To refuse to travel at 20 weeks pregnant

[Kofifi]

I have been put forward to attend an important event for work in San Fransisco, when I will be 20 weeks pregnant. I find these events exhausting at the best of times and am really dreading the idea of doing it pregnant. Especially with the long travel (16hr) involved.

I was planning to tell work that I'm pregnant after my 12 week scan next week. And I ideally want to use it as a reason to say I don't want to do any long haul trips.

But everywhere I google it says there's no reason I can't travel at 20 weeks. And so I'm worried they'll make me go anyway.

Aibu to think I should be able to opt out?

You can acquire maternal diabetes during pregnancy as well.

You no she has to work when she gets there right? She said she finds the events exhausting.

I think it depends on the person and the pregnancy. I felt pretty well at 20 weeks, but wouldn’t have fancied this in either the very early days or very late pregnancy (not that you can fly at the end anyway).

I think I would definitely ask to be flown in business class though- bearing in mind this is for business. I wouldn’t fancy a long economy class flight when pregnant.

She's complaining about the travel adding to it, but the travel isn't a big deal. But if she doesn't think she can work while 20 weeks pregnant, then that's a different issue.

Hey OP I'm pregnant too and wouldn't travel for work at 20 weeks.

Are you on midwife or consultant-led care? Do you have any health conditions which increase your risk of blood clots? This alone would rule out the travel.

I'd recommend you speak to a doctor about risks of travel in pregnancy - GP may agree to write a fit note indicating you should avoid long-haul travel due to your current condition (and I mean how YOU are feeling in yourself, not just being pregnant).

Have a safe pregnancy x

It’s a little odd that you can’t understand the combination of events. 16 hours travelling uncomfortably while pregnant with the increased risks of DVT, jet lag, long days that she finds exhausting when not pregnant at event followed by the return 16 hour journey all in one week. Away from her partner and to a country that has stupid laws around abortion right now.

Any decent employer won’t mind her sitting it out when others are happy and able to go. You being a pregnant martyr working 14 hour shifts at 35 weeks pregnant doesn’t mean OP is wrong to ask not to go. Typical mumsnet extreme poster

If you're going on a long haul flight to the US when pregnant then insurance has to be cast iron to pay for any medical complications that may arise, which could amount to over £100,000.

That person will have to be registered with a doctor and midwife.

You simply cannot go simply because you believe that pregnancy isn't an illness and you're not disabled. It doesn't work that way.

I think if you don't want to go it's fine to ask, I know there's technically no reason for you not to go but I wouldn't have been keen at 20 weeks either, I was quite nauseous all through both my pregnancies and had SPD so would have struggled to be on my feet all day and walking through airports. Plus there's the increased risk of DVT from flying. Talk so them and see, I doubt many managers would force a pregnant employee to do an overseas trip if they don't have to

I’m just going to assume you are drunk because your posts make no sense.

I thought same as you

Well @TeaKitten I'm just going to assume that you are struggling to understand simple posts that a person with average intelligence would understand.

I just think this would really be leaning out if you’re healthy. I had hg and I flew to Australia at 26 weeks with my first, I was better by then and it wasn’t an issue.

YANBU I didn’t travel abroad during any of my pregnancies to avoid any risk of hospitalisation abroad. Like yoh I have tough pregnancies and for me the sickness and nausea continues well into 2nd trimester. Also with the whole craziness about abortion in the US at the moment I wouldn’t risk travelling to the US at all.

Martyr? You mean doing the job I was paid to do? The type of job millions of pregnant women do because the world doesn't just stop when you are with child. And what does being away from her partner have to do with anything? She's not a child. She's not ill. She's just pregnant.

No, it won't. I am am midwife and I have written certificates advising against travel for women at 20 weeks due to hyperemesis, pregnancy-induced high blood pressure, or specific risks of preterm labour or previous DVT, but I won't write them just because someone thinks she will be "too tired" at 20 weeks. As another poster said, tiredness will not improve later in pregnancy or when the baby is here. A medical certificate is written under the responsibility that it is true and accurate. I take mine very seriously.

We get it, you slaved away for 14 hour shifts while almost full term so anyone can do it. Got it, well done you 👏👏👏

Also she’s not expecting the world to stop, she’s not even expecting not to travel. She’s wanting to avoid long haul travel in pregnancy when she’s confident someone else will want to do it, I think the world will carry on regardless of the result to be honest.

If she was being very sick, that would be noticeable already. It would be stupid to lie about it.

She's not ill. She's just pregnant.

Fully agree. The world has gone mad.

Oh I’m sorry, is this not an open forum where people can reply to other people’s posts at leisure?

Fuck off with your comment policing

Surely they can't make you go. They can't know how your pregnancy is going and they can't discriminate you based on your pregnant status. Tell them you're pregnant, then wait a bit and tell them you can't go. They shouldn't need to ask the details but you could tell them you are pissing yourself every half an hour. There are so many possible symptoms to being pregnant.also being in a plane gives you radiation.

🤣🤣🤣

Why isn't the travel a big deal? No matter how great I'm feeling before a flight, I'm practically ill with exhaustion at the other end

@HollyKnight but the travelling is a big deal for me. Having to sit all day is part of the issue.

You working a 14hr shift has no relevance to what I'm talking about. But since you went there there, I would easily take being on my feet for 16 hrs a day over two 16 hr flights and adjusting to 8hr timezone changes twice in one week.

Last time I went to San Francisco I had to queue for 90 minutes at immigration. It was chaos, not sure why they had so few desks open. I wouldn't have fancied that whilst pregnant.

I had straighforward pregnancies but wouldn't have done a long haul flight for work at 20 weeks pregnant. Even commuting to London and working was a lot more tiring than usual.