AIMB to embrace the grey?

[DyddDewiSant]

I'm 57 this year. My natural hair colour is very dark brown, but I started going grey years ago and have always dyed it. I've had enough and have decided to embrace the grey! My hair is short and I've almost grown out the dye now, I'm getting used to it and rather like it.........but I've had some very strange reactions from some people who are horrified!!!
Have you embraced the grey? How did you find people reacted?

So much for grey hair being ageing. I hope all those words taste delicious.

I wish I could. Natural colour is dark brown. Started finding greys at 30 and I’m totally grey now at 47. But I’m fair skinned, pink undertones, blue eyes and it would really wash me out.
It looks stunning on sallow skinned people with dark eyes.

Yeah this, I am a bit younger - early 50s - and I have natural light brown hair. Was very blonde til about 13-14 y.o. but then went light brown. I have been dying it blonde since I was 16, and have ZERO intention of 'embracing the grey.'

Also, like you, (as I have said before,) I only have a few greys coming through at the temples, and sort of by the ears (where the hair joins on at the side of your face.) I would say about 10-15% of my hair is grey, if that. It's a bit different if you're already 100% grey. Constantly dying it would be a pain in the arse. The white roots would show through in about a week. I don't have to re-blonde mine for 2 months. Can get away with 3.

I have seen (as I said before,) some younger women with steel grey/light grey hair, and although I don't much care for it, each to their own. Is that what the younger women (under 45) are here are doing who are posting pics of themselves? The grey just looks too smooth and too perfect. Anyone I have ever seen 'going grey' has different shades, and some of their original colour showing. People don't generally just 'go white' at 35-40. I think there may be some cheeky boxes of hair dye at play here. And not just with the younger ones...

I have seen women - usually a little bit younger than me, my age, and older - whose hair is greying, and you can tell it's going naturally. Too many of these greys on the photos that some posters are submitting look too smooth, and like it isn't 100% their natural grey. Some of it yes, but not all. (JMO.)

I also never seen women under 45 with totally grey hair, not natural grey anyway, just that silver colour that some younger women put on. I am not a fan of it, but it's up to them what they do.

As I said, some of us are fortunate to only be 10-15% grey, so I can't exactly embrace the grey. It would look shit (IMO) with streaks growing out of a light brown, Much easier to embrace it when it's all grey. when you have no choice.

Finally, as I said before, I am struggling to fathom why random people are running up to all these white/grey haired women and gushing over their grey/white hair colour. I have literally never known of, or seen that happen. As a pp said, if it's someone you know, maybe they feel awkward, if they used to see you with brown hair and you suddenly got a shock of white hair, and they don't know how to react. Most people are polite, and aren't going to say 'fuck me Julie, I don't like your hair!' are they?! I also never see women under 45 in real life with grey hair. Funny that. And yeah I DO get out plenty thank you. 😆

I'm 55 and only five percent grey, my hair is long and thick, good condition but l know l will have my work cut out keeping on top of the colour once the grey does take hold.
I think you need to do what feels best for you. I don't take much notice to be honest of other people's hair colour, and Yasmeena Rossi, famous model, went grey very young and never affected her career, she's late 60s now and still looks good.

I do agree with this. As the front third of my hair is now white / very pale silver I can't see the dodgy back bit as easily so I can pretend it's not bad 😂

I have lots of friends who are embracing the grey and I think they all look great. My grandma went a silver grey and I wish mine would. Mine is naturally a dark blonde. I have highlights but my daughter tells me I should just leave it to all grow out and embrace the natural look. I'm still waiting for the grey to arrive to do that!

@ChopOrNot that looks great and natural at the same time. The ladies with consistent platinum colours also look great but I agree that surely this a really rare outcome - to be completely grey/white all over so young - so not perhaps something available to most.

I am not willing to let go yet, but clearly at some point I will have to as my natural colour is very dark brown (I dye slightly lighter as I don't think it is possible to dye as dark as mine and look plausible). But I do not for the life of me see how I will transition. I have waist length hair (I guess by the time I feel I have to go grey maybe I will also be willing to let that go) and the back of my head is still fairly dark, but parts of the top are probably 80% white.

So how does one transition without locking oneself in the house for 2 years and then getting an urchin cut?

I get the patches bleached out to match the rest. And a toner in it. My hairdresser was telling me how much better modern products/bleaches are for not damaging the hair, and it lasts for ages. Liberating after trying to maintain colour, with roots needing doing every three weeks!

Same here. Cool skin tone with pink undertones and blue eyes. I’m waiting u til my hair is all white. Agree that olive skinned dark eyed types look stunning with grey hair.

Like others the darker grey is at the back.

I’m naturally blonde but for some reason had gone dark a few years ago. I got back to light with lots of highlights over a few sessions and then my natural white grew in. I’m also mid fifties, but been going white for years.

