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Original poster

Advice - school run sick husband

251 replies

Blueberryancakes · 14/05/2024 05:32

Need some advice please.

I start work at 8am.

Husband works from home so will do the school run just before he starts work.

He’s been sick in the night and feels dreadful. I’ve been up half the night with him. He can’t do the school run.

I’ve got no one to ask to do it.

Im going to have to call my boss and tell him I’ve got to do the school run so won’t be in until 9:30am.

Im panicking I’m going to be in trouble for being late. Can my boss refuse me coming in late?

OP posts:
Brainded · 14/05/2024 06:11

Just seen that update about your job. Again, not your problem, they need to have processes in place for these incidences.

bluecomputerscreen · 14/05/2024 06:12

do you or your dh are part of a class/pta social media group?
can you ask there if someone is able to take dc as a one off?

I don't think you would be in trouble with the employer if you are up front.

PoppingTomorrow · 14/05/2024 06:15

@Blueberryancakes has your DH temperature been taken? If it's lower than it should be then check 111 or 999 as it could be sepsis and may need an ambulance for urgent medical attention. It can escalate really quickly.

Iizzyb · 14/05/2024 06:15

www.acas.org.uk/time-off-for-dependants

Hi OP everyone who is employed here is allowed up to 5 days' per year for emergencies due

Iizzyb · 14/05/2024 06:18

www.acas.org.uk/time-off-for-dependants

Sorry pressed return too soon! 5 days off for emergencies due to dependants so children, family members who depend on you for care.

Hopefully your boss will understand & you are up & can give colleagues advance notice rather than just not turn up this morning but it is what it is - you need to care for your daughter & get her to school

Cadela · 14/05/2024 06:22

Do you know any of the school parents or have a group chat? I’d take a kid to school if anyone needed it. Would be worth asking.

HeartBlueDay · 14/05/2024 06:23

Have you tried to contact school or any wrap around care school has? I've had helpful responses in an emergency.
Can you take DD to work for 8am, unlock/set up and leave as soon as anyone else turns up to get DD to school?
Is there a local taxi firm - they will have DBS checked drivers who could collect DD from home.
Has DD literally any friend who might be willing for DD to arrive at theirs before 8?
Apologies if none of these thoughts are helpful. I feel for you, good luck and hope DH feels better soon.

fieldsofbutterflies · 14/05/2024 06:24

Honestly, these replies are batshit. My DH was similarly unwell a few weeks ago and there's no way he could have done any kind of school run. He could barely get down the stairs!

OP - I would ask around for any parents to see if they could do the school run this morning, but if not you'll just have to be a bit late to work. It happens!

TinkerTiger · 14/05/2024 06:28

OP: DH lost his legs last night, he's awaiting surgery, no one else can do the school run, what should I do?

MN: why can't he do the school run? He's being a drama queen! Women would do it!!

Jesus.

TinkerTiger · 14/05/2024 06:29

Solasum · 14/05/2024 05:57

If he is that unwell, he needs to spend the day in bed and sleep as much as possible. Not try and work.

The OP has literally said he has called in sick.

5475878237NC · 14/05/2024 06:32

Can you pop to surgery yourself now and get everything set up then come home when the first staff member arrives? Obviously only works if it's really close and someone else will be there at 8am.

PineappleTime · 14/05/2024 06:33

What would he do if you weren't there?
I genuinely don't get this. I've done the school run with flu before as there's been nobody else to do it.

DancefloorAcrobatics · 14/05/2024 06:37

Just call work ASAP and say you'll be in later fue to school run issues.

DH is allowed to be sick and you are allowed reasonable time off for emergency childcare.

inigomontoyahwillcox · 14/05/2024 06:38

www.gov.uk/time-off-for-dependants

Original poster
Blueberryancakes · 14/05/2024 06:39

I’m not part of the mums what’s app groups - I opted out (regretting that at the moment)
iv got one mum I can ask (only number I’ve got) I’ll text her. School breakfast club has to be pre booked - saying it’s fully booked on the app.

My husband is pretty reliable. If he says he’s too unwell then he’s too unwell.

He’s just started taking immunosuppressants - so maybe this has made him feel worse than normal?

OP posts:
21andon · 14/05/2024 06:41

if you have to be late, you have to be late.

Surely you have contact details of a few of dd’s friends’ parents though? I’d be seeing if I could drop her with someone else first & they take her to school if at all possible.

But emergencies happen; this can’t be helped.

widgitfidgit · 14/05/2024 06:41

Blueberryancakes · 14/05/2024 06:39

I’m not part of the mums what’s app groups - I opted out (regretting that at the moment)
iv got one mum I can ask (only number I’ve got) I’ll text her. School breakfast club has to be pre booked - saying it’s fully booked on the app.

My husband is pretty reliable. If he says he’s too unwell then he’s too unwell.

He’s just started taking immunosuppressants - so maybe this has made him feel worse than normal?

Honestly. Join the what's app group. They get a bad rep but in times like this they are invaluable

Katemax82 · 14/05/2024 06:42

PineappleTime · 14/05/2024 06:33

What would he do if you weren't there?
I genuinely don't get this. I've done the school run with flu before as there's been nobody else to do it.

If she wasn't there he still wouldn't be able to do the school run I'm guessing

itsgoingtobeabumpyride · 14/05/2024 06:42

Is school near your work, could you take DD with you so you can do the set up, then pop out to drop her off, at 9 yrs old she could sit in the waiting room

TokyoSushi · 14/05/2024 06:43

How far is the school? If it's really close, could DD walk by herself just for one day? Otherwise, can you ask another Mum? Another option could be to go into work literally now, set up what you need to set up and then nip back to drop off DD. Otherwise if all else fails, as you don't usually do it you'll just have to call in 'late' for one day.

Greyheronsarethebest · 14/05/2024 06:43

bit dramatic your post. Noone will put you in trouble for doing the school run because of an emergency at home. I suggest you educate yourself about your rights. I find your post very odd.

Brainded · 14/05/2024 06:44

Never mind what dh would do if she wasn’t there. What would her work do!!? They will have a contingency plan and if they don’t then they are stupid…not op’s problem at all.

rainydaysaway · 14/05/2024 06:45

These replies are insane. OP just tell your boss you have to do the school run and let them worry about setting up.

I was in a meeting yesterday that was moved twice - first time to accommodate my colleague’s school run and the second time to accommodate mine - it wasn’t an issue (and my boss does not have children but is always mindful of people who do).

AnImaginaryCat · 14/05/2024 06:46

You've no choice but to find out how flexible your boss is. Especially if your own alternative if making a very unwell person do the school run. (Especially if you mean your husband was sick as in vomiting during the night. That would make the school run a nightmare.)

I imagine he will be fine (you boss). He has to be really as its you with the wiggle room here (because you don't regularly do it). Even if he is annoyed by it what can he do? They'll just have to cope for the morning.

Have you never even taken a sick day?

ItsFuckingBoringFeedingEveryoneUntilYouDie · 14/05/2024 06:46

Once again the MN double standard. If this was OP sick in bed, and her H worrying about being late for work, he would be being torn to pieces for not taking the day off to look after her, or at the very least do the school run before leaving for the day.

OP - this is the first time in 9 years. You are clearly a reliable employee. They will manage. Call in asap so they can work out what to do.