Advice - school run sick husband

[Blueberryancakes]

Need some advice please.

I start work at 8am.

Husband works from home so will do the school run just before he starts work.

He’s been sick in the night and feels dreadful. I’ve been up half the night with him. He can’t do the school run.

I’ve got no one to ask to do it.

Im going to have to call my boss and tell him I’ve got to do the school run so won’t be in until 9:30am.

Im panicking I’m going to be in trouble for being late. Can my boss refuse me coming in late?

OP what would happen at work if you were ill ?

I think you are entitled to unpaid time off for family emergencies under the dependents leave rules, doesn't have to be just for children, request this from your boss

The options are call your boss and explain and say you will be late in, or take your child in earlier to a breakfast club if the school have one, that way you won’t be as late in. You have no other choices so please dont worry. I hope your boss will be understanding. Juggling everything is so hard x

Wow I’m really surprised by some of the replies on here!

Perhaps you should have said it was you that was poorly and posters would have been more sympathetic.

FWIW I’ve had no choice but to keep my DD off of school when I was too poorly to take her to school.

As you are a 2 parent family then it’s normal for the other parent to do the job, if the other parent is too ill.

It sounds like your DH does the school run on a regular basis and you’ve not needed to phone in to your work before, so I’m not sure why posters are saying things like ‘man flu’ or ‘what would happen if you were ill’ etc.

It drives me mad his blatantly sexist some of the posters are on here.

I'd flu a decade ago and had to go down the stairs on my bottom and crawl back up again.

Sorry but if this is the first time you’ve had to do this and your child is 9 - your partner must feel severely unwell to ask you for the first time in the 5+ years your child has been at school for you to do it instead of him.

All those suggesting he does it are totally out of line. No way.

Your work has to let you take emergency dependant leave, this qualifies.

There are no limits on dependant leave.

https://www.gov.uk/time-off-for-dependants

Family first. Fuck work, theyll cope.

This is not correct - parental leave must be booked in blocks of a week, and you need to give 3 weeks notice.

Emergency leave for dependents is a completely different thing.

I really wish people would refrain from confidently posting like this when they clearly have zero understanding of the subject.

They've made a mistake about the type of leave. Nothing more. Perhaps correct that rather than berating.

https://www.gov.uk/time-off-for-dependants

This is what dependents leave is for. Your boss should have plan b and maybe even c for when things go wrong so if he hasn't, that's his problem to sort.

You've had some shocking replies here! As pp have said, if the roles were reversed they'd be calling him a bastard for even suggesting you could do the run and then flop back in to bed. Similarly some of the mental contortions going on to avoid a once in a blue moon late start.

I'd honestly rejoin the WhatsApp group though as it's handy for stuff like this!

Does the school have a breakfast club you could access ? Take your child in early

I'm actually shocked at posters telling you that your DH should just get out of his sick bed and do the school run.
You've made it clear he is not well enough, he isn't trying to get out of it, and this is the first time since your child has been at school that this has happened.
I can just imagine the replies if you had posted saying you had been up ill during the night, sick, shivering, freezing cold then boiling hot and your DH was telling you to get over it and do the school run.
I'm glad you got it sorted with your boss though

It was this morning and is sorted.

Its mumsnet men are not allowed to be ill or have any feelings or say anything if he dose hes abusive im shocked some times that some posters have men for the way they talk about them.
Some women sound so entitled and cant see it.
We fight for equal rights but some women take it to far.
I bet if it was op that was ill he would be called abusive to even ask her to do the school run.

(I once read a comment on someones thread that said she hated any man that needs to talk to someone or a man that says he needs to talk it was about mental health)

@childlessandfree , as a man on MN, I think it was like that a decade ago. Now I think there is a lot of misogyny (I confess it is odd for me to comment).
There is a persecution of women who do not claim to live upto the Wonder Woman ideal that few can actually live up to. We see on the thread about people who have married into their families, that most MNers are angry at women for not living up to an impossible MN fantasy of how women are.

I'm shocked to not see a

LTB!

Cmon the men haters on MN, this must be worthy of it!

sensible advice 👍

I agree.

Just today I was asked at work am I planning on another baby in the next year because it was quite disruptive to client relations last time.

Good grief!! Some of the replies here are awful! Sounds like the OP has a good understanding of how unwell her husband is and that he can’t do the drop off, but comments about ‘man flu’ and that he can’t possibly be too ill that he can’t drive the children!!!
OP, sounds like you’re a great employee and you don’t like to let the team down, but on this occasion you need to be late. Your boss needs to make allowances for this. Hope your husband feels better soon.

Hi OP. Hope your husband is okay.

I'm not sure what job you do, I haven't read all 10 pages of what seems to be mostly misandrist replies.

I run a huge shop that employs about 300 people. The majority of them are on not that much more than minimum wage.

If someone with what is your clearly exemplary attendance record called in as, due to DH's illness, they needed to start late due to getting their child to school, I would be nothing but sympathetic and be asking if I could do anything to help you, when you got in.

It would be different if this happened twice every week. But your situation has quite obviously been very well managed so please don't worry. Your employer will understand!

@Blueberryancakes how is your DH today? Any improvement?

This is real life, emergencies happen and are catered for. Don't feel bad, you're doing your best in the circumstances and if your boss is human they should be sympathetic and understanding. We've all had situations like this, a flat tyre, sick child, traffic delay or accident, urgent needs etc. Xx

I had a sickness bug a month or so ago, it came on when DD was at school and was in full force by the time i had to pick her up. DH wouldn’t have made it home in time and we have nobody else so I had to do it

Not pleasant but if there was no other option he’d have to, on the flip side you were available and I don’t think the boss would be fair to penalise you for having to take your kids to school. I’d offer to make the time up personally