AIBU - Weeing in lay-bys is anti social and fines should apply

[Thriftnugget]

Item in the news- Dacorum Borough Council have stopped issuing fines for wild wees in lay-bys.
I know that this is on a technicality (anti littering law used and wild wees not classed as litter) but I think people weeing in lay-bys is appalling. It should be subject to fines. I can forgive toddlers/ young children but not adults. There are solutions for those with medical conditions that mean urgent wees are a symptom. And it’s always men. Women need urgent wees too (possibly more so, pregnancy etc) and we don’t pull up in lay-bys and squat in front of passing traffic. AIBU?

You lost me at the 'if I can manage then everybody else can' school of thought.

@Doingtheboxerbeat Did I? I can manage to not piss in lay-bys without consideration for anyone else. Seems like I’m in the minority for thinking that’s a reasonable stance although a few others here are in agreement. A lot of people seem to have read that I think people should be fined for wild weeing. Not the case as long as it’s not “publicly” and doesn’t make a public area stinky and unpleasant. This wasn’t about answering calls of nature in a way that doesn’t offend or inconvenience anyone else.

Urinating isn’t the problem as the liquid will be absorbed into the ground.

It’s the bottles of pee which are dumped everywhere. My Wombles group refers to them as drivers tizer. Even seen a ten litre bottle of it! How long did it take to fill it??

Then we find bags of human poo! Some are even in adult nappies. The smell is bloody disgusting.

One thing is that truck and van drivers facilities are very poor across the country.

Some drivers have regular customers/deliveries and use the toilet there. Some places still refuse the drivers to use the loos even after this time!

Then we have an alcoholic who lives round the corner who goes to the local shop for cans at least 3 times a day and regularly leans over garden walls to vomit, pees wherever he feels like and has been known to shit on people's gardens and regularly in the snickets. So a bit of lay-by peeing is not a problem to me.

Flipping Amazon drivers
In lockdown I picked it up (with a bag) and gave it back to him the next day. He looked very shocked. It was a 500ml Pepsi type bottle. He just threw it out his open door as he drove off.

I presume that's because you don't have any health issues surrounding toileting, not everyone is that lucky.

You have been informed countless times that women do indeed pee in lay-bys but do so discreetly - so you must be better than us by not doing it at all - discreetly or otherwise.
People have mentioned a plethora of reasons, including remote locations, long tailbacks etc and you're still doubling down on the ickyness and the smell like this isn't an emergency.

Men that get their knobs out in the middle of the road or in the street are a problem anywhere and everywhere in life, but the majority of us aren't doing that.

Former wild-wee-er here too, I still would in an emergency and I'd have no option to use a shee-wee (I just can't, not physically possible).

The difference is most women are inclined to do it discreetly, out of sight wherever possible. Some men are more inclined to do it in sight of others (even if you can't actually see any penis at all) because they don't have the hang ups women have about it as they aren't baring nearly as much as we'd have to.

And a few men will do it in sight of others just to be utter dicks.

I'd far rather litter particularly metal, plastics and broken glass were picked up or not left in the first place, its significantly more of a risk to everyone than wee!

Me too. I don't see the harm in it.

Anyone who is bothered should start campaigning for more public toilet provision, then it wouldn't be necessary.

It doesn't bother me in the slightest. YABU.

@Chonk did you fail to miss the part where I said one route there isn't a service station at all, just lay by's?! I'm pretty sure he'd much rather pull in to a service station and use a proper toilet facilities then have to stand behind the Truck to have a piss whilst hoping no one pulls up behind him.

@Chonk so no he isn't being ridiculous. What is ridiculous is the lack of places for Truckers to pull into that have proper facilities, and no one should have to drive round with a bottle of piss sat next to them.

@IBegYourBiggestPardon Nope, I didn't miss that, but it still doesn't stop him from using a portable male urinal and emptying it once he does reach a toilet. Once sealed he wouldn't even know it was there. I agree there should be better facilities en route, but that doesn't justify his laziness.

