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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Would this upset you or am I being silly?

183 replies

ChangeyMacChangeName · 22/04/2024 13:13

Whilst cooking dinner I told my aunt a cooking tip. Perhaps everyone knows about it, and it seriously is a tiny thing, but something that works well in a recipe. I'm probably the last to know!

My husband leaned over and smirked at my aunty and uncle and said "for my next tip, I'll be teaching you all to suck eggs".

Everyone thought it was hilarious and laughed loudly.

I know its a just little thing but I felt upset and stupid. Face went red and hot. My husband said there's nothing wrong work what he said.

Am I overreacting? I can laugh at myself normally and do. I dont know why this upset me, DH doesnt normally poke fun at me in front of others - which is what it felt like. I'm being silly right?

OP posts:
pongy · 22/04/2024 13:15

What was the tip?! I think it was a bit mean of your DH but he might have been trying to rescue a situation where you seemed to be patronising his aunt. All depends on his tone of voice, and his aunt’s reaction to what you said.

HelloWorld68 · 22/04/2024 13:16

I also want to know what the tip was. Although admittedly was a bit mean of your husband.

RichardsGear · 22/04/2024 13:17

Yes, you're being silly. You've told him you didn't like it; he doesn't think it was a big deal. Just forget about it.

Stripeysocks1981 · 22/04/2024 13:17

pongy · 22/04/2024 13:15

What was the tip?! I think it was a bit mean of your DH but he might have been trying to rescue a situation where you seemed to be patronising his aunt. All depends on his tone of voice, and his aunt’s reaction to what you said.

Yeah I agree with this.

TheChosenTwo · 22/04/2024 13:19

I’m not the right person to ask, me and dh regularly take the piss out of each other in front of other people, no harm intended, just being silly.
I think you’re being incredibly over sensitive but that’s because we operate a high level of ridiculous banter in our house and it’s what we’re used to!

WallaceinAnderland · 22/04/2024 13:19

We have to know the tip OP

Maddy70 · 22/04/2024 13:19

It's a throwaway comment I wouldn't have been upset by that

nervousweddingguest · 22/04/2024 13:21

RichardsGear · 22/04/2024 13:17

Yes, you're being silly. You've told him you didn't like it; he doesn't think it was a big deal. Just forget about it.

oh but this is Mums Net... what has to happen now is the 'leave him' brigade have to turn up and begin the witch hunt! by the end of this post the OP should be divorced and living in a comune for singel abused wome!

if i got upset about every jokey or negative comment my other half made about me.. i'd be in a loony bin by now.

i think i must be the only person that has only just learned the tecnique to open an oxo cube.. but i still tell everyone and his dog about it.. cos its new to me

Janpoppy · 22/04/2024 13:23

He was mocking you, specifically your intelligence. That is embarrassing. And it feels humiliating when your partner undermines you in front of others and gains a cheap laugh at your expense.

The fact he's not interested at all in how you feel about it, and feels entitled to decree that he did nothing wrong says he probably enjoyed putting you in your place.

YaWeeFurryBastard · 22/04/2024 13:23

It depends on how the conversation went. If aunt said “oh that smells delicious” and you replied “thanks I use chilli as a secret ingredient” then your husband was being weird and unreasonable.

However I have a family member who’s convinced her cooking is superior to the rest of us and is constantly trying to “explain” things which we don’t need or want explaining, e.g. “you need to scramble the eggs slowly with a dash of milk to get them just right”, inserted into the middle of a completely different conversation. It’s really grating.

Agree we need to know what was said before commenting.

KreedKafer · 22/04/2024 13:24

This just sounds like normal joking around with family to me. If that was me and my DP, I’d have said “Yeah, all right, Know-it-all” and we’d have been laughing. I certainly wouldn’t have been upset and I probably wouldn’t have given it a second thought.

But obviously only you know what the usual dynamic/atmosphere/tone is in your family and whether this was unusual. We’re all different.

MILTOBE · 22/04/2024 13:24

Yes, it does depend on what you said.

pensione · 22/04/2024 13:25

He was an absolute cunt.

Let me guess, you do all the cooking, OP?

