Advice - school run sick husband

[Blueberryancakes]

Need some advice please.

I start work at 8am.

Husband works from home so will do the school run just before he starts work.

He’s been sick in the night and feels dreadful. I’ve been up half the night with him. He can’t do the school run.

I’ve got no one to ask to do it.

Im going to have to call my boss and tell him I’ve got to do the school run so won’t be in until 9:30am.

Im panicking I’m going to be in trouble for being late. Can my boss refuse me coming in late?

I wouldn't let my daughter walk to school on her own. Too dodgy an area.

🥇 ⭐️

So much better than others!

Pretty sure flu can impact people differently. Some people it’s horrific and some it’s just a mild cold - but if they were to be tested they’d have the same virus.

Anyway that’s irrelevant. Ops DH is too unwell to do the school run and that’s all that matters.

OP do you have a back up plan for tomorrow? He might not be much better. I’d have no issue having another child dropped at our house at 8am and walking them to school, well as a one off anyway!

@WithACatLikeTread

It is the dismissive you didn't have flu because you could do this or that thinking that annoys me. Pretty sure if it wasn't for the fact that my husband was more ill than me and no family nearby to help that I would have laid down all day. It certainly felt an awful illness but there was no choice.

I haven't said you didn't have flu. I've said that whether due to severity of symptoms or medication, you can't possibly say someone 'can actually' do anything when they have flu.

If someone going through chemo can't physically do something like the school run during treatment due to exhaustion, but someone else going through chemo can do so without too much trouble, would you really say 'you can actually' to the first person? I hope not.

Honestly, just ring your boss. It's not the end of the world, it's family life. I'm sure your boss will be fine and even if they're not, it's tough shite isn't it! You don't have any other choice.

Did you not read the information in the opening post? He's ill.

Why are you assuming this?
He's ill. OP can clearly assess how ill he is and thinks it not wise for him to do the school run.

If you had the flu though, you’d have to go sick. What would work do then? Have you been off sick before?

You were stressed.
Ignore the unkind folk.
Glad you have a plan.
Make sure you know this plan should you need it again.
Sort out a plan for next few days as DH might not get better straight away.
Hope DH feels better soon.

that wasn’t proper flu then if you were able to do the school run.

Flu can be anything from asymptomatic (about a third of cases) to fatal. You can absolutely have mild flu.

But it's really not relevant whether that poster could do the school run. The fact she did it means that she could do it. OP says her husband cannot, and she says he is not one to make a fuss. Not every man is lying in bed making a fuss about nothing. If my DH said he couldn't get out of bed, he would mean it. He's hardly ever ill, and when he is he carries on as if he isn't to the point of being stupid (passed out walking to work one time).

She cannot ask her boss to do the school run, its pretty unprofessional not to mention entitled, grabby and nuts. Plus it will make the boss late?

Give your head a wobble. Some of the comments these days

I don't think that poster meant literally everyone with flu can do these things if they just put a bit of effort in.

She meant it is possible to for a person to have flu and do these things. Not every person with flu, but you can be able to do these things and still have flu.

Sure to God your boss will understand the situation. This isn't a factory in the 1850's. If he's sick he's sick. Why are you this scared of your boss?

Prime example of Mumsnet double standards on this thread.... if the sexes were reversed this thread would be full of sympathy for the poor woman who's been up all night throwing up, with a temperature, chills, shakes ect.

No one would expect HER to take the kid to school in that condition. Seriously some posters ned to take a good look at themselves and see how sexist they've become.

Actually, I think this is one case where there isn’t a double standard. I’ve seen plenty of mum’s post about being incredibly unwell overnight and unable to get their kid to school and asking what to do. The responses are the same; just get a hoodie on, drive them there and don’t get out the car etc. Telling her she needs to suck it up just to get to me to school.

I posted years ago about being very very unwell, and I’m a single parent and had no one else. So my kid’s had take away for 3 days and missed two after school activities, and I was slated. Told it was disgusting that I wasn’t cooking for them and giving them take away for 3 nights running (no one cared that the take aways weren’t greasy shit and were actual proper meals with vegetables and everything).
Women on here can be just as vile to other women when we are seen to “fail” as mums because that’s out job, isn’t it. To be the mum. Vipers nest.

As a widow, there have been times I've had to haul my flu-ridden arse to the school. You just do it...or you can be late. Either way, it's not that much of a dilemma.

But she isn’t alone, they’re partners, they care about each other… a team!?

So nobody has to suffer the school run unwell, they are lucky admittedly, but no martyrdom required in this instance.

Ignore the 'perfect mothers' brigade. Sounds like you did your best - being ill at the moment we'd be eating takeaways for dinner too, if there were decent ones near us!

You must understand that some folk are so ill with flu (or something else) that they physically cannot drag their arse anywhere? They don't have the energy. They are really quite ill.

👏 👏

Exactly!

Don't worry about it. Family comes first.

My husband had to go in late the other day. I am on maternity leave and had norovirus there was no way I could do the school run for my 5 year old. It just wasn't possible. These things happen.

God I can’t believe the people saying man flu and telling him to suck it up. I’ve had stomach flu like that during the night before and honestly couldn’t get out of bed for a few hours in the morning. It’s not like you said he has the sniffles.

Glad you sorted it - in future try and have a bit more confidence in yourself, kindly, I’m not sure why you questioned it this much. You are a parent and if your childcare falls through, kids are sick etc, what else can you do? It’s not like you do it all the time.

Whilst I completely respect you were ill and had no other choice others aren't so lucky. I presume you weren't on immune suppressant drugs whilst you were ill? This guy is.

I'm sorry but it absolutely is a double standard.

Assumptions of man flu, tell him to just get on with it because I could ect are very well and good until you take into account illnesses present differently in different people.

Myself and my 5 year old recently had cryptosporidium.. she was mildy ill for a few days. I was chained to the loo for 10 days. My kids stayed at home because there was no way I could do the school run without shitting myself.

This is sexism. For years women have fought, screamed and protested against sexism... modern society is turning them into what they battled so hard against.

Sexist pigs.

Possibly missing the point here, but how on earth have you got your child almost through primary without needing to take emergency leave before? I’m genuinely in awe of your superior immune systems!

What? Others weren’t so lucky? Did you read my post? I was standing up for OP’s husband. What are you talking about?

Others weren’t so lucky? What the fuck are you talking about?