Would this upset you or am I being silly?

[ChangeyMacChangeName]

Whilst cooking dinner I told my aunt a cooking tip. Perhaps everyone knows about it, and it seriously is a tiny thing, but something that works well in a recipe. I'm probably the last to know!

My husband leaned over and smirked at my aunty and uncle and said "for my next tip, I'll be teaching you all to suck eggs".

Everyone thought it was hilarious and laughed loudly.

I know its a just little thing but I felt upset and stupid. Face went red and hot. My husband said there's nothing wrong work what he said.

Am I overreacting? I can laugh at myself normally and do. I dont know why this upset me, DH doesnt normally poke fun at me in front of others - which is what it felt like. I'm being silly right?

Same here.

Unless the auntie was Greek of course . . . .

My husband said there's nothing wrong work what he said.

I had a situation with dh recently. I made what I thought was a throwaway factual comment. For some reason dh really took offence to it and I could see that he was put out. I didn’t mean to upset him but it clearly did so I bloody well apologised for being a twat and told him that I’d think before I spoke in the future. Technically there was nothing wrong with what I said, but it bothered my dh so that’s enough for me to know that I shouldn’t have said it. Don’t ignore your feelings here. If something doesn’t feel right about this then it likely isn’t.

Sometimes people think up a little joke in their head and when it comes out their mouth, it’s much harsher and mean. I’ve done this and so has my husband. I bet he realised it sounded cruel …as you have said, it’s out of character. I would be honest and say, I found it humiliating. He needs to hear that you were upset.

It’s a little demeaning but an attempt at a joke. Not my humour but I doubt malice was meant!

This is exactly what I was thinking. I've laughed at someone's poor attempt at a joke before, just to be polite.

OP I've also found myself blushing very occasionally, when I had absolutely no reason to feel embarrassed. Very perplexing, I'm normally fairly confident! But when I feel that hot red flush happening it makes me feel so weird that it gets worse!

Same here.

I have on a couple of accessions apologised for something I've said and admitted "That sounded different in my head. I really didn't mean it the way it came out."

I wouldn't have taken offence at this, I would probably have laughed and whacked him with a tea towel or wooden spoon for being cheeky 😂 it sounds like fairly normal taking the piss out of each other that couples do? I think you're maybe being a bit oversensitive 🤷‍♀️

He was just acting like he thought he was funny and probably just came out of his mouth but you should have said well I will shove an egg up your ass if you make any more silly comments.

I'd have laughed it off & said something like ok master chef 🤦‍♀️😂

I think you've been a bit overly sensitive, sorry OP. It was a joke with family, after all. May have been a bit different if in front of a big group of colleagues or similar? I'd expect him to be more aware of it in the future though, and try and reduce jokes of that nature, now that he knows.

Btw I'd never heard about the Greek yogurt either!

@ChangeyMacChangeName did your husband know that tip himself? Does he cook a lot? Sounds like a mean comment to get a laugh at your expense.

Well, I didn't know it. Is it just those two mixed together?

I also rather doubt that your DH knew it, so he was being a dick.

No you're not being silly.

What your DH said was actually quite insulting and misogynistic.

My DH can get it wrong a lot, but he would never take that tone.

yogurt and flour for flatbreads isn't a "grandmother suck eggs" thing unless you are from a family that makes their own flatbreads every day.

I'd be tempted to be tit for tat though - when he comments on the weather say "and in other news a cat ran up a tree" and if he looks at you say "what? It is funny"

That's new to me I wouldn't have known
I would start addressing him as ..Oh wise one ,fount of knowledge etc
Take the piss out of him.

Oxo cubes never used to be sealed to do that though. You had to crumble it.

OP I think you're being over sensitive. I bet your husband didn't know that, it was a shit joke at your expense.

I would have wound up the tea towel and whipped him with it.

What a jerk. Ugh. Sounds like he disrupted the usual vibe in order to undermine you and make himself look amusing/superior.

He has lost something by doing this. Some trust, your trust in him to not be a dick, to be on your side, to tease you sometimes in a way that isn’t asserting dominance.

I only found this out quite recently on TikTok, OP. It’s a good tip and I would hate it if someone tried to humiliate me like that in front of people. If it makes me miserable or uptight according to some, then so be it. I can see why you’re upset. It was as If he was trying to say ‘’Haha, listen to what an idiot my wife is, she thinks she’s so clever’’ I’d definitely have strong words. What’s his humour normally like?

He was being mean, especially in that context.

I only recently learned about that @ChangeyMacChangeName maybe 2 or so months ago. I'm sure many people don't know.

I didn’t. Is the aunt a culinary genius? Otherwise it sounds like dh joking. I am usually robust and we are a very piss-taking family - but sometimes a comment just gets me. Usually because I have other stuff going on. I let them know they need to read the room but we usually manage to move on.

Don’t apologise & assume everyone else knows though.

i didn’t know the oxo cube one mentioned either - so thank you to pp.

Is your husband frequently like this?

yikes.

now this poster is demonstrating what is a total overreaction.

@ChangeyMacChangeName

I didn't know that either and would have been grateful to be told.

Me neither, so I'm noting that.

I read that adding full fat plain yoghurt to scone mix makes them lovely and moist. I don't bake any more though, because I'll eat everything in one session... 🌹

I cant believe the amount of comments telling you you're being silly. You're not- your DH set out to deliberately undermine you. All these pp's saying "we have a very piss-takey relationship" or "it's normal banter"- that's how abusive relationships start- every relationship i've seen where the couple behave like this has turned nasty very quickly. And women who "counter-banter/back-banter" are regarded as "easy", "common" and very lowly by men.

My ex husband used to take delight from making me feel stupid in front of other people especially strangers. He did it in front of friends and family too. I got ,that I just ignored it. It's only one of many reasons he is my EX.