To be annoyed house was unlocked?

[Hettycan]

Just woke up to get water at 2am - go downstairs and automatically check front door is locked as I pass it as husband has many times before forgotten to lock it - it's unlocked and it's very slightly ajar. Go and check back door, that is also unlocked.

I check car keys are still there and nothing looks disturbed and go up to bed. My husband asks me what is going on as he's heard me opening and locking doors. I say in a hushed but annoyed voice you left both doors unlocked when you came up to bed (hours after I went to bed) - he just sighs and rolls over - I say someone could be in the house and he just lets out a mocking sigh like it's no big deal.

He genuinely thinks going to bed and forgetting to lock the house is no big deal, and I feel like it's a potentially dangerous fuck up - I am so annoyed, not about the mistake but about the blase attitude to it - he will clearly just do it again as to him it's "no big deal" so I'll add wake up and check doors are locked after he comes to bed to the mental load.

To be honest, theft of a car would be the least of my worries!!

For me, unlocked doesn't mean it's super easy to get in? It's still shut, so someone would have to barge the door with some force? I guess it depends on the type of door.
Maybe I'm naive. I'd be more concerned that it was ajar. That seems pretty remiss not to even shut the door! But occasionally unlocked when people are in, not so bad.

@BobbyBiscuits it depends on the door. Our back door can be opened from the outside just by using the handle if it isn't locked. No barging required.

An ongoing issue in my house so now i do get back up out of bed and check the doors. It's his lack of care about my feelings of safety and our children being safe that bothers me most. Death by a thousand cuts. I like him less and less as these small things add up.

Our front door doesn't need a key to open from the inside. I leave the keys on a hook by the back door.

I guess it depends on crime levels where you live. I always lock our door here in London, but it probably wouldn't be on my mind so much if I lived in a field in rural Devon.

But if it bothers you so much and you know he's careless and can't be trusted, why on earth don't YOU do it before you come up?

My ex left my front for unlocked on.occasion, but he lived in the depth of the country where no one locked their doors. It was really annoying.

They break into your house while you're asleep upstairs and take the car keys and anything else lying around. Pretty creepy.

@fieldsofbutterflies

my friend leaves her bifold doors to the back garden open all summer so that their dog has few run of the garden.

the dog is a chocolate lab, after he's licked them to check they're not made of sausages he'd just lay down and watch them burgling the house, he'll muster up a wimper if they're getting in the car without him, but a guard dog he isn't.

Plus they're dreadful for leaving expensive tech on the table that's visible from the front door & car keys on another easily visible surface.

if I say anything, she just rolls her eyes & says I worry too much!!

@Sirzy make sure your keys can't be fished out via your letter box. Bamboo burglaries are quite common.

@Zonder yeah, I think some front doors have that too, like when there's a porch?
My back door could be opened if unlocked but there's no street access at all as it's an enclosed triangle of houses.
I only know about the barging because I had to do it myself a couple times when lost my keys. Yikes!

@Yodel294 you would find the answer to this if you read the Ops posts.

But for some people, leaving a door unlocked is no big deal. They can do it for days on end. It depends where you live.

I wouldn’t rely on others to lock the doors, I would do it myself and double check before going to bed.

If you know he forgets why don’t you just lock it yourself before bed

People need to read op's replies as she has explained she goes to bed before him as she has a young baby that wakes. I think it is really thoughtless and he should at least care.

So nothing happened this time. Great. What about the next time? Or the time after that? What WILL it take for him to take it seriously?

Next time he does it take his car keys and hide them and make him think for a while that someone's come in and stolen them and they'll be coming back for the car later.

As for the fire escape question, I have been paranoid about this since a friend mentioned it to me. When we changed our front door we had a thumb turn installed on the inside, so we can lock it easily, but don't have to find a key if we needed to get out in a hurry.

All the other external doors have the keys nearby, hung up on hooks that are not accessible or visible from a window.

Growing up, couldn't even go upstairs without locking the backdoor (front door was always locked). I'm a little more relaxed where I live now but check doors are locked is just part of bedtime routine between my husband and I.
Being burglared is a horrible experience to go through.

I always check the doors before i go to bed. Once years ago I left my keys, including car key, in the lock on the outside of the door. I didn't realise until.the neighbour knocked next morning 😳
One summer night off we all went to bed and woke up next morning to realise that the conservatory doors had been left wide open!!
Basically a burglars dream. Luckily it seems no burglars had been in the vicinity that night!!

Can you immediately wake him up every time to tell him the doors unlocked. Put the light, make lots of noise,

Can't you just lock the door before you go to bed?

None of my doors have Yale locks, just standard locks with keys that need to be turned. Old, rural houses often have very old locks and replacing them is expensive.

Absolutely this

Read. The. OPS. Posts. Maybe?

No one can answer this for you. It depends on where you live etc. I would only lock my house if I were going away for a few days. I don’t tend to lock it overnight, and if I’m popping out for a few hours I want it unlocked incase a friend or neighbour stops by 🤷🏻‍♀️