Advice - school run sick husband

[Blueberryancakes]

Need some advice please.

I start work at 8am.

Husband works from home so will do the school run just before he starts work.

He’s been sick in the night and feels dreadful. I’ve been up half the night with him. He can’t do the school run.

I’ve got no one to ask to do it.

Im going to have to call my boss and tell him I’ve got to do the school run so won’t be in until 9:30am.

Im panicking I’m going to be in trouble for being late. Can my boss refuse me coming in late?

I had a similar situation recently, dp had vomiting and diarrhoea so I called and said I would be late to work. Manager was shitty with me but then a couple of weeks later took the whole day off because her DS was ill. I can't see the difference to be honest. Family emergencies happen, i think you did the right thing

And for those bringing it up, no I don't have anyone local that can step in and I'm not about to make friends with other parents just so I can use them as ad hoc childcare

Yeah and spread whatever sickness bug he has. Better to stay home.

This is why it's important to make as many friends as possible with other parents at school! doesn't have to be deep friendships - but it's your community.

It's not about making friends 'to use as childcare' - it's about taking advantage of the benefits of local community - that you step into when your child is at a local primary school. You meet nice people, your kids get to hang out with their friends sometimes - and you can help each other out.

I LOVE it when another parent asks me for a favour! I feel so glad they feel they can ask - if I can I help, if I can't Im just pleased they reached out.

I agree, my daughter is 10 and walks home with friends but I wouldn't be keen on her walking alone- there's two big roads and it's fairly quiet past a park so I wouldn't like her to do that herself- and she's very responsible and mature for her age.

I'm glad your boss was ok with it- these things happen sometimes- I ask for a lot of flexibility in work around the kids but I pay it back by always being flexible with them in return.

Just explain you won't be able to come in until 9.30 due to a short term childcare problem. Maybe I've been lucky but I've always found managers to be understanding about this sort of situation. Even male managers without children would always be nice about it so you may be pleasantly surprised at the response. We're not robots, we all need a bit of support & understanding sometimes.

Completely agree.
It’s impossible to drive - and very dangerous while that acutely Ill.
Norovirus ( sounds similar) is not the type of bug one can push on through with.
Carrying a bucket is necessary to even let a dog out in the garden, never mind driving

Plus the horrendous infection risk.

It’s not like having a cold.

@Blueberryancakes I hope your husband feels a little better tomorrow

Oral rehydration salts can help if he is allowed salty/ sweet things.

I can't believe how badly some people are treated at work when I read some posts on here! At my work someone would never be asked to take unpaid time off just to come in an hour or two late because of a family emergency. At a stretch you might make up the time. Guess I'm lucky

I agree and was never penalised for occasionally coming in late or having to leave early because of childcare problems. I always worked in the public sector though and believe that sector may be better about that sort of thing generally speaking.

In your defence, I've done the school run twice when I thought I had the flu.

Then I actually got the flu and realised how different those first two times were.

My worse case of covid affected me far longer than the flu did, but the peak of my flu was worse than the peak of my covid infection.

Why is it man flu as soon as a man has got the flu!? It’s such a stupid response.

This thread is full of people talking about making friends & being part of a school 'community '. Literally the next thread down is about a mum trying to do that described as 'Annoying school mum' and a good potion of posters advising the op to ignore her!. You can't make this shit up!
Hope your Dh feels better soon. It's probably a good idea to arrange something with your work for tomorrow as well

@bloodyplumbing mine are 1 and 3 so the taxi thing is a bit theoretical at the moment. I have a nine year old nephew and I would think it was fine for him to take a short taxi ride alone. Maybe I'll feel different when they are older.

I was a manager for 31 years and always tried to help staff who had child or caring issues at short notice.
It's part of life and being an arse about people having to drop everything at short notice only leads to de motivated staff, It was nice when I retired & all my staff/co workers said I was the most understanding boss they had worked for. It meant more to me than any of the words from the company.
But as others have said, perhaps get more of a backup plan in place for next time.

The bigger issue for me is why she is so scared of her boss that she is panicking to this extent? I will understand if she is always late or something but if she has a true family emergency and yet feels so stressed.

I see her update and seems she over reacted but that’s what jumped out at me not that her husband must be a lazy man pretending to be sick.

Does your 9 year old nephew have a mobile?

@bloodyplumbing he does. I don't think it's connected to the Internet though. I think a lot of 9 year olds walk home from school, if it's a short distance so would likely have some sort of phone to help with that.

I wouldn't allow it, but then my 9 year old did not travel alone or was put without an adult.

Which seems to be the case with OPs DD and therefore it's doubtful they have one, so couldn't take it in a taxi.

In a similar circumstance (one child too sick to leave the house, other child needed to be walked to school) I always messaged one of the two or three parents I see walking past our front door to take their DC to school, and they were always happy to walk the well child up.

I think all the people saying they can get up and do things while they have flu didn't actually have flu.
I am in my late 60s and I have had proper influenza 3 times in my life. The last time was after I had started taking immunosuppressive drugs. I have never felt so ill. My husband had to practically carry me to the loo.
My nephew has had influenza once in his life and almost died from post flu pneumonia.
People do die from proper flu.
It isn't just a really bad cold.

I hope your husband is ok, OP.

Family first.

People have been told this many, many times. That they are dismissing it whether by writing "man flu" or telling how they ran a record breaking marathon time with it, can only mean they are being stupid on purpose.

Life happens, family stuff happens. I’d expect your employer to have a contingency plan for stuff like this.

Can you not read?

Your employer is unreasonable and you shouldn't be afraid to ask for time off for child are. Sure someone on here is in HR can advise. I pretty sure most of us let our employers take us for mugs working all hours, so a little flex goes a long way.