To veto DH taking baby out on push bike?!

[Amidying]

We have a 19 month old son. DH has got it in his head that at some point in the future, he is going to take DS out on his push bike with one of those seats that go on the back of a bike! Now he hasn’t specified what age DS would be but it would be pre-school age by the sound of it. I have said no way will I allow it as it’s not safe. This is not an essential mode of transport either, so I totally understand that for some people there is no choice but to travel this way with their child, but we have 2 cars! This would be to ride a short distance on the road to our local park or beach which is about 10 mins, but I still can’t get onboard with the idea.

I said to him: We have just spent £300 getting the safest car seat we could afford and you want to take him out on a push bike before he can even ride a bike himself?! He reckons I am being the overprotective mother and it will teach him road safety and help him learn how to ride a bike responsibly. I reckon he is insane and we are at a standoff.

His argument is that his dad did it with him when he was little and it’s one of his earliest happy memories, which is all lovely but we have come a long way safety wise since then. When I was a kid people used to smoke next to me, car seats weren’t a thing, my cousins and me used to pile into car with some of us in the footwells! So where does it end? We have to move with the times surely?! I would prefer to teach DS to ride when the time comes and when he reaches the right age he can do a road safety awareness course or something, I dunno. I hadn’t really thought about it because for me it’s way off into the future!

UABU= chill sista, let them ride
UANBU= its insane and unsafe

😀

I had times when taking neighbours child or friends of my children where I had 2 in the trailer and one on the seat. They were happy days. Kindergarten days sadly long gone now though

There are lots of reasons not to do this including the vulnerability of children in relation to a car. But why on earth would anyone cycle round London with a child breathing in all the fumes I cannot imagine.

Yabu, children around the world travel on bikes. Having a safe car seat for long distance fast roads doesn't mean you can't nip to the park on a bike. Mine travelled on mine

My kids have been in bike seats since they could hold their heads up with lids on. They love it.

Mischance - the fumes are worse in a car

YABU. You are happy to transport your child by car, what if you had an accident ? Many millions of children have been on the back of their parents bikes.

I've done this all mine from 12 months. We had all the safety gear and they absolutelu loved it. I planned routes to avoid busy roads, didn't go in the dark etc. You can also get a mini motor bike style helmet fitted to protect their face as well as head. In 10 years of cycling to school we've never had an accident.

My children are all really proficient bike riders and we kept another car off the road. I wish more people would do it. It would keep the roads safer.

If everybody drives their kids everywhere then the safety situation gets worse and the climate is f*&Ked. As more people cycle there's a bigger voice campaigning for safe cycling routes. If everyone cycles when they can then motorists on short journeys become the minority and they do (proven in toher countries) modify their behaviour.

@Amidying when you dc are 10/11/12/13 and out on their bikes alone would you prefer that the majority around them were cycling or driving.

Go with it, let your dh be part of the change.

Yes, and on a bike you can go through parks, along towpaths and go places further away from car fumes too. I don’t think people realise just how much children are exposed to car fumes in the back of cars or in school playgrounds from so many people driving their kids to school “because it’s safer”

Have you thought of a tag along bike that is like half a bike with pedals that attaches to your bike under the seat? They are great for this age group and means that you don't risk them going off independently or struggling to keep up.

We picked ours up from the local recycling centre for pennies as for some reason they're frequently offloaded there

I agree with you op, it’s danger for danger’s sake. There’s absolutely no protection on a bike and an accident can easily happen to the best of cyclists. It’s unfair on drivers to put them in the position of essentially caring for your child out on the road.

19 months? Completely bonkers. I'm a non driver and cycle everywhere btw. Had a few scrapes....but I'm an adult.

I really wanted to do this but DP vetoed it! He felt it was too dangerous. (We live in London.) You are not alone OP!

Not all fun would be off limits. Just the ones that involve my DC at a busy junction on the back of a pushbike 🤷🏻‍♀️

Maybe you and your dh could join a local campaign asking for safer cycle routes - there is bound to be one.

If we have an accident there is the added bonus of the steel structure of a car as protection. He is also in a rear facing car seat. That is a lot more protection than being on a bike!

There really isn’t any other route from where we live. It’s hard to explain but it’s really just this one road because everything else is houses and peoples gardens.

Never heard of this but will have a look. Thanks!

Unpopular opinion by the looks of this thread but I agree with you OP. My brother was almost killed by a car on his bike (riding forward on a straight road and a car crossed the road into his path). On cycle tracks I wouldn't mind but regardless of how careful your DH was on a road, the damage a car could cause to a young child is huge.

I had DS ( and then Dd) on Weerider between my legs from 9 months in London- completely normal. Is your DH a competent cyclist ? Average spped of London traffic is something like 8mph, I was normally the fastest thing on the road.

At least I know I’m not completely mad for thinking this! I do want him to learn road safety eventually. I just am in no rush for it to be this early while he is still so young and vulnerable. When he is older he will be doing ‘dangerous’ things anyway e.g climbing, swimming etc but he’s nowhere near that stage yet. He’s only just learnt how to walk fgs 😂

Never ever in a million years would i let DP do this with any of my children - no way and no how (unless off road of course).

I trust him, but i do not trust any other road users (as i do not know them).

We used one of these and I'm comfortable with it. It's very obvious to a driver that there's a child in the carrier and they are more careful. I'm less keen on the seats designed to go on a cross bar/front handles for a very small child as they are completely invisible from behind.

Only thing is that kids are bleddy heavy so it was a fleeting phase. Neither of us wanted to use a trailer thing - too low down and too much pollution where we lived but it might be suitable for you.

We used three wheeled scooters to go everywhere with the kids - up to 3 miles in distance?. Once they are up and running you can all get places fast with you power walking or even scooting yourself.

DH is a competent cyclist but my main worry is the other drivers. If the roads had 8mph slow moving traffic that’s one thing but the roads round here are not congested but have a steady flow of cars. Speed limit is 30 but sadly a lot of people speed. I do wish we had more speeding restrictions. On our road alone we had 3 accidents last year where drivers have gone into parked vehicles on the side of the road, and that’s on a straight road!

Are you kidding?! YABVU! Biking with kids is perfectly safe, where I live thousands of kids smaller than that are commuted every day! I ride more carefully with DC on the bike and ride very defensively in traffic. I live in a big city and lived in London before. Obviously get yourself a Yepp seat and a helmet for the kiddo but he’ll be fine. I thought you were going to say an actual baby under 6 months or something ( too young to wear a helmet).