Didn’t bring a gift for the baby

[fauxpasfriday]

Friend A met Friend B’s baby this weekend but didn’t bring a gift.

However, Friend A gave a gift at the baby shower and posted a small present on arrival.

Baby is 2 months but friends don’t live close.

Is Friend A UR?

Of course not. You’re friend A, aren’t you?

I would have took a gift to the baby shower and sent a card for birth announcement. If there hadn't been a baby shower I would have took a gift on first visit.

This is so stupid. No one is entitled to gifts, whatever the situation.

This is the problem with the whole American baby shower thing. It throws a spanner into the usual etiquette that you take a gift when you visit the baby for the first time. A has already bought two gifts; B is grabby at this point is she expected another.

Title is incorrect. Should be 'my baby has had 2 gifts already and am I a CF for expecting a 3rd'

Is this for real? Of course Friend A is not being unreasonable, Friend B sounds ridiculous and entitled. A card and one gift is enough.

Friend B is a grabby CF

No
And this is why I don't like baby showers....the British superstition/ tradition used to be you waited till the birth....for good reason just in case. And its much nicer to give a gift once baby is there. Obviously if you aren't going yo see them straight away you post it.
One gift would have been generous let alone 2.

I'd just be happy someone was checking in to make sure we're both ok. No gifts required whatsoever. A hug and a cup of tea will do nicely 😊

Yep, no reason to expect more stuff.

I probably would have:

-Given baby gift at shower
-Send card at birth
-Brought MUM a gift when visiting.

Only if we are close friends.

Which friend are you @fauxpasfriday ?

Two gifts is more than enough, so friend B is being entitled.

We had friends give us a gift at our baby shower and then didn’t bring anything when they met the baby, which is completely normal and reasonable! Two gifts is very generous.

Who are the 15% of over 500 people who think that A is unreasonable?

I can only assume in the absence of the OP since the initial post that she must be B!

@Spirallingdownwards I’m A.

Sorry, I only caught up over lunch.

Has friend B actually called you out on this or are you just overthinking?

Phew. Thank goodness.

Your friend is the weird one then. You have done nothing wrong.

Has friend B said something to suggest they were expecting another gift?
Even if friend A hadn't given gifts before it's a bit presumptuous to assume a gift would be coming

Are you Friend B?

If i gave my friend a birthday present a week before on her actual birthday would i still be expected to bring a birthday present later on at her birthday party? .. no.

friend A has been generous giving gifts and no one should feel entitled to a gift i certainly didnt expect gifts with either of my two babies 4 years ago.

One present is more than enough.
I had DD 6 months ago, we had no baby shower and I didn’t expect anything when people came to visit. My most treasured gifts were some food from my grandparents and my little sister got a small teddy for DD from her own toy collection.
Why is friend B so grabby?

If I was going to B's house then I probably wouldn't have gone empty handed, but having already given two presents for the baby, then I might have taken something for B herself (nice bubble bath maybe, or flowers) or some nice biscuits to share with a cuppa.

If we were meeting up at a mall or coffee shop, I probably wouldn't have taken anything, but in that case I might have bought coffees.

You're A, did B say something about it?

Friend B is a grabby entitled idiot if she expects anything.

Nobody owes you a present when you have a baby

Nobody owes you a present when you’re pregnant

Nobody owes you a present when you get married

Nobody owes you a present on your birthday

Nobody owes you a present when you have a party

Nobody owes you a present when you move house

That’s not what a present is.

Dictionary definition of gift/present for anyone who’s confused:
”A thing given willingly to someone without payment.”

Agree with this. If you were at your friends house then yes I would have brought something, otherwise, you have been very generous!

No you gave a gift. Did your friend say something or are you thinking on reflection you should have brought another gift?

Friend B is grabby having a baby shower then expecting even more gifts.

I’d be dumping them pretty swiftly.