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Original poster

For a billion quid tax free would you...

187 replies

LindaHamilton · 27/02/2024 20:04

Just some funny escapism we played at work today, please don't take this thread seriously or go pc on me, it's just fun... You can say yes to them all or individually give a yes/no and why.

`1. Go on Jeremy Kyle with your family (no kids under 18), it's all scripted but it's utter humiliation and you can never tell any1 it was all fake. It's going to be really dramatic and memorable. So think really humiliating stuff like you and your mum are fighting over a 17 year old lover and you and your mum/sister having to be restrained in a physical fight...

2... Organise a massive family gathering (no kids allowed) with all your friends for a birthday and humiliate yourself...think dancing on floor and doing Britney by wearing a short skirt and nothing under and flashing your boobs, trying it on with all the men there, trying to do dirty dancing on the floor and so on totally disgracing yourself. If anybody tries to stop you then you make a huge Eastenders style scene. Again utter humiliation and you can never tell anybody except your husband/partner it was for money.

3... Do a porno.

4.. Spend 3 years in jail.

5...Move to USA with your partner and kids/grandkids and never being allowed anymore contact with parents/siblings/friends ever again. You can say goodbye to them but no contact ever again.

6...Not be allowed to see your kids for 1 year, they are well looked after but 0 contact for a year.

7... Write a really homophobic/racist/misogyny/ misandry /anti semitic and so on status on social media and never being allowed to say you did it for the money.

OP posts:
Original poster
LindaHamilton · 27/02/2024 21:59

LaPalmaLlama · 27/02/2024 20:47

I'm thinking something like fraud as not that long a sentence so it probably wouldn't be social suicide.

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Yea the thing you are jailed for or people think you are jailed for is not any heinous one. More like fraud or stealing from employer.

OP posts:
NonoLePetitRobot · 27/02/2024 22:00

LindaHamilton · 27/02/2024 20:19

The whole point of the Jeremy Kyle one is that it's all scripted to make you and your family seem very tabloid trashy. You would be made interesting.

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But hardly anyone would know who we were 😃

Original poster
LindaHamilton · 27/02/2024 22:03

NonoLePetitRobot · 27/02/2024 22:00

But hardly anyone would know who we were 😃

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They would by the end of it the script and performance would be so memorable albeit for all the wrong reasons. It would be the 'reality television' moment of the century that would be streamed globally. Think in the league of viewership and popularity something like the friends finale episode.

OP posts:
Antelopevalleys · 27/02/2024 22:05

6 I’d do for free 😅

PeloMom · 27/02/2024 22:08

Does 5 have to be the US? I wouldn’t do any of the others but I’m estranged to most of my family so getting a nice sum of cash for it is just a nice bonus 🤣

NonoLePetitRobot · 27/02/2024 22:09

LindaHamilton · 27/02/2024 22:03

They would by the end of it the script and performance would be so memorable albeit for all the wrong reasons. It would be the 'reality television' moment of the century that would be streamed globally. Think in the league of viewership and popularity something like the friends finale episode.

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And it would be more or less forgotten about within a week; sooner if another scandal came along. In a few years it would be almost totally forgotten.

E.g. without looking it up (I had to look them up myself to get their names) do you know who any of these people are:

Brian Tolver
Rod Ponton
Robert Kelly

(They've all gone viral on the internet within the last 7 years).

SpongeBobSquarePantaloons · 27/02/2024 22:10
  1. Yes
  2. Yes
  3. Yes
  4. No - no amount of money could make me do that
  5. No - the idea of living in the US is hell imo
  6. I don't have any kids
  7. No
potato57 · 27/02/2024 22:11

Yes to all.

You have to make it only a million or actually have some bad things in there to make it difficult.

Stompythedinosaur · 27/02/2024 22:14

1, 2 and 3 I would.

4, 5 and 6 I wouldn't.

7 is tricky, maybe?

StarDolphins · 27/02/2024 22:14

Yes to all of the 7 & yes to sex with Boris, Donald or Nigel

2 million for me!

Original poster
LindaHamilton · 27/02/2024 22:15

NonoLePetitRobot · 27/02/2024 22:09

And it would be more or less forgotten about within a week; sooner if another scandal came along. In a few years it would be almost totally forgotten.

E.g. without looking it up (I had to look them up myself to get their names) do you know who any of these people are:

Brian Tolver
Rod Ponton
Robert Kelly

(They've all gone viral on the internet within the last 7 years).

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I wouldn't agree it would be more or less forgotten in a week, Nasty Nik incident in BB1 was 24 years ago and it is still very remembered. Likewise the Jade Goody racism row on Big Brother got massive attention that people still remember and she became very famous from big brother alone.

