to think is gross / to be worried?

[listyle]

a friend of mine has been telling me for a while now she's suffering with smelling of body odour on her armpits even after showering.

She asked me do I ever smell after showering & I said no. She asked what am I doing different from her so i asked about her diet/what body wash is she using etc we got talking about shower routines and I explained I use a loofah and that I literally scrub my body from head to toe, and that I shower everyday & use deodorant afterwards as well as body lotion etc.

She was shocked , first of all that i shower everyday , she said she showers AT MOST 3 times a week and when she does shower she jumps in, rinses her body with water, whacks shower gel on her hands puts it on armpits and bum (nowhere else) , rinses that off and hops out (excepts for the days she washes her hair, she'll do that) and she'll only use a deodorant when she's bothered. I said to her "no wonder". I wanted to be as nice as possible. I explained that she needs to start washing her full body and washing armpits 2/3x and preferably with a loofah & ALWAYS use deodorant afterwards. She was like "but the issue is only my armpits I don't need to be putting body wash anywhere else I only wash my armpits and bum"

I was being so so nice to her but also trying to get the seriousness across and the importance of personal hygiene.

It's shocked me to be honest she's a close friend and she doesn't come across as dirty. I've never smelled anything bad off of her, she comes across as clean and presents herself well.

I feel a bit concerned is it mental health related? We're very good friends and I've never once thought she has bad mental health but I suppose it's not always visible.

She just seemed so shocked that I shower everyday. She couldn't wrap her head around that I use a loofah and I wash my arms/legs/belly button/back , literally everywhere. She literally only rinses with water, uses hands to wash armpits and bum and that's it. She said her showers are no longer than 3/4 minutes (unless washing hair which would make it 10 mins)

She also mentioned if she wants to shave she'll take a bath but won't put anything in the bath. Only put body wash on armpits and bum and when she rinses that off the suds will go into the bath.

She said she thought this was the norm and what most people did.

I don't know, I haven't stopped thinking about it all day. Am I crazy? If it was your friend would you be worried? I'm not sure if she took on what I said about what she should be doing. She seemed like it would be so much effort for her to do.

(I know she doesn't use mumsnet)

At my last workplace we had black toilet seats.
After one particular colleague had used the toilet there would always be obvious white flakes of dead skin cells on the seat.

Op’s friend needs to exfoliate regularly.

Somewhere in the middle is best
Your both at the extreme of normal

These posts make my skin crawl. So many people don’t shower daily 😳
There are a lot of orifices that can smell! Give them a wash ! The ones that sink wash too, rather than get in a shower. Unless you have a disability of some kind, it’s just lazy.
I appreciate that it can dry your skin etc etc but seriously how can folk get intimate hardly washing or go to work.

If your friend's issue is specifically that her armpits smell immediately after a shower as per your OP, then how do you think scrubbing her feet with a loofah or applying deodorant 10 minutes later after she's dried and moisturised etc will help??

Well that's not normal @SignoraVolpe. People don't usually visibly shed their skin.

That’s an AI generated response! How bizarre.

Could it be hormonal ? I started to get unpleasant sweat smell in perimenopause at certain times of the month.

People are getting AI to write their replies now? Wow.

I shower daily but I've never used a loofah in my life.

I more or less do what your friend does - perhaps more regular showers, but not necessarily every day. I don't smell, but have friends/family who'd tell me if I did, and then I'd change my routines. What I hope my friends WOULDN'T do is plaster personal information about me all over the internet, hoping people would agree about me being 'gross.' Congratulations on your thorough washing routine OP, but I think you have other things about yourself to think about.

I'm with your routine is OTT!

I wash everyday. Face and neck and under arms sometimes.

Shower 3 times a week. Wash hair twice a week and shave once a week in winter and twice in summer.

Showers are about 3-8 minutes long.

I do wash everywhere with exfoliating mitt and use a brush for my back.

I don't smell. I'm clean.

I use deodorant daily as well.

I've heard it's actually really bad to scrub everyday and remove with a loofah daily as removes natural oils from the skin.

YABU I only shower 3 times a week (since wfh). You should only shower each day if you work down a mine!
I do enjoy an all over scrub, with a cold blast at the end as it's invigorating and good for circulation. But never use products containing soap as this forces your body to produce more subaceous oil, which will smell of BO after a short time. So you should tell her to use an emollient wash like E45 shower cream. You won't need deodorant at all.
Never put product into a bath, it's a fast lane to thrush and cystitis.
No one says these things as it would cause the downfall of the bath products industry.

🤣🤣

A shower every other day is not 'hardly washing' ffs.

This is not rocket science. If she's worried that she smells after showering then she probably needs to wash herself more thoroughly. If she still smells after trying that then maybe she needs to see the GP.

She needs to use soap on her armpits. If I just use shower gel, then I'll smell not king afterwards. Soap is the key.

People who say they only wash their hair once a week, you can definitely smell if someone has dirty hair. And it will be dirty after almost a week. It has a distinctive smell to it.

When you all say loofah, do you mean a natural, grown from seed loofah or do the you mean a body puff thingy? One is great, will compost down, is naturally antibacterial if dried between use, the other is a germy lump of plastic.
Its a real Jack sprat situation. Op is going ott (but I bet she has lovely soft skin) and her mate is a bit slapdash, but isn’t smelly. You do what you want to feel clean. But ditch the plastic and shower gel.

@Lampzade

A clean ‘nutter’

Using a loofah or flannel isn't going to make you any cleaner as long as you wash properly with soap or shower gel.

My daughter has a range of disabilities, both physical and mental, and also skin so dry that as a baby she had to be wet wrapped. Showering /bathing dries her skin even more and needs a huge all over moisturising routine which is physically and mentally draining.
She cannot shower every day.
She is not gross
You are, however, judgemental and rude.

There's nothing wrong with the way she washes, it's better for her skin, but she should use a proper bar of soap to kill the bacteria that causes the smell and use deodorant every day.

It's because she doesn't wash daily or use deodorant. Not everything is due to peri menopause

@listyle how old is your friend? Body odour can be a very common symptom of the menopause and if it is her shower routine would not necessarily come into play

if she is at that age I would get her to see the doctors about other stuff

I don't think your routine is OTT OP. I think peoples washing routines vary from person to person, and your post indicates this perfectly.

Imo I think not washing everyday (even a short wash) is gross. I also think if you're friend did wash each day the BO likely wouldn't be an issue and she may even not need deodorant each day. Some people don't need deodorant. Others need strong deodorant. We are all different, some sweat some don't. I don't think it's a mental health issue, but that if your friend has chose to mention it the BO must be bothering her. Washing more would be the first step surely? Common sense!

Edit: spelling.

@Lucklin

These posts make my skin crawl. So many people don’t shower daily

If you genuinely feel this way then I'd say you possibly have more of a MH problem