He wants me to transfer the money. AIBU to be put off now?

[whatasneezeyone]

Had a date. Went for sushi 🍣

I got a few dishes and he seemed to be counting his coming through. I got some strawberry cheesecake mochi and he said 'that looks nice. I'll try it maybe one time. Spend enough today ahahaa'

Went to tap the card as we agreed to split the bill

I did my half and my card got declined. I said to the waiter, quick as a flash, I'll need to insert my pin because I've probably tapped too many times now

The man I was with on the date said 'let me just get this, please'

And he tapped.

He's now messaging this evening saying 'can you transfer your half? As we did agree to go half. It's Santander xxx yyy lll'

The followed up straight away with a link and saying 'fancy this next week?'

So I have. And haven't replied back to say it's done

AIBU to not be interested now? Just seems a bit petty.

I personally would've just left it if the shoe was on the other foot

Stop being daft. Read the whole thread. She has paid and isn't whining.

calling someone a princess is immature.

edited for typo.

Sounds like maybe sushi was a bit out of his price range? (It IS a rather expensive way of buying not much food!) And there's no need to twist the fact that he rescued you from an embarrassing situation into some kind of 'disrespect'.

That’s a lomit for an individual transaction., exactly what I said. Not how often you can tap.

again, unless you can evidence you saying there is a limit to how many times you can tap I stand by there is not. There is only the 100 on each tap.

And sometimes women decide the same. I said men as the thread is about a man's actions..

Yes, there is. Countless people have told you this already.

Then he shouldn't have agreed to a sushi date. Also, if it's out of his price range that's another reason for the OP to not date him.

Then prove it; it’s a simple thing. Prove it. Post a link as everything I google says there is not. It is just the 100 on an individual transaction; and my bank has no limit to how often you can tap.

so prove it. If you are correct it will be simple

Your card being declined would be enough to red flag you in my book, never mind him asking for your half.

I'd not see him again.

Tbh I want the man to pay on the first date usually (...but maybe not considering you went for a full meal). But the way he handled this...would have left a taste in my mouth almost as bad as the sushi xD

Your bank maybe isn't the same as the OP's bank. Plus, just because the bank doesn't admit that it happens, doesn't mean it doesn't happen. It happens to me all the time, if I use the same card more than twice in a day, the third time I need to enter my PIN. The amount of money is irrelevant, as obviously I'm not including transactions over £100.00 as they can't be contactless in the first place.

How many times to people have to explain that the card was not 'declined'!! The OP tried to tap, was not allowed to, so had to enter her PIN. Her date then played the White Knight in front of the restaurant staff then had the front to demand his half many hours later. If I were the OP, there wouldn't be a second date.

This would piss me off too!

Or maybe he just jumped in because he thought OP’s card had been declined and was trying to spare her embarrassment

well then he's a bit dim because it's not at all unusual to have to put your PIN in when you try contactless to start with. He could have waited to see if her card was accepted second time round and THEN pretend to be chivalrous.

It would piss me off as Id lose my airmiles on my share 😂

I literally pay everything I can via my Avios CC and fly the world as a result !

One to avoid.

And then changed his mind again later on and asked her for half after all?

Then the question arises - what on earth did the OP say to him after he'd paid but before they took their leave of each other

He wouldn't have had to ask her if she'd had the manners to offer, in line with the arrangement already agreed.

By waving her card away, he voided the 'arrangement already agreed'. He didn't say 'I'll just cover this now and you can transfer it over', he said 'I've got this'. To me, that means that it was his treat and by going back on that, he looks like a penny pinching loser.

That’s not true. If I wanted to tap my card 1000 times in 24 hours, I can do so without any limitations. If one of those transactions exceed £100 then I’ll need to put my card in OR my bank will ask me to verify the payment. You can easily Google it and find out. @Janetime is right

"He voided the 'arrangement already agreed'." Give over! It's a restaurant, not a court of law.

if I use the same card more than twice in a day, the third time I need to enter my PIN.

Lol wtf. Who do you bank with:/

Carpet fitters are minted ! My son is one , good ones earn a fortune , more than accountants 😂

That may be so in theory, but in practice it isn't. Not all banks work the same way, anyway. I can assure you that I cannot just tap tap tap all day on the same card without being asked to enter my PIN. After two or at the most three times, the machine asks me to enter the pin and I get a message to my bank app saying 'card declined' even though I have money in the account. I don't know why @Janetime is so insistent that this isn't true. It is.

It is indeed true. The text message I get from my bank even says ‘your card has been declined as you have exceeded your contactless payment limit for today’. It happened to me only this morning.

Of course it's not a 'court of law'. What a strange statement. OP is asking if she is BU to be put off by his behaviour, not what the legal position is. Those of us who have a clue about sexual dynamics and how people actually behave are telling her she isn't. Those who think that dating is some equal oppurtunity social experiment are telling her she is.