Cheeky Fckers

[thisisasurvivor]

I had a work trip on mon and Tue

Tue was a 12 hour day and was up since 4 working

My friend text at 9.30pm to let me know she needed to drop her soon uo at 8am
The next fcking day to be looked after

I text back that I was not even home yet

She didn't respond

7.40am next day knock on door
She dropped her son off

I was so angry/tired/ bewildered to go bat shit

SHE DIDNT TEXT AFTER TO EVEN SAY SORRY OR TO THANK me

I'm so done with letting this shit happen

Sorry I just need to vent

Next time she asks I need a firm response

No doesn't seem to work as she has been known to come up anyway and say she has no one

I'm a single parent and I work from home

She has dropped her kids to me many times while I work from home

Fcking cheek

She has many sister in laws who can step in wt f is she still as this utter shit

Well, that wasn't "No" was it?

But that's not an answer. It's irrelevant where you are that night, she was asking about the next day.

She's absolutely being a cheeky fucker, but you needed to say NO. You just sent an irrelevant, non commital response, which you obviously knew she hadn't taken on board.

Just say NO

How old is the child? And how long were you looking after him?

Perfect 👍

Hi Jane, just to let you know moving forward I can not be one of your options for child care. This week really took the biscuit to be honest. I was beyond exhausted and couldn’t believe you dropped X round despite me not being even home from a work trip when you asked me to have him. I’d been up since 4am and didn’t even say yes to having him! As you know, I’m on my own, working flat out and I’m at the point of burn out, looking after my own children is enough, I can’t do yours too. Enjoy the Easter break, I’m taking some much needed rest. Speak soon.

’im too snowed under with work to child mind Archibald. Having to work 12 hour days to make ends meet so it’s not practical to have an extra child’

You should have said no.

I think this is the perfect answer OP. Clear and concise!

Next time she texts don't dilly dally around with long responses and reasons. A firm no I'm not available is all you have to say. Then don't answer the door. She can't drop her child at yours if you don't let her. In fact, I'd be sorely tempted to block her number and cut her off.

Just say that you can’t look after her child anymore. If she turns up with her child at your place you will turn them away. If she drops her child and leaves immediately then you will call the police.

How has this arrangement even happened? Has it been a longstanding thing?

Not that it matters if u are busy it would just help in wording a reply.

And why do u refer to "slots" for her to do this????

What an awful person. Hope you have texted her now saying never drop your child off here again.

If you don't open the door she cannot leave him, so maybe get a ring doorbell or similar so you can see who's there and not answer if it's her.

You should have text back "I am unable to look after your DC tomorrow, you need to make other arrangements"

You also should not have answered the door, and let the child in.

"No." is a full sentence.

Your response was weird and could have been misinterpreted. Just be clear that you are not doing it. That you are not home or on a plane or eating a pizza has nothing to do with anything.

"No."

And if you want to be polite add some extra words: "No sorry can't help you"

I do think that when people behave in an entitled way (as this friend of yours does, OP), the only language they will understand is a firm "No". I have a relative who will routinely ask to stay at my flat / ask me for money - largely because in years past, I didn't say "No" enough, but I have since learned to and I do not regret it one iota.

Just stand your ground, OP, and say "No".

Message her saying, If she offloads her kid on you uninvited again you'll be calling the police for abandonment.

Then do it.

Things won't change otherwise.

I feel like you've found the friend I got rid of! Three years I put up with it for, it's so hard to say no isn't it? I'd get comments like "well you can't have plans because I'm at work and I'm the only one you go out with" and "I'll just leave him on your doorstep then".

I think you do have to have a moment of utter cuntfuckery before you finally say "NO. ENOUGH."

Say no, and then don't answer the door when she comes knocking.

You need to grow a backbone. Why did you say yes the first time? text her now and say you can't provide any more free childcare. Doesn't sound like you'd hugely miss her if it's the end of the friendship.

100 per cent

When I said well I'm wfh today

Yes but I can drop them to you

Leave them with a movie and pop corn they will make no. Noise

Fcking hell whaaaasst

Great idea

I'm just thinking of not responding again

And if she comes up then not answer the door

Next time say no immediately?

Agree with these 100 per cent

And it should have been a firm NO the other night too

This 👌🏻

And if this ends the 'friendship' then so fcking be it

Text that you won't be available again for babysitting and then block her number/email/social media. If she comes knocking don't answer.

Yes, definitely text her right away, letting her know that you are not doing any more child care again ever. Hopefully, this preempts any next time situation.