To have asked him to choose a different sandwich

[Medsy]

Don't know if it's because it's Easter or what but my local co-ops sandwich section was totally barren, only meat sandwiches left (I'm vegetarian). I saw a man go for the last cheese one there was, so I asked him if he was vegetarian and if not, would he mind if I had it? A woman (wife?) appeared and went batshit at me and called me rude.
It made me quite pissed off actually. I wouldn't have a problem with say a gluten free person asking me if they could have the last gluten free sandwich.
WIBU?

Most supermarket sandwiches are shite, I grab a ciabatta or roll and make it when I get home.

I thought I was entitled to ask though. I'm sorry if you find engaging in conversation with strangers to be equivalent to bad manners, are you one of those that cowers behind the front door when the bell goes?

You absolutely were not entitled to ask a stranger in this situation at all. it's nothing to do with cowering behing the front door/fear. It's to do with the position you are putting the stranger in by challenging them and basically asking them to hand over their selected product as I explained in my post above:

It is rude because you are making a request of a stranger that is a challenge to what they are doing and entitled to do (buy a sandwich).

You then put them in an unpleasant and awkward position of either feeling pressured to hand it over or refuse and feel guilty/challenged.

It's a pretty self centred thing to do really to ask a stranger to hand over goods they have already selected.

Oh OP, now you're insulting other posters because they called you out on your entitled behaviour. Aren't you mortified yet? I'm embarrassed for you.

OP I dont have a problem with a polite ask. I don't like the " are you vegetarian" but a polite "any chance you would consider another as its the only vegetarian sandwich left I get it you want it but thought I would chance it" with a big smile I would be ok with.

I am NOT ok with your " philosophy" of vegetarianism. You don't get to decide if "you" being a vegetarian is more important aka a philosophy" than the person who chooses to not have a lot of processed meats. That can also be a philosophy if we must go down the philosophical way of things. However, if we do go down that road them being omnivores is also a philosophy and again yours doesn't trump others.

Brexit has nothing to do with this and your Surrey comments is outright rude. so was the dude's partner btw.

As a rule though on Easter Sunday they wont get deliveries and due to this will be low stock on sandwiches. So next year bring your own or go earlier.

Oh noes!!

@Medsy why do you think your want for a vegetarian sandwich because philosophy trumps my want for a vegetarian sandwich due to disability?

Why would you use it as an excuse to get something else? Why wouldn't you have the wit to get something else in the first place if you don't even like sandwiches?!
Yours is the maddest post yet.

Do explain how it's strange? I'm all ears.

This made me laugh. I sometimes look up posters who are being particularly obtuse and when I am bored.

On this thread last year re
What's the most BORING subject people can bring up?
your response was as follows:

Medsy · 16/08/2023 12:14
Their kids
Their pets
Brexit (either side)

Stop being boring!

OP whilst you assert you are not rude or entitled, the belligerent manner in which you are dismissing others opinions on a topic you posted, presumably to garner opinions and responses, only serves to show you as indeed rude and entitled.

Why did you post? What were you hoping to achieve? You obviously think you were behaving in a normal manner. If so, why post?
I think it's normal to choose a bath over a shower this morning. Why would I seek comments about this decision? I wouldn't because it's not something I ponder as an opinion piece.

Forget it's worth I think speaking with people is fine. Putting people in position where they feel in any way pressured is not fine. That you doubled down by not just mentioning your desire for the sandwich but putting a qualifier of you beings vegetarian and asking if they were tips you over into pressurising

OP and for what it's worth I voted remain

Also wondering how its strange when this is literally what happened 🤔

What a weird thing to do. What if he just didn’t like the other things on sale? He got there first so tough luck.

Were you hoping for more sympathy if you came back to the thread dressed as a Crying Mushroom?
Worth a try 🤣

To give you the benefit of the doubt, you’re probably young, think you have the world sussed out- the arrogance of youth and all that.

We all know (as women) that if you approach a lone man in a shop with a smile and ask for something sweetly, they’re putty in your hands. Most would hand over their entire meal deal because they love to be chivalrous to young attractive women.

Unfortunately, women have little respect for other women who use this ploy to get something they want and you did it without realising his wife was standing right behind him 😬

Op, I really hope this is a made up thread & you’re not really as obnoxious as you come across. Otherwise, I really hope I never get to meet you.

you said it wasn’t applying any pressure, asking the question to someone that had already made their choice was applying pressure for them to change their mind.

You being vegetarian is your philosophy & someone choosing not to eat heavily processed meat is their choice. Get a grip. What part of your philosophy for not eating meat is to encourage others to eat it?

your responses to many of the posts here have done nothing but make you come across as a more & more selfish & entitled person than you did originally.

although the vast majority of people have said they believe you were in the wrong & rude, you have taken no heed of this. Why post on AIBU?! Were you just looking to see how many people you could offend in your hangry state after being unable to purchase the single item in a supermarket you would have been able to consume in line with your philosophy?

Oh come on, this is a daft post. I'm middle aged but my DDs are young attractive women and know well that sadly random lone men are far more likely to abuse young women rather than be "putty in their hands"

They also have more respect for women as they wouldn't make such a post denigrating other women in this stereotyping way.

I want to know how old you are now @Medsy (and still waiting for explanation as to the good luck thing!)

Meh op has been pretty denigrating about the “bat shit” wife and other misogynistic comments about the “wife vibe” on this thread. I’m not saying all young women act like this either- no need to take offence on behalf of your daughters or women in general!

Most men are not “more likely” to abuse women than be polite to women in a shop. Not in my experience anyway.

When people say vegetarians/vegans come across as entitled I never realised how right they were. WHO the fuck do you think you are.

I think there could have been some compromise here, as always. Could you have split the remaining sandwich and then supplemented from the rest of the shop to bulk out? Were you eating close enough together e.g campsite / Picnic Park or about to go your separate ways ?

Are you actually serious? 😬

Absolutely. Sometimes a bit of humour in a tense situation can completely diffuse things:
"What if we split it?"
"LOL what?"
"Let's split the last sandwich!".
Then everyone gets a bit of sandwich and also a story to tell later !

Oh, give over. Sweet Jesus!
I hope I never encounter you in the supermarket.

I'm not veggie but never eat meat in a pre-made sandwich. And I would have looked at you like you were some weirdo and walked off with my cheese ploughman's sandwich.