This is cultural.

Proper wild wees - not ideal but fine.
However, pavements, alleys and side roads are not wild areas.

It stars in childhood. Sometime ago there was a whole thread about poor boys who need to wee against trees on school run. School run. They cannot walk 15 minutes between one building fitted with toilets to another.
Girls who have may already experience UTIs are told to wait.

My neighbours's son likes to pee on their drive way. Just because.
Simone de Beauvoir wrote about it extensively in The Second Sex.
Men have bigger bladders, storage lees water in body cells, and are not affected by ovarian cysts and pregnancies. Yet, it is always men who have to piss all over.
Doesn't matter city center or motorway.

I have seen:
a man peeing on a bin - right by the pub doors, man peeing on the middle on the pavement - opposite the pub he just left, taxi driver filling in bottle by the pavement where women were passing by - by the train station with open public loos, teenagers peeing by the wall of someone's house - in the park, with open, free of charge public loos.

In Germany, I saw bunch of men peeing against the wall of public toilets because they did not want to pay 50 eurocents.

Men know it is not ok, they just do not care. I know fathers who see the problem, my own would challenge every man being so disgusting.
He is a very active 80 years old. Had his share of wild wees, I had too. Camping, treking etc. etc.
What was one of the first things I learnt about camping was to dig a hole and once you are done burry the evidence. However, facilities are much better nowadays anyway.

It's always men you see becuase women have to hide better.

I've peed in all sorts of places. If it's a choice between pissing on the ground or pissing my pants it's really not a choice. There are so few public toilets available nowadays it's disgusting.

Anyone that says you are being reasonable are just blessed with a clean beale of bladder and pelvic floor health.

Before babies I had a weak bladder. After a epitosmy and 4th degree tear my pelvic floor is shattered along with a prolapse bladder.

I can wee myself with no warning anywhere anytime. If I get to the lay by I am lucky and wil 100% use it.

Greater decorum needed in Dacorum 👍🙂

You have never been stuck on a motorway for hours & hours then, when the air ambulance landed !

1 man rushed to do a xxxx
100 men rushed to join him !

Yep I have done it too on the odd occasion
Too many road closures, accidents, bad weather

A few years ago, DC and I were stuck behind a traffic accident on a A road with nowhere to turn off, and took 2 hours to go 2 miles. Luckily we didn't have to go, but I don't judge the people who did.

When I posted this I really didn’t express myself well. Yes, like everyone else I have been caught short. The AIBU was referring to open lay-bys within 3 miles of a Services where men (specifically men) can regularly be seen taking a p@££ and consequently such lay-bys become extremely unpleasant. Not about the desperate circumstances of being in a long traffic jam or in need but nowhere to use within a reasonable distance. Extenuating circumstances aside I don’t think IABU to want people to not urinate in public areas. Including lay bys on A roads.

Are you really hanging around at laybys that often that this is an issue for you? There is a reason why it's a lot easier for a man to take a quick wee at the side of the road.

@Eagle2025 hanging around no, driving past, yes. Seeing one or two men urinating pretty regularly. Doesn’t bother me in the moment but when I too need to use a similar lay-by (dispose of rubbish, use my phone, check some notes - I drive long distances for work) and find it stinks of urine then I find my objection forms.
blimey, this thread has really brought out some interesting ways of thinking- yeah, course I spend my life hanging around in lay-bys 🙄

Ok the few moments when you get out the car to walk to the bin then yes you might notice it. Maybe instead of checking notes in laybys just check them when you get to the town/city you are visiting. Personally I dont like spending any longer than necessary in laybys due to the danger due to the speed of the traffic passing. If you say the men in question should drive on to the nearest services then why dont you.

We can talk about anti-weeing bylaws when there are far more public loos.

And when service areas stop putting the loos right in the depths of the buildings, so you have to walk past the overpriced tat.

Same as covert urban weeing. Is there unseen CCTV? Am I being watched? Will that fox report me?