To be completely shocked about someone I used to know

[EWAB]

When my youngest was at primary school I really liked this woman who had kids either side of mine.

She was in the PTA equivalent and was just a nice woman. There was no drama around her.

I remember having a day off and went into the local cafe, and she invited me to sit with her friends. She was funny, warm and witty.

Significantly, she had friends of all ethnicities and her best friend was Asian.

Everybody will relate to being busy but I think if it was a different time in my life or we had kids in same year we would have been mates.

I am absolutely shocked that she is a member of a right wing political party and has a presence in that party, utterly and completely shocked.

I know it’s not illegal but God.

All three of my siblings are Tories, I’m not someone who thinks everyone has to think like me but I am stunned.

Mumsnet hates this, but I have had a physical reaction to the news. I am just Gobsmacked and weirdly let down and I do know that’s a stupid, irrational thing to say.

Malcom X wasn’t so keen on the liberal white man. In fact he told people to beware of them .

I completely agree with you OP.

I also think most people saying being in a far right party doesn't make you a bad person also has the privilege of not experiencing the far rights hate towards them.

@LakieLady you are spot on.

The party is not banned and stood in yesterday’s elections which is how I found out.

@LakieLady I can understand it making you feel rattled, OP, I bet it's making you doubt your judgment.

This 100% My partner is laughing at me.

This woman was lovely, no drama about her at all. She was open and kind.

I have had a real visceral reaction to this. I’m really upset.

Define ‘far right’ and ‘hate’

What far right party? Is there even any still going?

If someone is a member of a racist, fascist, supremacist organisation like Britain First or the BNP, their political viewpoint absolutely DOES define them as a bad person.

OP are you talking to yourself?

I don’t understand why you are allowing your belief about what her politics mean to outweigh your knowledge about her behaviour.

Wouldn’t you wonder whether you have misunderstood the politics, given that you can see she isn’t racist and is a kind hearted person? Surely her behaviour which you know well is the bigger indication of her attitudes and beliefs?

"Mumsnet hates this, but I have had a physical reaction to the news."

Eh?????

@KreedKafer to be fair OP hasn't stated exactly what party she's referring too.

I also agree I was wrong further up a few times but no one reads past the first page.

Which party, do you mean Reform?

I’ve often observed this point of view and IME, only left-wing people (not all though) think like this.
It’s quite sad, because they become very bitter, and miss out on very good friendships because of this view.

This!!! You are being very unreasonable.

Depends what you mean by a far-right party

The National Front or English Defence League – yes, weird and surprising

@Hugosmaid Britian first /BNP

I try to avoid seeing most of their crap but the constant blaming of every issue in the country on migrants certainly counts as hate.

No that’s not true. My husband and I have very similar views on what outcomes we want for people and how we think other people should be treated. And yet we vote completely differently.

The fundamental difference is we have different ideas about how those things should be achieved. We have different understandings of the motivations behind particular policies from different parties. We also differ slightly on the things we consider most important when voting.

We also both have criticisms of the parties we vote for. Sometimes those criticisms are similar, sometimes they are worlds apart.

Our values are wholly aligned. When you tell other people, “if you vote for A you hate small kittens and want disabled people to die, but if you vote for B you are an incredible, wonderful person” you are simply projecting your own interpretation of their policies and motivations.

It’s a pretty narrow way of thinking.

However, voting for the BNP is pretty clear cut. So it depends on exactly how ‘far right’ you actually mean.

Some parties (EDL, NA etc) have a lot of membership overlap with the likes of Combat-18, Blood & Honour etc who are definitely Nazis.

As a child, I was taught not to bring up money, religion or politics in conversation…

I think that s most people tbh ( well most rational people ) you can be right of centre or left of centre it doesn't make you a bad person
Unless a person's political views are extremist, then I think it's pretty pathetic when people ,who think people who vote differently to them are thick and stupid

I didn't realise being a nice kind person and being in a right wing party were mutually exclusive. You know some people just happen to think those policies are better for the country as a whole, maybe they think voting for left wing policies are devisive and try to bring everyone to the lowest level. I'm always amazed how the kind lefties cannot fathom that someone might have different political views but still be interested in what is best for everyone not just themselves! Her Asian best friend may also vote for the same party (shock horror) for all you know!

If it's the National Front you may have a point but if it's one of those nutty new parties whose names all start with "Re" then, well, they are just a thing now. I detest the lot of them but I equally understand why people, even "nice" people, are turning away from the more established parties.

Me too! Pathetic.

What??

Why is it out of order?

It's so immature to have such a reaction to different political leanings.

u ok hun?