To have asked man to stop helping?

[Mostlythesame]

Trying to park in a space today and a man started trying to help by waving me forward and then stopping me. But I found I was looking at him not the parking space and I asked him if he’d mind stopping because I was fine myself. He and his wife got really huffy! Surely I wasn’t unreasonable?

I personally appreciate it as I am self confessed a rubbish Parker, however I can imagine lots of normal women being totally frustrated/ angered by this. Mind you I did once see a woman trying to park her new car ?which I don’t doubt she wouldn’t have got there herself) however she was taking forever and a day” and so someone tried to help her (so traffic could move - however she ignored him and carried on - looking quite annoyed at the offer of help 🤷‍♀️

Some man tried to help me park in a massive space the other day which there was hint of a problem with. I opened the window and told him I could do it on my own and he got annoyed. Sick of it

My dad doesn't drive much now, he likes to critics my driving last week I was holding the gear stick wrong! (only had 1 accident in the 35 years I've been driving which wasn't my fault) and If someone let's me out he always waves thanks to them from the passenger seat it drives me mad!

Never had this happen to me before, I wonder why🤔😁

I was reversing into a space once and some people I work with were frantically waving from the side of me, like something was badly wrong. Of course I took my eyes off my REVERSING CAMERA and stared at them trying to work out what the problem was. I bumped into the wall behind.

they said they were trying to warn me the space was tight.

i know. I was perfectly fine watching it in the camera until they started making such a fuss!

Sensible adults work on the assumption that other adults are competent to go about their daily lives and that, if they need help, they will ask for it. A minority just like to interfere.

I have relatives who ask me if it is "clear left" when I am being driven by them, they know I used to drive but don`t bother now, they take my word and pull out, it is a trust thing I think, maybe you and FIL need to bond more?

I am small and blonde and often tow a trailer - so I get this a lot. Yep, always men and usually older men. If you ask them to stop helping they love taking time out of their day to stand and watch. Who knew watching a woman park was such an enjoyable spectator sport? Unfortunately for them, I am an excellent driver, so I always spoil their fun. But fear not, they can still find a way to patronise me, with a condescending ‘well done’ or ‘you’ve obviously done that before’. Well it’s my car and trailer - so no shit, Sherlock.

Is he an ex police driver? That’s not annoying

Random men often do this to my DP when he’s driving his HGV… that is fitted with cameras, alarms and all manner of mirrors, and it also talks to him!!
Doesn't stop men of a certain age from standing too damn close waving wildly at him and having no idea how an HGV works!!
My DDad had a habit of “helping” drivers… he’d never even passed his test!🙈

Oh lord, I had this not long ago. Not a parking space, but a narrow dead-end lane with multiple entrances close together and a blocked side turning. A works van and I were both trying to leave from different directions and had already had a conversation about how we were going to do it, when the local busybody decided to get involved - and yes, I know he is a busybody because he takes it upon himself to quiz anyone in the vicinity about what they're doing there, even if he's met them multiple times and knows exactly what they're doing there because there is only one thing they can be doing there!

He stood directly behind my car, doing the ridiculous air traffic controller arms. I got out and politely asked him to move. He said it was fine. I told him it wasn't fine because if I actually did what he was gesturing at me to do, I would run him over. He moved grudgingly, then stepped back as soon as I started moving. I had to ask him three times, and eventually tell him that I wasn't moving my car until he got completely out of my way, even if it meant we were there for the rest of the day. He moved, I reversed, and then he walked in front of me and tried to do the same thing to the van driver - who turned his engine off, folded his arms and glared at him until he moved.

A manoeuvre that should have taken about 30 seconds took about ten minutes because of his 'help.' And when I finally drove off, he did a gesture clearly intended to convey 'there you go, well done me.' I seriously considered going back to reverse over him.

Funny thing is that all these men who are so knowledgable about reversing seem incapable of doing it when you meet them on the country lane around here. Oh no, suddenly the woman is just fine to reverse half a mile down the lane so that they don't have to roll their massive manmobiles back two feet into a passing space.

I've just asked my DH, who holds both HGV and PSV licences if, when he's driving his own car, people ever try to help him park (we both reverse park as standard, he actually taught me how to, although I'd already passed my test before we met).

He said yes, they do and it's usually men of a certain age (his term was rude and more ageist).

On the other hand, I think it's maybe happened to me a couple of times in 30 years or so of driving and certainly not in the last 10 years or so.

I don't think this proves anything just anecdotal evidence to add to the debate.

Haha @TheBlueAndAmber I hadn't seen your post when I started mine. It shows it's not only women that men "of a certain age" do it to.

Had some twat do this when there was just no need and comments like ‘you could get a bus through there love!’

I bloody hate this!! I also once had a man run up to me at a petrol station when I was filling my car to tell me I was filling a diesel car with petrol. My car was petrol and I'd filled it many times. He was quite insistent that that particular model didn't come in petrol. He walked away shaking his head at the "idiot woman" 🤬😡

Oh hush. She sounds perfectly competent.

I bet you have a tinkly laugh and think all women should be ladies. 🙄

100% this. ^ Men are really fucking me off this week. This forum is full of stories this week, about wanky, twatty, arrogant, misogynistic men mansplaining - and talking down to women. Just DO ONE men. Your opinion is not wanted. If we want your help, we will summon you! Capiche?! Otherwise. Keep your neb out.

I haven't had 'help' parking, but once when my car wouldn't start properly in a car park, an old man came over & told me what I needed to do. I told him I'd already tried that & it didn't work & so I was about to call the RAC. He just kept insisting I needed to do it, no matter what I said to him. So I gave in, did what he suggested, it didn't work & he walked away, satisfied. I then rang the RAC.🙄

Standard practise, same as someone getting out to assist in reverse parking..

Bah... Unsolicited advice is crap no wonder who it is from. Plenty of men in my life have had this from women over playing with their kids etc...

It would be nice if people just asked if help is needed rather than assuming their assessment of the situation is the best.

Example:

@PeggyPoggleshaw do you need my help in understanding how to behave when your disagree with someone?

My dad had a haulage business so I got my HGV licence to help him out from time to time. I can guarantee that every time I arrived at another business in my lorry, the men there on seeing that there was a ‘girl’ driving would stop working and congregate to watch me park. Their sense of disappointment was palpable as I parked this large artic perfectly and without incident.

My Mum!

92, nearly blind in one eye, not a lot better in the other. ‘Clear my side dear’ as we come up to junctions.

😂 is he an ex copper? My FIL does this all the time! Apparently it’s a driving thing a passenger in police vehicle would do during a pursuit!