To ask what your biggest problem in life is at the moment?

[Biggybigbiggles]

Just that really... mine is that I feel frumpy and ugly. Having always been tiny, I've gotten to 30 and I suddenly just feel disgusted with what I see any time someone takes a photo of me.

If you could click your fingers and remove a problem you have, what would it be?

Suddenly becoming a 40 year old widow with two small DCs to look after in a strange country and having no support, financially or otherwise as everyone went back to their own lives and to hell with us.

Waiting for everything here to be sorted then have to somehow organise to move back to my home country and the little family I have left and hope can finally start to actually grieve for my soulmate.

Completely disillusioned by life.

Cost of living.
Arsehole ex partner who won’t contribute anything for our child in order to punish me for leaving him.

Winning the lottery would help immeasurably!

@IKnowYouBetterThanThat for frizzy, wavy hair, I'd recommend this product https://www.amazon.co.uk/John-Frieda-Secret-Avocado-Frizzy/dp/B000S5TXEQ/ref=asc_df_B000S5TXEQ/?tag=googshopuk-21&linkCode=df0&hvadid=310776493634&hvpos=&hvnetw=g&hvrand=8131918849355004676&hvpone=&hvptwo=&hvqmt=&hvdev=m&hvdvcmdl=&hvlocint=&hvlocphy=1006948&hvtargid=pla-435029281183&psc=1&mcid=3b671342a34b308893649e1a94c2e87e&th=1&psc=1 It's a game changer for me. And, use hairspray. I used to keep it for special occasions only

Can I just say, for those who are battling with their weight, perhaps perimenopausal or post children, you absolutely can do something about it. You do have control and you can feel good about how you look and more importantly how you feel again. I know what it’s like and it took me 13 years and 5.5 stone to reach the point where I did something about it. But, it can be done.

My 40 year old son, married with two young children, announced he was a woman. He’s left his wife. I’ve been utterly devastated by this as it’s come completely out of the blue. He was a happy normal kid, no sign of what’s now happening.

I’m with JKR on this issue and I can’t accept what’s happening. He’s been deeply unpleasant to me and has bullied me. I’m broken.

All the trauma my late husband brought to my life. And the trauma he’s still brining despite being dead for nearly 4 years. If anybody has a magic wand or something that’d be great!

-To just be in a new house I actually like.
-To see a real quality education in this country for my DDs as the area we are in is awful and I just wish I could create an aspirational environment for them outside their front door.

Just found out my spine has disintegrated and it is incurable. The consultant was so dog tired he had tears in his eyes when he told me. I ended up comforting him.
Walked out unable to imagine a future in this much pain. I am reeling this weekend - all the money in the world can’t fix this.
I can’t even speak about it in real life I am so sad.

💔💔Sorry to read that. Hope your DC and you can get some support xx

Get a backdated sick note and then claim your AL back

Not getting my printer to work.

It’s so awful. I’ve remembered you’ve said about your DS before I think. My DD lives her life in 2 halves. I just want to see her with someone normal.
Thank you for your words of encouragement that really helps.

Feeling nervous and on edge all the time.
Feeling sad and empty all the time.
Feeling like I’m failing my kids all the time.
Feeling stressed all the time.
Mental health is just fucked.

My ex’s behaviour is a huge problem.
I wish I had more money.
I’m worried about my 13 year old.
My looks have plummeted over the past 5 or 6 years which ties in with when my mental health problems got worse.
I had a termination in 2017 and it still affects me. I have a hoarding problem.

So much more.

Gosh, when type it all out like that it really makes me realise just how much I have going on and why my mind can’t cope.

In the very short term, my youngest has caught another stomach bug. It was 6 weeks ago he caught the last one and that lasted two weeks. Stomach bugs worry the life out of me since my middle son and youngest were hospitalised with one last year. A local hospital has had a severe norovirus outbreak and has declared a critical incident as a result, which is only adding to the anxiety.

Longer term, I’m in a job I hate but have no idea what else I’d do. Also need to lose 4 stone.

I wish my parents had been more forthright about this. 'Let them learn by their mistakes' and all that when you're an adult, but some mistakes are too big to recover from. Can you do anything to help her get away?

I would snap my fingers and have my wonderful 15 month old DD start sleeping through the night at last! We're all so tried and I think I'd feel so much more like my old self if I could sleep properly again.

There are not enough hours in the day to get everything done.

If there were enough hours in the day, I would be too tired to do it anyway.

I feel like I'm on a treadmill that won't stop.

Had my car stolen, its been found but don't know what state its in yet. Hassle and expense.

Incredibly lonely even with an active social life and good friends. Seems every man I date is a player and a user. I feel like an idiot for believing them.

53 and probably perimenopausal. Feeling depressed and like I have no future. Nothing feels interesting or exciting. Struggling to get anything done and feeling overwhelmed. Can't have hrt due to previous breast cancer. Don't feel its worth seeing GP

She still lives at home fortunately but she’s very distant. She’s lost all of her friends and just obsessed with him. All we can do is try to keep a supportive relationship with her. We’ve talked and talked to her but it’s like she’s in a cult. It’s heartbreaking. She’s absolutely beautiful inside & out.

@Tumbleweed101

Dont know if this might help?

https://www.tiktok.com/@excel.friend?_t=8lKE3nZeKLh&_r=1

Me too.

Money and mental health.

More money wouldn't fix my mental health, but money worries definitely make it worse.
Better mental health would help me have more money, but it doesn't seem to be getting better anytime soon.
Bit of a vicious circle.

I hear you.

I left and emotionally abusive when I was a couple of months shy of my 41st birthday, and had high hopes of really getting stuck into building a wonderful new life for myself.

I worked out the other day that I’ve basically had 8 months of normal, stress free living since then.

I turn 50 next year and feel like I’m watching my life through a sand timer atm.

That said, many posts on here have given me some much needed perspective.

My God I’m so sorry to hear this! I hope they can sort pain relief for you. I’m also a person who can’t talk in real life when really sad/in shock. I use a counsellor when I hit hard times, as I can voice everything to a stranger. Would that help you? Love and prayers 💐

My back is fcuked.
I've had 2 major operations on it and I'm still in bits. The strong meds I'm on no longer keep the pain at bay.
It's having an impact on everything. Work, sleep, rest, social, physical, intimacy.
I can't sit for longer than an hour. So no meals out, cinema, socialising.

I'm miserable in my job but there is no way I would pass a physical for another.

I'm paying for physio every 2 weeks but have now reached a stage where I'm past my excess with health insurance so can no longer claim any money back on these appointments.