AIBU to feel irritated by DH asking me to cover up when I don't want sex?

[RaspberryRippleDuvet]

There are times of the month when I really don't want sex but my DH will still be really horny.

At these times he will tell me not to sit in a certain way that shows my curves, or he'll cover my legs with a blanket if I'm showing any part of them. When I seem irritated by this he says he finds it too hard to see me in any way he deems sexy as he knows he won't be having sex with me.

To be clear, I'm not attempting to 'tease' him in any way; I'm just going about my life.

AIBU to find this behaviour of his annoying and controlling? Or should I be more sensitive?

dude needs therapy or some such. what a sad catch!
is he donald trump?

i also suspect this post is a guy. fishing.

My expression while reading this was aghast!

Is he serious? Tell him to fuck off. His lack of self control IS NOT your fucking problem.

We don't live in Iran, fuck me!!!! Seriously vile behaviour.

I hope you are furious op!

Is he 15 and still looking at the lingerie section in Kays catalogue?

No?

He's a pervy sex pest and one day you'll see the light but don't leave it too long.

Yes, exactly.

I'm also suspicious.

@RaspberryRippleDuvet ask him to cover up at all times.. and you will let him know when it’s acceptable and desirable for him to uncover.

im thinking a full on sheet over him for him. Flannel. Itchy flannel. Slightly musty.

Have you told him what a cringey rage inducing ick factor he is? His behaviour would make my vagina clamp shut permanently.

He sounds like an overgrown teenager

There is absolutely never an abused woman who posts on MN about the indescribably vile men they live with and doesn't add 'they are a wonderful husband/father'

Honestly the Taliban called, they want their man back.

The terrible thing is the Afghan women have no choice and have to suffer under oppression. You do have a choice and yet here you are.

Oh yeah, actually probably this. Does sound like a porn addled version of domestic life.

Exactly my thoughts!

Forgot that I have very dry skin so every night i strip off naked and partner puts E45 all over my body he knows that dont mean i want sex every night but would never dream of telling me to cover up, sorry sounds very pervy to me.

Why do posters tell us their partners' issues, which are usually enough for the ick , then follow up with 'he is usually wonderful'?
No he isn't. He is a prick.

I assume he has two hands.🍆👋

This, all the way!

WTF?!
No, that's ridiculous.
Love mine lots but can still be irritating sometimes when wants it when I don't.
This, though?! Whole new level!
He doesn't get to tell you how to sit, or to cover up, I couldn't stand for that!
His problem not yours.

Yeah, this as well.
Just nope.

He sounds like the Taliban, wanting women to cover up so they don't corrupt men.

Tell him to cover his face because you don’t want to look at him anymore…

I was wondering the same - it’s very abnormal and worrying and a definite therapy situation.

If he is being genuine, OP isn’t the only person in the world he’s attracted to (whatever he says) and he’s running deep seated impulse control issues.

Or he’s being a coercive controlling misogynist.

Either is deeply disturbing.

I also wonder if OP is being gaslit as seems to be a classic “he’s wonderful but for this one thing…” (that but for the love bombing etc would set off alarm bells and a string of bright red flags high in the wind).

OP hasn’t been been yet… hopefully will come back and engage.

Thank you for the replies everyone.

We've been married 25 years. Sex has always been the only problem in our relationship because he has a much higher sex drive than me. I was abused as a child by a family member so I have some issues around sex which hasn't always been easy for him.

He doesn't cover me up in a nasty way, or get violent or anything, he just makes comments such as "Are you sitting like that on purpose?".

We have to sleep in separate beds because he was always touching me in his sleep which I hated. He said he didn't know he was doing it but I still don't know if that's true really.

He is very very protective of me, his worst fear is losing me. We have a tracker app so he always knows where I am, and once he left a recording device in our living room because he was worried I was cheating on him. I have NEVER cheated on him. This was years ago though and he confessed he'd done it, I had no idea.

If we don't have sex for a while he gets very anxious and panicky. He starts thinking I'm cheating.

I'll be honest, when he's like this I feel like a trapped animal. I just want to run away and have my body left alone.

But in every other way he really IS a wonderful husband. I know that sounds trite but he really is. I love him.

Blimey! 😳

None of this is normal. It's quite disturbing to me.

Tracking your movements and spying on you is creepy beyond words. He sounds dangerous.

Don’t tar us all with the same brush - that’s like me despising all women because my ex cheated on me (which I don’t).

There’s some seriously creepy guys out there, but the majority of us are perfectly normal and can deal with our ‘urges’ without this nonsense.

@Deathbyfluffy meh, I'm tired of pretending behaviour like this is from a tiny, insignificant number of men - it isn't!