Prostitute checked into our hotel!

[GrumpyL]

Ok, so away in London for a couple of days with DH and DD (10). We were staying in a 4* Hotel which is part of a large chain of hotels, not a small independent. We went to reception about 10.30 on the 2nd morning and was met with a lady (who was very obviously a prostitute) being told her room would be ready in 5 mins and her handing over £100 in cash to the receptionist. The hotel is £250+ a night and check in is 3pm!

AIBU to this this made the hotel feel a bit icky and sleazy after I saw that? Husband and I spoke briefly when DD wasn’t listening and he said “well they have to work somewhere!”. Not sure if I’m turning into a prude in my old age, but I really didn’t feel comfortable in the hotel after I saw that. I’m sure for her, it was a safe and comfortable place to work and I know this goes on in hotels, I suppose just seeing it in broad daylight shocked me a bit. We knew what she was there for, the receptionist knew what she was there for, the man behind us in the queue knew what she was there for, maybe I thought she and the hotel should have been a bit more discreet if they allow this to go on in their hotel, especially when it’s a family friendly hotel and there were a lot of children around?

Source?

As long as she isn’t having sex on the reception desk, l don’t see an issue here! People have sex in hotels!

Her reasons for staying as a paying guest are not relevant to anybody else. If she is a prostitute, her safety is paramount. If she is having an affair, that really is her own business. Likewise if she is taking a daytime room to sleep after a long day or nightshift and/or work.

l travel a lot for work and often check into an hotel after a 15 hour flight which can be in the mornings. I’ve never thought about others seeing me as a prostitute on arrival before.

Because it’s a public forum and this is a discussion. I was simply pointing out that no-one is saying all prostitution is rape.

Nobody said all women. And do you think because you know of one woman who sells herself voluntarily to one man means trafficking into prostitution doesn’t happen ?

https://committees.parliament.uk/writtenevidence/64627/pdf/

https://committees.parliament.uk/writtenevidence/64627/pdf/

Re- posted this link. It’s worth a read for anyone genuinely interested in the facts surrounding prostitution. It’s an evidence based report to a parliamentary enquiry on decriminalising the selling of sex. The report avoids using language which ‘normalises’ the selling of sex and refers to it as prostitution throughout - when you realise the issues involved it’s not hard to see why.

I'm just interested to know if anyone watched the 'City Sauna' documentary on channel 4 from a few years ago?

City Sauna was a brothel in my nearest city, Sheffield. I'd be interested to know, if anyone did watch it, which I did, what you think about the women featured in that?

The industry response linked above is equally interesting.

This thread is hilarious.
We have the lived experience of a child under the age of 10 who was basically stolen and forced into prostitution.
The posts from a woman who has also been trafficked and forced into prostitution.
Then the experience of a hotel worker who confirmed that the vast majority of people who pay for a room like the woman in this scenario did, will be using it to either have sex with a prostitute, or sex with someone other than their wife.
Yet still posters are insisting that they ( who have never had the experience any of these people have) know better.

The ‘industry’ has a vested interest in challenging the selling of sex being made legal and the buying of it made illegal.

Of course it does. Talk about stating the bleedin’ obvious.

Try googling Saafe (note the spelling) for some professional points of view.

I have a 10 year old as well and they know what sex work is. I don't remember how the discussion came to be, but they asked and I answered in an age-appropriate way.

No that's not what I'm saying at all. Of course I know that trafficking happens in prostitution, that many prostitutes are drug addicts and have a history of sexual abuse. I find it morally repugnant to have sex with these women.
However, whenever there's a discussion about porn or prostitution there are many, many women who say that most of these women are trafficked, that you can't buy consent, that all sex with a prostitute or a porn star is rape. I just don't agree. An adult women can choose to have sex with a man for money. She can give consent. It's ridiculous to argue otherwise. People are literally saying a woman is unable to consent if she takes payment.

There are very few facts in that report and a lot of estimates from the Home Office and Met Police which can’t be completely replied upon. The scale of trafficking in the UK is notoriously difficult to quantify.

https://www.theguardian.com/uk/2009/oct/20/trafficking-numbers-women-exaggerated

Yes!!!

The article you’re linking to is 14 years old !!

No. Women who have been forced into prostitution as well as under age girls, by definition do not give consent. That’s the difference. Of course any woman can decide for herself that she wants to engage in prostitution - if she has agency over her own decisions, that’s on her. But that’s not what we’re talking about here. Women who are trafficked are not giving consent, they’re being forced into it to pay their debts.

Exactly! And the same statistics are still being banded around as facts when they are not. Check out the sources listed in the Parliamentary report I was referring to. It is the same sources discussed in the Guardian article.

These statistics are old and highly inaccurate.

Yes I'm well aware of that. I'm talking about the people who say all prostitution is rape.

then what did you want to do with him

You didn’t post a link to the report, so not sure which one you’re referring to. If it’s the same report that this submission was made to, then it’s not the same one as the Guardian 2009 article, because Agenda are quoting from studies from 2011 through to 2016.

https://committees.parliament.uk/writtenevidence/64627/pdf/

1Cusick, Campbell, Kinnell & Brooks-Gordon (2009) “Wild guesses and conflated meanings: Estimating the size of the sex worker population in Britain” Critical Social Policy
2 Melrose, M. (2002), Ties that bind - Young People and the Prostitution Labour Market in
Britain presented at Fourth Feminist Research Conference, Bologna: September 2000
3 Benson, C. and Matthews, R. (1995), Street prostitution: Ten facts in search of a policy in International Journal of Sociology of the Law, Vol. 23, pp395-415
4 Benson, C. and Matthews, R. (1995), Street prostitution: Ten facts in search of a policy in International Journal of Sociology of the Law, Vol. 23, pp395-415
5 Home Office (2004). Paying The Price
6 ibid
7 Independent Domestic Violence Advocates: information briefing. Prostitution and domestic violence’ (December 2010) Published by AVA
8 Home Office (2004). Paying The Price
9 ibid
10 Melrose, M. (2002), Ties that bind - Young People and the Prostitution Labour Market in
Britain presented at Fourth Feminist Research Conference, Bologna: September 2000
11 May, T. and Hunter, G. (2006). Sex work and problem drug use in the UK: the links, problems and possible solutions. In R. Campbell and M. O'Neill (eds.). Sex work now. Cullompton: Willan
12 May, T. and Hunter, G. (2006). Sex work and problem drug use in the UK: the links, problems and possible solutions. In R. Campbell and M. O'Neill (eds.). Sex work now. Cullompton: Willan
13 Salfati, C. G. (2009). Prostitute Homicide: An Overview of the Literature and Comparison to Sexual and Non-Sexual Female Victim Homicide
14 Tackling Street Prostitution: Towards an holistic approach, Marianne Hester and Nicole Westmarland University of Bristol, Home Office (2004)

It is referencing the Home Office Report from 2004 for it’s government and met police statistics. The same ones discussed in the Guardian article.

I agree we should not normalise the selling of sex.

Regarding the hotel referenced by the OP, are they even taking some basic steps to ensure that their premises are not being used for prostitution, or having a process whereby staff with reasonable grounds can report a suspicion?

Yep. So what’s your point ? You’re the one who quoted it.