And I’m pale. I do always wear makeup though, I guess but always have done. I need less with my light hair than when it was dark

You are exactly the same colouring as me. Had to change some of the colours I wore with dark hair, but my (now long, because it’s in better condition than it’s ever been) silvery grey hair works very well with my Celtic skin tone.

And yes, I’m another who regularly has strangers comment on my fabulous hair colour.

Thought I'd join in the pics...loving them all. Happy Easter you fabulous people !

Depends on your skin tone. I went totally grey after chemo and it didn’t match my warm undertone skin at all. I’ve gone back to dying it gold/caramel and look much better.
Grey can look wonderful on many people though. If you feel good, go for it.

Strange take. I of course didn’t go completely white between 35-40. I started going grey in my teens and dyed my hair for 20 years before being completely fed up and depressed at how awful my hair looked with constant white roots no matter how often I coloured it.

Evidence should you so desire it.

Same here - fair pinkish tone skin, grey-green eyes, original hair colour was mid/darkish brown. My grey hair doesn't wash me out at all (the purple shampoo helps). I haven't even changed the colours I wear - autumn colours, reds, pinks, blues, greens, purples, the lot. I do try to have some strong colour in whatever I'm wearing on any given day.

Hair tonight (unbrushed since this morning) under warm electric light.

I stopped dying mine around 10 years ago in my late thirties. There were a lot of negative comments while I was doing it but nothing negative since, I do get a lot of positive comments now, often from strangers. I went from very dark brown to almost white. My skin is a pale olive but with cool pinky tones and I have green eyes. Red lipstick and bright coloured clothes work well on me.

Finally, as I said before, I am struggling to fathom why random people are running up to all these white/grey haired women and gushing over their grey/white hair colour. I have literally never known of, or seen that happen.

I'm guessing the comments are coming from other women of a similar age who are considering their options. I have no intention of going grey yet but I have sincerely complimented my mum's neighbour and a woman my own age at work on their beautiful silver hair. Turns out they both help it a bit, which is useful to know for the future.

When you are younger you just assume old people have grey hair and it requires no comment. When you get to that age you suddenly start noticing successful and unsuccessful grey hair looks.

I think compliments come if people see lovely coloured well cared for hair, that suits the person, regardless of that colour

I've had compliments from very young women who are dying their hair a similar colour. Many assume mine is naturally platinum blonde. There are always people pointing me out and asking for my colour when I'm at the hairdresser's. They are always told it can't be dyed that colour, it has too many natural tones to it. I hate that these threads always attract women who like to put other women down. What a shame they don't have the confidence to wear their own natural hair or post their pictures here when criticising others. Mine is in fabulous condition now I don't dye it, thick, full and wavy. I love it and don't need anyone telling me I look old or I'm too young to wear it as it naturally grows. I'm interested in fashion, know what suits me, dress well and hold myself with confidence and certainty don't present as an old woman.

I used the lockdown periods to go grey gracefully (try saying that three times at speed!). It's in good condition and actually growing really long now, I'd forgotten how fast my hair grows when I don't have 8wkly hairdresser trips!

I’ve broken all the ‘rules’. I embraced the grey years ago and when I discovered I had ringletty curls I grew it to nearly waist length.

Don’t care about looking older as I am older. Don’t care what people who spend hours and £££ on blending their greys in feel about it as I don’t care what they do with their hair and I’d like that courtesy reciprocated. Don’t think I’ll be cutting or dyeing it any time soon

I saw my first grey hair in my naturally black hair at 17. My hair has been coloured for decades. It’s never looked natural but at least it does now

Beautifully cut, well cared for hair will get compliments and I also think if it is grey and shining people will remark. I think that going grey in your 30s and 40s will make you look older but once you get to your 50's and beyond , coloured hair doesn't magically make anyone look younger.

Finally, as I said before, I am struggling to fathom why random people are running up to all these white/grey haired women and gushing over their grey/white hair colour. I have literally never known of, or seen that happen.

@SabreIsMyFave - I’ve had numerous women (both older and younger than me) at the gym and pool ask me when in the changing rooms - usually it’s “where do you get your colour done?” Silver with thin streaks of pewter costs a lot of money apparently

Even some male friends, whom I would not call terribly observant, commented on my “great new colour.”

Maybe you only spend time around women who aren’t confident in their natural colour, or maybe you’re unobservant. Possibly you’re just too judgmental for grey and silver haired women to spend time around willingly.

Lots of people look great with their natural hair colour.

You could be me! But you have better hair. It looks fabulous. Mine was also black and started to go grey in my teens. It is now long, wavy and silvery grey - unless I straighten it, in which case it looks good for approximately 5 minutes, then starts to go frizzy.