don’t like it you have the choice to move or close the window.