AIMB to embrace the grey?

[DyddDewiSant]

I'm 57 this year. My natural hair colour is very dark brown, but I started going grey years ago and have always dyed it. I've had enough and have decided to embrace the grey! My hair is short and I've almost grown out the dye now, I'm getting used to it and rather like it.........but I've had some very strange reactions from some people who are horrified!!!
Have you embraced the grey? How did you find people reacted?

@theriseandfallofFranklinSaint · Today 15:18

No, because unfortunately men can get away with grey hair much more than women can. They don't look washed out and older (thinking of the few women I know who have gone grey) they generally just look like men their own age with grey hair.

Not a popular thing to post on here, but I agree. Men do look better with grey hair than women. I mean, women look OK with it grey over 60, but if a man and a woman (aged 40) have greying hair, it will look better on him IMO. As I say, not a popular view, and you will get accusations of misogyny, but I agree with you - men carry off greying hair better than women (under the age of 60 anyway.)

I just can't imagine why any woman would want to let themselves be seen with greying hair/grey while they're only in their 40s - or 30s. (Or even early-mid 50s.) I know some younger women DYE it grey (seems to be in fashion for 5 minutes!) It's different when it's naturally grey, as it often looks coarse and uneven. And yes it does make you look older than you would if it was dyed blonde or brown (whatever your original colour was.)

I'm very very hopeful it will all go white! Or at least grey. The sort of browny bits are getting greyer all the time!

Yeah, my random section looks a sort of dark greyish brown now (my hair was originally a mid brown, might have darkened over the years) but it's hard to tell what exactly it is, because i only see the strands mixed in with the proper pale grey when I pull the ends in front. I suspect I'm stuck with it now!

Nothing coarse or uneven in any of the pictures here. Mine certainly isn’t.

I'm 55 and don't care if anyone thinks I'm older. I like my hair, its a nice colour and is in good condition.
I'm too fat, I have wrinkly eyes and everything is heading south. Tbh my hair is my saving grace 😄

I take my hat off to you! I have tried to embrace the grey but hate it (on me). My skin colour is awful against it and the actual spread of grey and white in my hair results in a crappy natural colour (not that gorgeous steely white grey so many lucky ladies have).

I could not let it continue during lockdown and went back to dyeing roots every 4-5weeks. It grows like bloody summer hay, so never lasts!!
I honestly wish the wearing of wigs was as normal as getting nails and lashes done. I’d be up in the morning, five minutes for make up, wig plonked on and out the door!

I'm 38. Started getting greys in my early thirties. But it's been a slow process so far. I have never dyed my hair, and I don't intend to start.

@theriseandfallofFranklinSaint does it not occur to you that your whole post is just a display of learned, socialised sexism? All that "men look better grey" and "why would women want to look older" is entirely the product of women being valued only as youthful, pretty sex objects.

I’m 57 and definitely not going back to dying it dark brown as it used to be.

@Soontobe60 oh sure, I agree it's usually obvious when hair is coloured. But i still think people look older with grey hair

I like my white

Mid-50s, love my silver hair! I feel like a platinum blonde 😊

I'm not dyeing mine, I'm still mostly blonde but I'm too lazy to dye it!

Some beautiful examples of grey hair on here!

I've told quite a few women (strangers) how much I love their grey or white hair. And I've had several do the same to me. I do the same whenever I see particularly gorgeous hair (of any colour). Perhaps the grey stands out to me as it's more unusual though?

I have to say also that I don't understand the people saying they get lots of compliments on their grey hair. Are random people really stopping and saying 'hey, your grey hair looks really nice?!'

In response to this, the answer is yes! Random women in shops, pubs, the gym, the supermarket - it happens everywhere. I think that other women gain confidence by seeing and chatting to women who have already done it, and who feel confident in their own skin. They often say that they have thought about it but are a bit worried about how other people will respond. It's hard when we are battling centuries of socialisation and conditioning which tells us that our role is to be youthful and decorative. And internalised misogyny is definitely a factor! One of my favourite mantras is 'Remember that most of your insecurities were created in a boardroom full of men'. So if you're thinking about it, OP, give it a go - you can always go back if you decide it's not for you. There's no 'right' way to be a woman - we have lots of choices.

if you have nearly grown it out, stick with it. Grey can look amazing

And its about time that women were able to embrace going grey like men have forever.

And not be judged for it.

Nonsense misogyny

I absolutely get rando’s coming up to me to compliment the colour of my hair. Most recently the campest guy in a gay bar who came skipping over to exclaim ‘babes I LOVE the colour of your hair, you’re rocking it!’

But women in shops, the hairdresser, friends of friends etc. At least once a month I’d say, someone I don’t have an existing relationship with will say something positive about my hair colour 🤷🏼‍♀️

I decided to embrace the grey just before lockdown, I'd been yellow blonde for ages because my hairdresser wouldn't do the ash blonde I wanted (fair enough it would have wrecked my hair). I love it. The tone is so much better for my skin and no maintenance is great. The condition is better too. My hair is long and naturally wavy but I straighten it mostly. I too get random compliments on the colour.
However, I do have my eyebrows waxed and tinted (and my eyelashes lifted and tinted). I think that's the difference between looking 'deliberate' and 'can't be bothered'. Someone upthread said similar about lipstick.
All of you that have posted photos look fabulous!

I'm almost 60, naturally dark blonde. I've a few greys just starting to come through in the last year or so and I'm not having any of it! I'll keep getting highlights done as it blends the greys in. I'm not ready to embrace grey yet, I'm just not.

I get random women not only complimenting me on my hair, but asking what I use in it for the lilac-silver colour. Shock! Horror! Not all women are still in the grey hair = old = unfuckable = worthless mindset!

It would be easier for people to embrace the grey if it is ALL white. When it's patchy/different shades, it's much harder.

It would be easier for people to embrace the grey if it is ALL white. When it's patchy/different shades, it's much harder.