To think men prefer pale skin??

[Anastasia2]

Hi just a question to gather some opinions. Me and my friend went into the sauna this morning . A group of women were discussing fake tan & how it's useless as alot of men they've dated prefer lighter skin anyway..
My friend piped up - usually very opinionated and loud and said she's shocked as she's so pale and feels like next to me she looks ill.
(I am ethnic and my skin is a medium.brown shade)
Women proceeded to say about men actually prefer lighter skin, that its human nature and goes back to the eighteenth century.. i thi k these women were demographicallytaling about white males in their late 30s middle class as this seems to be the majority in the club were members at...Next thing a few men came into the sauna & they all got involved..they also said they neither preferred it they just didn't prefer "darker skin" it was a very uncomfortable conversation as I was the only one of colour 😂 but it did get me thinking if its true ..any thoughts?

Don't men like clear good skin no matter the shade? Good genes.

The paler the skin the more blemishes are obvious. Blemishes are not so visible in darker or tanned skin.

It’s societal conditioning for big business profits. I come from a SE Asia country and the amount of skin whitening products out there is frightening. Even there, we are conditioned to think fair skin is better. But here, beauty companies push tanning products as majority of people are pale and they won’t make any money pushing skin lightening. All at the expense of women’s self esteem.

@Anastasia2, be proud of your skin colour. I’ve never had a shortage of suitors. And no one has ever said anything derogatory about my skin colour or they will be out faster than they can say trash! To each his own!

I've met men who are attracted to women of all skin toned but never met one that like fake tan

I think men prefer natural ( or rather what appears natural).
But generally I would say darker skins are viewed as more attractive than the really pale. It used to be men prefer blondes but I don't think that's true really. Men are superficial creatures though.
What I have come across from a female though was a desire to only marry a blonde blue eyed man ( same as her) because she wanted blonde children. Now that I did find slightly shocking especially as she was so open about it even talking to friends of various ethnicity s. She literally just wanted blonde children. I have not come across that from a man.

Thanks
I'm glad posters are picking up on the racist undertones as it kind of felt that way tbh hence why I posted it on here to make sense of it 🫤. The club we are at and area situated in is majority white..the women having the convo were early 50s so I suppose there could have been a bit of subtle racism. But when the group of men came in and started agreeing just really confused me as they're always pleasant to me so then I had to question myself that maybe they just genuinely had a ppint/preference lol.

You sat in a sauna as the only brown person and everyone talked about how they preferred pale skin? Ofcourse people can prefer what they like but the way this went just seems really mean. I wouldn’t be wanting to go back to that sauna with those people.

Yep. I have Asian family who abhor dark skin and revere people with lighter Asian skin. Roots definitely in racism and ‘class’.

Really?? Who cares?

Anyway I am happy that my (very!) pale white husband chose an Asian wife. Our kids are olive-skinned and don’t burn in the sun; we joke that he only married me for the melanin.

There aren't racist undertones. It's overt racist.

About racism? Hopefully everyone.

Really?? Who cares?
Well, in this case, the poor newly-single, dark-skinned lady who had to sit there while a bunch of at best insensitive, at worst racist tossers told her that men prefer paler skin.
For what it's worth, OP, I think it's bollocks!

One of my friends is Japanese and she has told me she’s dark like a farmer and seen as unattractive in her culture because of it.

I thought tanned, or better still, naturally dark skin, was the fashion. Pale may have been all the rage in the eighteenth century, but it's been out of fashion since about 1950s, surely!!??!! Otherwise, why do sunbeds and fake tan sell so well?

As a mixed race woman I've found that black men want to date me and white men want to sleep with me. Fetishism and colourism. Of course not all men, but it has been a theme throughout my life.

This 100%. What an appalling conversation on so many levels.

A fake tan is IMHO a serious ROFL job.

the women having the convo were early 50s so I suppose there could have been a bit of subtle racism.

I’m not sure what this bit means? It sounds a bit like you think women in their early 50s are more likely to be racist and if it does I’m really interested to know if this is your experience.

(full disclosure I’m in that age range and don’t recognise this in my friends and I but would really like to be open minded enough to reflect on that if your experience is different)

Sorry if I've misunderstood you but you are saying some men will want to "sleep" with you as you are "mixed race."? If that is what you believe, I just find it incredible.

Ask any woman of any colour, any build, almost any age - chancers will say anything to sweeten a woman for their desires. Trust me, I've met many men and they will say anything to sweeten you up!

Shocker
I am black and my husband is a handsome tall white male.
He says he likes his women black- darker the berry sweeter the juice he says…
men like who they like.

I'm dark skinned and mixed race and find that younger people tend to be less racisy. People are getting less racist as a whole. Of course, though, the vast majority of people of any age are not racist.

If nothing else I think it's pretty thoughtless and rude to say this when someone with darker skin (be it their natural skin colour or fake tan) is within earshot. Wouldn't you worry about hurting their feelings?

Who knows if it's true. I'm sure some people don't like fake tans, some people associate paler skin with a 'better class' and some people are just racist. Hopefully to the majority of men it doesn't matter.

Fake tan no, but I know plenty of men who like darker skinned women and say so.

It isn't incredible. Just regular old fetishization. Happens to east Asian women a lot. It is very real. Happens in the black community too. I've been called a 'lighty' many times in quite a sexual manner. Comments like 'oooh I've never slept with a black girl before but always wanted to try it'. Etc.

Countless men are like this, they like what they like. And some men, shock horror, don’t judge a woman on her colour but rather on her personality and character.