What if you are not a Performance Parent but you have "THAT" kid?!

[PyongyangKipperbang]

On the back of the PP thread.
I have never been a PP but there was one time that I was probably thought of as one and I die at the memory.

I will preface this by saying that DD2 is/was officially gifted, she is an adult now and storming her way through her chosen career, she is just....yah know, clever! Very proud of her obviously but when she was a young child especially, she could be excrutiating to be the parent of! She is (Borg name) Three of Six, and she is the only one to do this to me!

We had been to France on holiday, nothing flash (saved for two years for a Keycamp job) but we all loved it. We arrived back at midnight and I took her and DD1 with me to Tesco next morning as we had bog all in. Both wanted to wear their Disney dresses (yes we did DLP but Parc Asterix was waaaaay better) and I had done all the driving in one day back from Paris, frankly I was too fucked to care. So me, Cinderella (10) and Snow White (5) are going around Tesco and Snow White decides she is only going to talk in French so it feels like we are still on holiday. Cute but frankly annoying, not least because she just seemd to pick up french easier than you or I can work out our new mobile phone. I played along as I speak French but really couldnt be arsed so tried to distract as you do "Who can find the baked beans first" and all that, DD1 played along as she was eye rolling too.

Then I think "Aha!!!!.....DD2, look some Pain au Chocolate like we had on holiday, shall we get some? You can get them and put them in the bag"

She said, top of her voice "OH NO MUMMY!!!!! THEY WONT BE ANYTHING LIKE THE ONES WE HAD IN PARIS!!!".

The ones we had in Paris were nice yes, but they were still from a fucking supermarket! And I only bought them because I got lost in the massive place and gave up as we were tight on parking!

Little arsehole got me side eye the whole fucking walk of shame to the checkout.

DD2 is now in her 20's and I have never thought that there is a decent way to not look like a dick parent in this scenario, apart from giving her a flick a thwart the earhole (Copyright Terry Pratchett) and tell her to stop being a twat!

Is there and I missed it?!

Should add that I adored her then and do now before anyone says I dont, and that this story is part of the family archive of "oh do you remember when" most of which relate to me!

Your post makes absolutely no sense and is pointless. Your DD is 20 now, this was 10 years ago so why are you still thinking about an absolute non-incident? She’s wasn’t being a ‘twat’, she was being a 10 year old and making silly comments as they all do.

This is just….strange?!

your children will all have their own personalities. End of.

It's nice you're so proud of your lovely daughter. She sounds as brilliant as you clearly see her as. You can convey that straight forwardly though, back handed compliments can wear down gifted kids, even as adults (talking from experience)

You sound insufferable.

I just don't care what random people think of my parenting or whether they think I'm being a performance parent or not.

You sound like you are a performance kid yourself? Not sure what the aim of the post is, or what the AIBU vote is about.
Is there a question? Humble brag/ brag?
Just a happy memory you wanted to share?

Well, I buy Pain au Chocolate from my local Asdas when I feel like stuffing my face, not because I'm stuck for options in Paris. I suppose it makes me a complete animal.

Also, does anyone know if you look like "one of those parents" if your children speak Albanian, or does it have to be French? Very confusing.

Weird way to brag about having some pain au chocolat in Paris but you do you boo

What? I don't get what your point is op.

Haven’t read the PP thread. I might be considered one as I talk out loud to my child in public. We enjoy having a laugh together.

You seriously think that talking to your* *own child in public is something out of the ordinary?! 🤣

The bit about Disney dresses (and the other theme park being better) sounds very snobby. Who cares if your kids are in fancy dress in a shop, that's an entirely normal thing.

OP you forgot to put lighthearted and everyone is obtusely stating they don't know what you're on about.
I got it, it was funny and on any other day a thread could have appeared here saying "stuff I heard in tesco the other day" and someone could have complained about how you performance parented your daughter about chocolate croissants.

I understood, it was funny. Lighten up everyone.

Tell me you're a performance parent without telling my you're a performance parent?

The comments🤣

I assume this was a lighthearted thread but I’m guessing this did not go the way the OP intended it too. I must say, I don’t quite understand your point OP or how it relates to being a performative parent but hey ho!

Why are posters being snippy?

I get your point OP.

My fake PP moment is at an airport with 3 DCs in the security queue for a flight to a bucket and spade destination on a low cost airline with all the other plebs.

DS aged 8 piped up loudly: "are we going first class today Mummy?"

We weren't.

Stemmed from an occasion when I had travelled on a plane for work with them and we had actually travelled first class paid for by my employer at the time.

Not sure I get the point either.

Also unsure why you sound almost apologetic for going to DLP, and had to shoehorn in how asterix world was much better.

I agree. I can’t understand why most of the posts on this thread are so mean.

I genuinely don't understand the OP, or the overly aggressive response to a fairly inoffensive comment from a child's statement, especially the walk of shame part.

Ignore the posters who are terminally incapable of seeing lightheartedness!
I thought your post was funny.
We used to do deliberate PP sometimes when my youngest three were small. We renamed them Ptarquin (pronounced Puh-tarkwin) Jocasta, and Aubrey (pronounced AwBerry) and went for it at full volume whenever the urge took us 😁
My fondest memory was at a glamping place - we were very budget, but experienced campers, surrounded by the NCT wannabes with two grands worth of inflatable tent, balance bikes handcrafted from sustainable wood, Hunter wellies and all the trimmings, but no idea of the reality.
I announced the three bird roast was rested, Mamma was about to carve, so could they come to the table, in my most strident tones, just after one of those five minute cloudburst thunder storms had wiped out half the site 😁😁😁 and I revelled in it!

😄 I thought the post was lighthearted too - maybe because we’re all awake at 4:30am some of us are not in a good mood! 😄

Walk of shame, 10 years ago?

What a horrible post.

Jeez, there are some humourless people around here!

Christ folks, lighten up.

I know where you're coming from OP - most of the eye rolling I've endured over the years has been as a result of language stuff - we live on the French/German border but I'm Scottish so there is a reasonable amount of chat from our kids about what is that in French, so and so's friend is coming over but she only speaks German etc etc and I know it sounds poncy to my Scottish family but for them it's normal to the point of boring, there's nothing to show off about.