to think that telling 5 yo's if they do not behave they will go to the naughty school or home is child abuse?

[LeilaAndLeo]

My parents used to say this to me when I was a young child and DD aged 5 has just told me that Granny (my mum) has told her and my niece also 5 this. I also remember my Mother saying to me "if you don't eat your dinner, I will phone the homes" .

I really cannot get to grips with my parents generation at all. Who would say this to children?

It is just as bad as smacking-would never even consider it.

I have heard this one used before. I cringe when I hear people say it, must be so hurtful for a child to hear. Ask your mum not to say it in the future.

This is a threat that can not be followed through, it will just teach your child that granny's full of crap threats that are not carried out. Your dd is less likely to listen to her once she has worked this one out. God help your mum. She'll get no respect.

I suppose your right avenanap but it's still cruel to say those things don't you think?

I have a friend of a friend(!) who swears by pretending to call the police to get them to take her 4 year-old DD away or just starts to pack her DD's bag because "THEY are coming for her". Yes, there are many lovely parents out there!

Absolutely. I hate it when people say this to their children. I used to work in a shop, I'd overhear people calling their kids stupid or useless. It made my blood boil!

that's awful FairyMum.

They might think they get away with behaving like this to their children when they are small, because there is little they can do at that age. But children remember how they were treated when they get older and I think will hold it against their parents later in life. Its easy to bully a child.

I remember my grandmother telling me, aged 7, that she would take me to a children's home and swap me for 'a nice little girl who does want her hair washed'.

As a young child you still believe your parents view of the world.

It's a cruel and awful thing to tell a child.

My mam said this all the time to my sister (not me, i was a 'good' girl )

She still laughs about it now - my sister that is.
I don't think she ever believed her, not even when mam rang them up (with her finger pressed down so that the call never connects).

Its certainly not something that i would ever say to my dc's but pretty sure that my sister would never consider it to be 'child abuse' ...

I also used to work in a shop and once overheard a woman say to her DS, "Behave, or the shopkeeper over there will come and smack you".

I wanted to shout out, "No, I bloody well wont!"

This kind of threat is lazy (grand)parenting, imo.

You should tell her not to use threats like this.

My parents used to say the same. And even went as far as driving my sister and I miles to an old farm, and telling us we were at a children's home.
i don't remember how we felt at the time or how old but i would have been under 8.
Found out that it was just up the road when it only took Dad 5 mins to get home.

yabu
we had aunt aggie. (she didn't exist) ir I was naughty I would be told I would have to go and live with her.
child abuse ffs get a grip

I don;t think the threat of boarding school works on kids after Harry Potter, does it?

My Mum used to 'ring' the home and ask them to come and get me.
I would be crying and shaking begging her not to.
Would never do it to my kids was tooo horrible.
I am a police officer and when I was in uniform I used to get so cross with parents saying 'Look she will take you away if you are naughty'
I used to say ' No I will take you away if you tell your children lies like that again.'
Morons.

My mum thinks its OK to say to my 10 month old niece that 'you will go to the naughty girls home' when she won't do as she says! FFS she is 10 months old and can't even talk never mind understand what she means, I told her last time I heard it that it is unacceptable.

She also thinks there is nothing wrong with smacking 'as it never did you any harm', hmm, well yes it did Mum, I would never smack my daughter as I can still remember you doing it to me in front of a shop full of people!

I have told her that she should never talk to my daughter like that and if she ever lays a finger on her we are finished.

tortoise! That's awful. I used to work in a hospital, one mum told her daughter to be quiet or she'd get the nurse to give her an injection. Bitch! the poor kid was petrified. It took me ages to calm her down.

Surely it is not right to say to a 5 yo " if you don't behave you will go to the naught School/Home" plus my Mum uses to say " if you don't eat your dinner you will go to the naughty home forever" How bloody cruel is that?

Readig this thread, it does make me chuckle reading about all the parents calling "the home". Not really funny I know....

That's a great response Double bluff!
I'd love to say that to evil parents! It is mental cruelty to say you will be taken away, terrifying for children. You couldn't say that to an adult in a work place!

I like that Double bluff.

A friend of mine grew up in Yorkshire when Peter Sutcliff was killing women, and her mother used to threaten that she'd be put out of the house for the ripper to find her!

On a lighter note

My dad used to claim he was going to take all 3 of us back to the hospital for a refund.

I've told my 8 yr old that i'm sending him to boarding school if he doesn't behave.

He knows that its a joke, I've only ever said it when he is being a little cheeky (not really naughty iykwim) & last time I threatened boarding school he said - No you can't mum, you can't afford it!

Not child abuse IMO, just a bit of fun!

I tell dd I am going to go and buy a new dd(did it with ds) they know they are loved to bits(just as I did) and find it very funny.

Glad i'm not the only child abusing monster on here 2shoes