@ToWhitToWhoo
>>>I am sorry for your loss. But people should not feel guilt-tripped into obeying everyone's, or even every family member's, demands. because they could die tomorrow. Any of us could die tomorrow. It doesn't mean that we all need to be doormats.
Don't be so over precious. It 's not being 'guilt tripped' into an unreasonable demand.
It's a dad wanting as a one-off to celebrate a special birthday in a particular way. It's not demanding that someone is giving up their life for your own convenience. This is the kind of thing that plays on your mind after death - those kind of things that you did or didn't do - to be kind to another person when it really mattered to them.
If you think that voluntarily putting yourself out on one occasion to make someone you love happy is being a doormat you really need to see a psychiatrist and work on your own self confidence and self-centredness.
Doormat? Demands? Jesus.
The selfishness of people today is eyewatering.
>>>That is most insulting. You don't know me; you didn't know my relationship with my parents. I adored my parents.
Your reply is all about your relationship with your parents which is absolutely NOTHING to do with what I wrote. I never mentioned your relationship with your parents. Where did that come from? You are obviously highly highly sensitive and hair triggered here.
What I was saying was that your previous reply (you banging on about not feeling "guilt tripped" into OBEYING (?!? wtaf) demands (WTA more F) because I had said to the OP at least think about how you might feel if it was a last birthday/parent may die ) - when we were talking about a request (<<<see that there, a request not a command to be obeyed, not a demand) to attend a special birthday (you know a once in a life time thing - you are only 60/70/80/90 once) as a one off that might be difficult for whatever reason -
that your reply was a ridiculous, self-centred and completely disproportionate approach and indicative of a seriously troubled world view. How you could see my previous comment as GUILT TRIPPING tripping someone into OBEYING DEMANDS (again, a request to attend a special birthday) is truly bizarre. It's a one time request for a nice thing that unfortunately involves situation that may cause discomfort to the OP for a couple of nights.
Your latest reply going on about your own relationship with your parents is nothing to the point - and even more bizarre.
You are derailing OP's thread which is about her question - not your relationship with your parents.
I'm not going to reply further to this because it is derailing but honestly your second post just amplified what I thought in the first place.
It is a kind thing to do to support a parent's wishes for a one off birthday if you possibly can tough it out, even if it's less than ideal for you, and to suggest that this is about obeying demands is very self-centred. To see anyone elses request as 'a demand' to be 'obeyed' shows than your world view is all about your own wishes trumping all and anyone encroaching on you is a demanding guilt tripper.
I'm bowing out now of this because I shouldn't even have bothered to respond to this ridiculous response in the first place.