To think there's never an excuse for not offering to take your shoes off in someone's home?

[CheerUpFFS]

If you're a guest ( not working, I.e in a profession where you go into someone's house ) aibu to think there is never, ever an excuse to not at least offer to take your shoes off in someone's home? My mind is always blown when someone comes to mine and leaves them on,

Yabu - I keep my shoes on
Yanbu - I take them off

My very large family are in the north and it is unusual to take your shoes off there. No idea if it’s area based or just coincidence!

Coincidence.
I'm in Yorkshire and everyone takes their shoes off round here, and DH's family in Northumberland all remove shoes as well.

In response to the snobby remarks about people who do take their shoes off, the only houses I have been to where people don't remove their shoes haven't been very clean.

@RampantIvy it is my (anecdotal) experience that the posher the person, the more they are shoes on.

(I’m fairly relaxed but like muddy shoes off and shoes off upstairs as we have inherited cream carpets.)

@redfacebigdisgrace We inherited a light carpet in our living room.

Although I am standing up for the shoes off side, I am actually quite relaxed about it, but people just generally take their shoes off anyway, but I would never ask anyone to remove theirs.

I'm clearly not posh

My mate throws posh dinner parties and makes everyone take their shoes off. Or at least she used to until she moved to a genuinely posh area and made posh friends. She’s all about keeping up with the Joneses.

Probably true - my ILs are posh and live in the country, have dogs and their house isn’t pristine. It’s very welcoming and relaxed though- they are great hosts.

@PotatoPudding 😂

How do the strict shoe off people manage with parties? Or more formal things?

We don't have parties or formally entertain.

Of course I offer to take mine off but I absolutely hate this trend and it didn't exist when I was a child 30 years ago. I was in and out of humble and grand homes, never shoeless m

YANBU.
But nobody is coming in my house unless they take them off, if you insist on keeping them on you can have the blue booties.

I always assume the rich people dont do the cleaning and can afford to replace carpets regularly and dont have sheet vinyl which dents with heels.

We have hard floors so im not fussed about shoes on/off downstairs, but i would prefer shoes off if someone went upstairs on the carpets.

Get some disposable guest slippers @CheerUpFFS and keep them in the hall so you can offer them to people, if you ever have people over. I think it’s rude of you to pronounce it to be basic manners when it’s clearly not basic manners everywhere.

I work in a job that involves going into peoples homes. Sometimes I offer to take my shoes off, if they are wet/muddy, sometimes I just slip them off and other times I wipe my feet on the way out !
I wouldn't expect people to remove their shoes if they came to my house, unless they were caked in mud, it just isn't something that particularly bothers me, and certainly not from a hygiene point of view.

Depends where you’re coming in my house. Guests often go to take their shoes off, but if you are in any of the “day rooms” -sitting room, office or kitchen Im in and out all day in wellies and the dogs have free run so shoes on please!

I can't believe the responses on the first page, 100% need to take off or offer! I don't allow shoes on in my house, I ask if they don't do it themselves. I think carpet vs hard floors are a little different though, hard floors not so bad with shoes on

Nope, I don't and I wouldn't expect anyone to in my house either, none of my family or friends do this.

I always take my shoes off when entering anyones house
For those of you who dont and have babies in the house, does it not concern you that some bird / dog poo can be on your carpet ?

I don’t have carpet on the ground floor and when carpet is involved, (upstairs floors) people have to take off their shoes. I actually really detest carpet. I hate cleaning it and having to vacuum twice a week and having to also have a carpet cleaner. I grew up with wood floors and I miss the coolness and the ease to clean. Before someone mentions how cold it gets here in the UK, I grew up in a way colder place.

This is the type of post that makes me think people live in their own little bubbles on here. They never think there’s a whole big world out there where others actually do things differently. Here you are on a public forum calling everyone else rude because they don’t take their shoes off going into other homes and shock horror some people actually allow outdoor shoes to be worn inside so they must be rude too in your world.

If you find it so rude to walk on carpets I can’t help but wonder how the hell you manage in carpeted pubic areas?

Here you are on a public forum calling everyone else rude because they don’t take their shoes off going into other homes

Yet, others think it is rude to be asked to remove their shoes.
This thread and all other shoes on/shoes off thread is going round in circles.

I always take soft comfy indoor shoes/slippers with a proper sole when I visit others' homes. For my own comfort and safety (some people have wooden floors/stairs which I find almost lethal if I'm just in socks). I like to keep outdoor shoes off people's lovely clean floors/carpets. 🌹

So do I. My slippers have arch support, which I need. My local friends always bring their slippers with them when they visit.

There have been times I’ve had holes in my socks so wanted to keep shoes on.

We had a relative very much like the OP who has passed now

But she was similar in that the house looked like a show home, everything was perfect and as soon as you stood up (obviously without your shoes on) she would be right behind you fluffing the cushions

Do you know what eventually happened? People rarely went to visit her as everyone felt on edge as soon as you entered and while you were there as it felt you were being judged just by being there and ruining the perfect aesthetic. It was always a very uncomfortable visit, never welcoming

People rarely went to visit her as everyone felt on edge as soon as you entered and while you were there as it felt you were being judged just by being there and ruining the perfect aesthetic. It was always a very uncomfortable visit, never welcoming

Exactly. When your carpets' hoover stripes are more important to you then your guests' comfort, you'll soon be enjoying those stripes alone.

I was brought up taking shoes off so that's my norm. I take my shoes off when I visit friends to be respectful. I'm showing that I think your house is clean and I want to keep it that way for you. I don't run in circles with people owning Manor houses where that would be odd.