Please stop cooking for the twat.

Axx · 22/04/2024 13:25

Was it chocolate in chilli?

Your DH was being a dick but as a one off I'd just laugh it off

thanKyouaIMee · 22/04/2024 13:25

Janpoppy · 22/04/2024 13:23

He was mocking you, specifically your intelligence. That is embarrassing. And it feels humiliating when your partner undermines you in front of others and gains a cheap laugh at your expense.

The fact he's not interested at all in how you feel about it, and feels entitled to decree that he did nothing wrong says he probably enjoyed putting you in your place.

This is the harshest take of the situation I've ever seen 😂

Surely it depends on the tip? If your aunt asked for the tip? How your aunt reacted? So many dependancies! On the face of it, he made a joke that people enjoyed. It doesn't sound sinister from just what you've said so far.

MissUltraViolet · 22/04/2024 13:26

It really depends on what you said and how you said it. Perhaps he picked up on something from your Aunt and tried to divert the attention, although if so he did it in a stupid way. Men can be stupid sometimes.

nervousweddingguest · 22/04/2024 13:26

Janpoppy · 22/04/2024 13:23

He was mocking you, specifically your intelligence. That is embarrassing. And it feels humiliating when your partner undermines you in front of others and gains a cheap laugh at your expense.

The fact he's not interested at all in how you feel about it, and feels entitled to decree that he did nothing wrong says he probably enjoyed putting you in your place.

oh good lord!

Dartmoorcheffy · 22/04/2024 13:27

It sounds like normal banter and pisstaking a bit. I wouldn't have been in the least upset and would have just laughed back and told him to piss off.

EatCrow · 22/04/2024 13:27

thanKyouaIMee · 22/04/2024 13:25

This is the harshest take of the situation I've ever seen 😂

Surely it depends on the tip? If your aunt asked for the tip? How your aunt reacted? So many dependancies! On the face of it, he made a joke that people enjoyed. It doesn't sound sinister from just what you've said so far.

Show quote history

Oh, I don’t know……this one came afterwards:

“He was an absolute cunt.

Let me guess, you do all the cooking, OP?

Please stop cooking for the twat”.

Usernamesarenoteasy · 22/04/2024 13:27

i think i must be the only person that has only just learned the tecnique to open an oxo cube.. but i still tell everyone and his dog about it.. cos its new to me

@nervousweddingguest

I don't know how to open an Oxo cube, what is the tip?

No, seriously, I don't know how to open an oxo cube....

purplecorkheart · 22/04/2024 13:28

Kind of depends on the tip and how your aunt took your advice. If she felt patronized and your husband noticed he could have badly tried to cover up the hit. Or else he could just be unkind.

CheeryPye · 22/04/2024 13:29

Janpoppy · 22/04/2024 13:23

He was mocking you, specifically your intelligence. That is embarrassing. And it feels humiliating when your partner undermines you in front of others and gains a cheap laugh at your expense.

The fact he's not interested at all in how you feel about it, and feels entitled to decree that he did nothing wrong says he probably enjoyed putting you in your place.

Not everyone has deep underlying emotional issues with men thankfully.

Dartmoorcheffy · 22/04/2024 13:29

The oxo cube opening is to squish it while it is still in the wrapper and it crumbles up ready to use

Original poster
ChangeyMacChangeName · 22/04/2024 13:29

It was literally such a simple thing, adding Greek yoghurt to flour to make flatbreads. I'm sure the world knows but I didn't.

He said it in a jokey voice and my uncle and aunt both laughed.

OP posts:
nervousweddingguest · 22/04/2024 13:29

Usernamesarenoteasy · 22/04/2024 13:27

i think i must be the only person that has only just learned the tecnique to open an oxo cube.. but i still tell everyone and his dog about it.. cos its new to me

@nervousweddingguest

I don't know how to open an Oxo cube, what is the tip?

No, seriously, I don't know how to open an oxo cube....

well.. what you do is, you open the folded over flaps at each end..

you than place the cube on the counter top...

and you squash it.. and hey presto its open! its amazing, its actually life changing for me!!

searh on tictok or insta or whatever for how to open an oxo cube!!

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