Cheeky Fckers

[thisisasurvivor]

I had a work trip on mon and Tue

Tue was a 12 hour day and was up since 4 working

My friend text at 9.30pm to let me know she needed to drop her soon uo at 8am
The next fcking day to be looked after

I text back that I was not even home yet

She didn't respond

7.40am next day knock on door
She dropped her son off

I was so angry/tired/ bewildered to go bat shit

SHE DIDNT TEXT AFTER TO EVEN SAY SORRY OR TO THANK me

I'm so done with letting this shit happen

Sorry I just need to vent

Next time she asks I need a firm response

No doesn't seem to work as she has been known to come up anyway and say she has no one

I'm a single parent and I work from home

She has dropped her kids to me many times while I work from home

Fcking cheek

She has many sister in laws who can step in wt f is she still as this utter shit

Are you working at home while looking after her kid ?

Your starting point is all wrong OP. She doesn't 'let you know' or 'give you notice' that she needs you to look after your child.

You ask - very very nicely. You buy a gift and/or return the favour ASAP.

The whole basis of the relationship is wrong.

OP fuck has got a U in it

And I would add that, if she ever abandons her child at your front door again, you will be handing him over to the authorities, @thisisasurvivor.

Dont "not respond". She'll keep texting, and turning up with her child. You need to say "NO".

Yes many times

Last year it was three of them

Now she just sends one up

She has sent him up to me sick many times as she could not take time off work

I know I have made it worse by not speaking out
I need to sort it out now for good

Summer time she expects at least one day a week I will take them

She has returned the favour maybe twice in the last 8 months

Block her , she’s taking the piss, her kids are not your responsibility

Have you messaged yet OP or just blowing off steam online?

This can be over in a minute, just send the text.

I'm a single parent with very few to help me

She has her parents and many people she can ask

She could also bloody pay for childcare

Her and her husband are full time earners
Madness

I have huge debt to pay off and I have told her this multiple times
I feel like cutting her off completely as she is a real cheeky mare
She also owes me for last years summer club as I paid for her son
But will obviously not get that back now

Love this! You responded with a travel update' 😂

So apart from all that, she’s a great friend?

How old are the kids?

It's your own fault.

1. You didn't say no

2 you let them in

But will obviously not get that back now

Have you actually asked for it back? Because you text about the tarmac was not clear.

8

Older boys are 12 and 13

She no longer expects me to take the older boys
So kind of her to just send one up

Ffs

Block and don't answer the door.

I think this is going to cost you the friendship but it will be worth it. She is completely using you.

I agree with the previous poster who said you should write to tell her you were really angry with her about her dumping the child on you. I think you should write to say that you're not going to look after her children anymore. She's taking the piss and doesn't reciprocate

She really is a CFer. Either block her or tell her. Otherwise she'll expect you to have the dc again next week.

Op. Please message her and let her know that you are unable to help in the future. Do it now. She's taking you for a ride.

Please be strong and text and tell her that’s you are annoyed that she sent her son to you without your agreement. That you are no longer prepared to be her unpaid babysitter and she needs to make other arrangements in the future. And stick to it. This woman is not a friend. She’s a user.

I am not sure why you are so angry with her when you haven’t told her not to drop him off. Explaining your travel itenary was completely unnecessary if you didn’t add that because of it you cannot look after her child. You thought it is implied, in her mind you were just telling her where you are.
same with money she owes - you are in debt but have you clearly asked her to return your money. Here is my bank account details - could you please transfer x amount I paid for the club for your son.

Just tell her that was the last time that's happening so if you value our friendship then you'll know not to ask/ assume again.

Ask her to cough up the money for her son's summer club. Any decent friend would have immediately reimbursed you. In the nicest possible way she is no friend. Friends don't treat each other this way. She is using you and will probably drop you when her youngest no longer needs childcare. For what its worth, I couldn't even get paid childcare at short notice for a sick child because nobody wants to look after a possibly infectious child.

Just tell her that you can't and won't be doing any childcare for her ever again and you don't care about whatever emergency she might think she has. Ask for the money she owes you first though. She obviously has the skin of a rhinoceros so you don't have to be subtle about telling her - you have to be firm and utterly clear. Do it by email and follow up with a call or test or whatever you normally do. Don't answer the door and if she dumps the child and runs, call her and tell her you will calling the authorities if he's not picked up within the hour. You can show the police the email.

Your 'friend' is not your friend - she is taking advantage of you but you are letting her. I see a lot of people on here posting about how annoyed or upset they are about something but doing nothing at the time. Next time she asks/ suggests you say no - I am working from home - working and do not want to look after your child - arrange childcare with a child care provider - I am not available or willing to do it. If she comes up with any bs about popcorn - you just reply - I said no. I am not available. I will not even be opening my door. You might find she self selects her way out of your life - which will be no great loss.