To think there's never an excuse for not offering to take your shoes off in someone's home?

[CheerUpFFS]

If you're a guest ( not working, I.e in a profession where you go into someone's house ) aibu to think there is never, ever an excuse to not at least offer to take your shoes off in someone's home? My mind is always blown when someone comes to mine and leaves them on,

Yabu - I keep my shoes on
Yanbu - I take them off

So you know you're OTT then?

I think I'd even feel self-conscious about my clothes in your house and not want to sit down.

I've got long curly hair too - what if I shed one 😱?

I do offer to take my shoes off if there's a pile of them at the door, but I really don't think we'd get along op. I feel tense just reading your posts.

This.

If there's carpets, and a pile of shoes, I'd take the initiative.

However, not every brain works the same way. If you want guests to remove their shoes, ask them!

I am yes it's my thing and I love cleaning but I'm not asking for much just basic manners, I wouldn't ever cast judgement on someone else's cleanliness in their home and wouldn't expect to be jidged for my standards either just that they're respected if you're coming to visit.

No, I'd find it really rude and offensive. None of my friends would be so rude either as to insist I take my shoes off. One friend moved house recently and has everything new. She invited me to take my shoes off for comfort, not to protect her floors.

I have a friend who throws a couple of lavish dinners parties every year. Guests arrive all dressed up, only to be instructed to remove their shoes to walk on wood flooring.

I think it depends on whether you have hard flooring or carpet. While growing up we had light coloured carpets which would've got filthy from people continually walking in wearing wet shoes. Some garden paths are a bit on the muddy side too in winter.

I find it very rude if someone would come into my house with shoes on. My kids know that too when entering other's houses. Dog crap, spit and dirt would not always come out of my carpet where kids are playing on the floor.

So do you provide orthotic-suitable slippers and somewhere to sit and change for any visitors who can't go around without supports?

This irks me too. Why ask me if you’re going to do what you want anyway? I think that is more rude tbh than not offering to take them off.

I tell people to please keep their shoes on unless they are going upstairs on carpet and the only people who go upstairs are those usually staying with us.

Wet leaves smushed in the carpet aren't great either. Using a doormat doesn't get all the bits of dirt out from between the tread either.

Maybe people don't want to walk in their bare feet over somewhere all your pets have been?

I have three cats and they shed big-time!!!

I've never been asked to take my shoes off and I've never asked or expected anyone who comes into mine
I am disabled and unable to bend and remove shoes and am unable to walk barefoot so I simply wouldn't visit!
I have LVT flooring in my flat which is bomb proof. Just needs a wipe over if it's dirty

Surely this post is a wind up. OP is loving it 🥴🤣🎣

I am loving it haha but it's not a wind up I naively thought people would agree with me😂I don't mind the different answers though lol

Same here, I'd think "fuck you then" and do a U-turn at the door if I saw that mat.

I agree when they just start to crawl as it often coincides with putting toys in their mouths too. However it’s just too much hassle to keep taking shoes on and off once that phase is over. And kids sit on the grass in the summer at the park but don’t change their clothes, whereas at least one wipes one’s feet at the door

I've never lived in a shoes-off home, and it's not the norm where I live.

In saying that, I try to take my cue from the host when I arrive at a home I've not visited before... looking to see if there is a shoe store inside the door, or if they are wearing slippers or socks. If I see evidence, I ask if I should remove my shoes but wouldn't ask otherwise.

The fact that your home is 'spotless' is def not a shoes-off clue 😂. Lots of people are extremely house proud with spotless homes and also wear shoes indoors.

And, I def wouldn't go ahead and just take my shoes off without checking. Because if it's not a shoes-off home, it would be very rude to remove your shoes.

I also find hosts' responses can be confusing. Even if it's clear that the family don't wear shoes indoors, they sometimes brush off my suggestion to take off my shoes too. I usually take them off anyway based on cues, but feel a big awkward about it. Would prefer a host to be clear about it.

I take mine off if asked but I HATE doing it. My feet are always freezing and I just feel uncomfortable.

I have 3 dogs and I don't take their paws off when they come into my house so I don't expect people to take their shoes off. If they want to that's fine too. I have a hoover and a carpet shampooer (for my cream coloured carpets) for a reason.

If I'm asked to at someone else's house I would without question but I'd at least hope for some little slippers to wear so I don't get cold feet.

A lot of people on this thread live in a different world to us. We’re farmers and no-one ever takes their boots off before coming into the working kitchen. We’d be forever taking boots off and on! We have a working kitchen and the rest of the house. No boots or shoes in the rest of the house for family, guests I would never ask to remove shoes, that’s just a step too far 😂

Seriously, I wouldn’t ask a guest to remove shoes in our ‘clean’ areas.

I often read on here of people changing clothes when they get home after being on the tube etc which makes me wonder are people afraid of germs? I personally couldn’t live like that. We live in a home, not in a clinically controlled environment.

Edited to add we have dogs and often lambs in the kitchen…

Yeah, I'd definitely be polite and respect your home.

I put a lint roller in my bag today because my cat always rubs up against my black trousers right before I leave the house and I was visiting a friend.

Same. I even have to take a pair of Heat Holders to the local soft play, which doesn’t allow any shoes on past the main entrance.

@CheerUpFFS the lines I've hoovered into my carpet

I've got to admit I was with you OP until I saw this.

I'm all for respecting house rules, but this is so all about your comfort about the way you feel about the way your house LOOKS , rather than the comfort of your guests.

I've got to say I wouldn't feel comfortable about visiting you 😬

I'm so glad that I don't need to visit your home @CheerUpFFS . I'd torn into Hyacinth Bucket's friend and be terrified. Even HB didn't have patterns hoovered into her carpet. So in addition to worrying about spilling my tea, I'd be worrying about standing on one of the carpet lined and flattering it!
As host, it's your job to make your guests feel comfortable in your house. It's not their job to ensure that you do.

I have some "shoes off inside" friends, and I'll offer to take my shoes off in their homes, but most of my friends and family have pets and hard floors so I keep my shoes on mostly - I don't want pet germs on my socks, hard floors are wipe clean.
I have pets too, and very occasionally someone will ask if they should take their shoes off, I always laugh and say "no, we have pets so the floor is being cleaned every day anyway, keep your shoes on and protect your socks from the pet germs"