Didn’t bring a gift for the baby

[fauxpasfriday]

Friend A met Friend B’s baby this weekend but didn’t bring a gift.

However, Friend A gave a gift at the baby shower and posted a small present on arrival.

Baby is 2 months but friends don’t live close.

Is Friend A UR?

Two gifts is one more than should be expected.

A card posted on arrival of baby would have been more than enough, a gift too is very generous, let alone an earlier gift. Friend B is being rude why on earth do they think they should get that many gifts.

Why would you think you were unreasonable?
Did friend B say something negative to you?

Baffled as it is so obvious A is not been unreasonable- what has happened to make friend A (you) to feel that you could have given a THIRD present?

Of course she shouldn't be expected to give a 3rd gift.

Can't vote, because you haven't given the option to say which reply is which!

But friend A is Not BU and Friend B, if they have complained IS being unreasonable

I've just seen your update @fauxpasfriday - no of course you weren't being unreasonable. I take it friend B made you feel bad for not taking yet another present?

I would as well, BUT I would never expect it if I were the mother of the baby, and it would not be remotely rude not to. The reason I would always bring a little something is purely self-idulgent: I absolutely love shopping for babies and children. I have no children myself and very little extended family, so when I do have kids to buy for I like to really go to town. Friend A has already been more than generous and friend B is a gimme-pig.

No one knows if friend B was being grabby or not tbf unless OP updates. If I went to see a friend and new baby in this scenario I might take some nice cakes/biscuits to share. But not another gift.

Sincerely hope that OP isn't Friend B moaning about not getting yet another gift out of someone.

She isn't. She said she is A.

Unless Friend A has a child/children and Friend B always brings a gift/gifts EVERY time she visits....

Friend A is perfectly fine with just giving a gift at the baby shower.
Friend B should be grateful for what was received and if they have made any comments I would politely tell them to f**k off x

It's crazy the amount that gets spent on someone else having a baby. In my old work the pregnant mum got a pregnancy massage voucher and a large baby gift. Then after birth everyone HAD to buy baby an individual gift. Then came the christening and another gift.
I just didn't go to christening I had spent way too much

Jeez how many gifts are expected is the baby royalty or is Friend B just an A hole

As friend B, I would have no concerns at all about Friend A arriving without a gift. So YANBU to not bring one.

Having said that, I'd probably have turned up with some flowers or something.

No more gifts are needed.

I might buy more if it were me, one of my friends buys something for DD every time we see them (not expected to be clear). But that’s absolutely not a societal norm.

I took a friend flowers yesterday because I wanted to. No-one made me. I am allowed to choose that. It’s no different. But friend can fuck off if they demanded flowers.

I definitely wouldn't bring another gift for the baby. I would probably bring flowers or biscuits / cake or some small gesture for the mum but I'd typicallly do that when visiting any friends not just ones who have had a baby.

I agree with this, if I had already given a present for the baby (I can’t imagine any scenario where I would give two!) I would take a nice cake or something for the Mum when I went to visit. Nothing major and tbh most people probably do that when visiting friends anyway, nothing specifically to do with visiting a baby.

Agree. Between marriages and babies, I've spent thousands on collections over the years and am yet to be a recipient!

A gift shouldnt be expected at all imo. Its a nice thing to do tho. The friend has already given two gifts. I think whoever has an issue with her not bringing a gift is being a greedy bugger

How many gifts does friend B want?!

If friend A hadn’t posted a gift then I’d usually expect them to bring a small token on meeting the baby. But having already sent it, friend B is being ridiculous if they are complaining.

Had the baby said something? What a CF!

Thank goodness there wasn't a gender reveal as well ! another expectation these days for more presents !!!

@fauxpasfriday has friend B actually said you're unreasonable?

Fwiw I don't think you are. I'd have probably taken something for mum/my friend though.