OP posts:
TheEyesOfLucyJordon · 27/02/2024 22:15

No. To everything. My integrity's not for sale 😊

Original poster
LindaHamilton · 27/02/2024 22:16

SpongeBobSquarePantaloons · 27/02/2024 22:10

  1. Yes
  2. Yes
  3. Yes
  4. No - no amount of money could make me do that
  5. No - the idea of living in the US is hell imo
  6. I don't have any kids
  7. No

With a billion I'm sure you could have a great life on the Hollywood hills or in the Florida Quays...

OP posts:
DancesWithBadgers · 27/02/2024 22:18

I’d do all of it but then after I got the money i’d tell everyone it was for the money. Why? ‘cause i’m a billionaire now, rules don’t apply. 😏

Original poster
LindaHamilton · 27/02/2024 22:20

DancesWithBadgers · 27/02/2024 22:18

I’d do all of it but then after I got the money i’d tell everyone it was for the money. Why? ‘cause i’m a billionaire now, rules don’t apply. 😏

Telling people you did it for money probably wouldn't make several of them any better or rather it wouldn't restore your dignity. If anything it's probably better to say nothing and let them think you have mental illness.

OP posts:
AmaryllisChorus · 27/02/2024 22:24

Can't tell if I'm a coward or just not that bothered about money but I couldn't do any of them.

BarbieDangerous · 27/02/2024 22:25

I could do all of them except for 4, 5 and 6.

  1. I wouldn’t last 5 days in prison let alone 3 years.

  2. I’m not moving to the US and I’m definitely not cutting contact with friends, family etc.

  3. I couldn’t go one whole year without seeing my babies, defo not.

People that have said they can do 6 but not 7 have their priorities all messed up😂

Original poster
LindaHamilton · 27/02/2024 22:28

BarbieDangerous · 27/02/2024 22:25

I could do all of them except for 4, 5 and 6.

  1. I wouldn’t last 5 days in prison let alone 3 years.

  2. I’m not moving to the US and I’m definitely not cutting contact with friends, family etc.

  3. I couldn’t go one whole year without seeing my babies, defo not.

People that have said they can do 6 but not 7 have their priorities all messed up😂

The people who say they'd do 6 but not 7 are doing it for their kids really as a year won't do any great harm. But 7 is more tricky as it destroys your character and likely would have you and your family ostracised so the fallout is bigger...

OP posts:
SirVixofVixHall · 27/02/2024 22:34

No.
Possibly 7. Misandry .
None of the others, did mull over three as one could say a drink had been spiked and it would be so incredibly out of character for me that everyone would think that anyway.

ThirtyThrillionThreeTrees · 27/02/2024 22:36

No kids so 6 doesn't apply.

I don't think I could do 7 and 5 would be very difficult but if I could use the money for everyone I had left behind, I think I could square it off in my head.

Honestly if I was going to do any of the rest I might as well go all in....have the party, have the porno filmed while there given the behaviour anyway, go on Jeremy Kyle to deal with the fall out. Jail would be an ease to me after that.

Mounttidyflowers · 27/02/2024 22:40

ImnotadickheadIpromise · 27/02/2024 20:29

When I think of some of the sex I’ve had for free I’d be inclined to agree 🤣

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Just laughing so much you’ve made me smile after a rubbish day!

BarbieDangerous · 27/02/2024 22:43

LindaHamilton · 27/02/2024 22:28

The people who say they'd do 6 but not 7 are doing it for their kids really as a year won't do any great harm. But 7 is more tricky as it destroys your character and likely would have you and your family ostracised so the fallout is bigger...

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I disagree! Maybe it’s because my children are very young so I can’t imagine leaving them for 1 whole month let alone a year.

7 seems way easier to do as opposed to 6 imo

Parentofeanda · 27/02/2024 22:44

yes to all except 5.

Original poster
LindaHamilton · 27/02/2024 22:47

BarbieDangerous · 27/02/2024 22:43

I disagree! Maybe it’s because my children are very young so I can’t imagine leaving them for 1 whole month let alone a year.

7 seems way easier to do as opposed to 6 imo

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With 7 if there was a fallout between you and everybody you'd have a billion so could just move on and start somewhere else. It would highly unlikely be big news, just more so to the people you knew. Police might get involved though because of the slurs.

OP posts:
minou123 · 27/02/2024 22:50

I've got another one

For a billion quid, would you change your name permanently, forever and ever, to Mrs/Ms Fanny Bush?

You can never change your name back.