Of course you don’t have to see her! Your maternity leave is for the physical and mental health of you and your baby, it’s not for anyone else . Your MIL has no rights whatsoever here.
Don’t have her to visit at all unless your husband is there, she is is his family not yours. She cannot “ worm her way in “ unless you let her . She cannot crawl through the keyhole and she’s not going to smash down the door or window is she ?
So she can only get in if you are foolish enough to allow her . So let your husband speak to her and arrange visits when he is home.
If she phones you, don’t pick up.
If she texts you, forward it to your husband to deal.
If she arrives at your front door when she is not invited, don’t answer the doorbell.
If she confronts you outside your house, say “ I’m afraid this isn’t a good time Betty as I’m just going out to an appointment, please arrange a time with Dh. Otherwise you will have a wasted journey “.
If she asks you in person “ can I come over next Tuesday , say “ I’m sorry that doesn’t work for me. Why don’t you speak to Dh and arrange a date with him, he will have his diary “.
If she says to your husband “ I phoned @Artmumcreative 47 times this week and she didn’t pick up “ , he needs to say “ she is busy with baby right now, it’s best to call me”.
You do all this very politely and calmly. You don’t need to argue with her or confront her - it won’t work as bullies thrive on fights and arguements and you will never win.
Just drop the rope and keep passing it all back to your husband.
It’s his mother, he needs to deal. I promise you that 99% of MIL problems can be dealt with by this firm, clear and polite approach.
If you had a lovely MIL who treated you with good manners and respect then you wouldn’t have to do this. But you don’t, so you do.
Nasty bullies don’t like other people having boundaries and they will kick back, call you weird or controlling ( yes you have a right to control your own life and your own tiny baby ) . But that’s what happens when you bully others - they either set up very firm boundaries or they go LC or even NC.
Remember @Artmumcreative , the more “ forceful “ she is and the more weak you are - the more you need to hold your boundaries. And no, doing what she wants rather than what’s best for your baby isn’t being “ kind “.
As soon as that baby is born, your first priority needs to be your baby’s welfare - not your making yourself look good to your MIL. You need to put baby first over your own self image and your need to be seen as nice.
Because for most people who say the are “ extremely kind “ - that’s what it’s about . They want to have an image of kindness and goodness - not that they actually want to make the sometimes tough decisions that life requires.
Often the “ kind “ people are the one who want others to do difficult things for them so they don’t have to.
Baby needs your “ kindness “ more than anyone in the world. Yeah I know that’s a hard gig, but it comes with being a mum.
And after baby , you need to be kind to yourself and then your husband . If you don’t start the way you mean to go on, this woman will make your life a misery. You will be on here in a few months complaining that she is running your maternity leave and precious time with your baby. And you and your Husband will be constantly fighting over her.
So put on your big girl pants now - you have many years of parenting ahead of you.