to be fed up with homophobia on MN

[smittenkitten]

today there was the thread about being 'uncomfortable' with a secondary school telling kids it's OK to be gay. a short while ago there was a post about someone being freaked out by two women kissing on a bus.

calling it being 'uncomfortable' is still homophobia. we wouldn't tolerate racism on here - imagine "i'm concerned that my DC's school wants to say it's OK to be black". the OP would be rightly slammed, but instead the queers on MN have to put up with people defending bigotry saying that people are entitled to have a POV etc.

Freedom of speech does not include the right to victimise and marginalise others for their race, religion, sexuality, age or other irrelevant attributes. I don't think its unreasonable to want MN to be a safe space where we don't have to deal with homophobia.

aw, i do adore seeing spotty teens in the first flush of love having a right old snog (gay or straight, if they're 13 they're so cute and innocent it's GORGEOUS).

yorkshirepudding my dh is the same! He used to be pretty ignorant but he has changed his opinion over the years. What part of Yorkshire are you from? I'm from Bradford.

Well said Aitch,

I have seen both threads and thought they were inoffensive. The snogging on a bus one was clear in the OP and other posts that she would have felt the same about a hetero couple snogging. Plenty of people would. It probably made more of an impact because they were lesbians, and so it is unusual.

Giving their 12 year old dcs a formal talk on how it is ok to be gay would make lots of people uncomfortable. Fine to work it in to teaching, reassure the children that such feelings and urges were nothing to be ashamed of, but a formal talk would presumably involve explicit details!

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It is not okay not to be accepting of gay people.

But there is a world of difference between expressing discomfort at school policy on sex education and being homophobic.

Public displays of affection make people uncomfortable. Not me. But I don't see why people can't post about it, if only so they can see they are in the minority.

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I have nothing against public displays of affection, I have no problem with couples obviously in love and oblivious to the outside world. I am not offended by kissing. I just don't want to watch someone snogging the face off each other directly in front of me.

It is unfortunate if the OP felt offended by the choice of words/tone of some posts, but it is in no-one's interests to drive these kind of views underground. Far better and healthier to have it all out in the open where it can be discussed and challenged, and hopefully minds can be opened as a result. To illustrate, it seems as though the school talk poster was becomming aware that her 'discomfort' might mean homophobia, and she may now work through that.

There are plenty of things on here and in RL that offend me, and I say so. That is what freedom means. I'd much rather live in a society where we can be offended, challeneged, educated by, or laugh and reason with, each other than a society where we all live in fear of offending. Not that I think people shouldn't try to avoid giving offence, just that we shouldn't shy away from discussing difficult topics or views because they might do.

I'm not a prude honest

No, it's not ok not to be accepting of gay people.

KM I don't need to meet gay people to know that they are normal (althoug I know many, so I disagree with you there too. Just like I don't think you need to know fat people to know they are normal, or black people, or Pakistanis, or muslims, or jews, or short people. It's enough to know that they are humans to know that they are just like everyone else.

Teenagers do need to be made aware that gay is ok. That's not placing a value judgement on it.

I do think the OP is overreacting though. Two threads in two months isn't indicative of hobophobia on mn.

I haven't see it on here.
I would be happy if one of my children were gay and they all know that. We talk about it. It's important.

(And I like all public displays of affection when I see them)

I agree with Morningpaper.

Members should be able to post whatever they like, as long as they're prepared to accept the consequences.

People's views can only change through debate, discussion and education.

Exactly km, that's why it's a good thing if those people are encouraged to view gay as ok by their school, rather than just being told it's normal, if in their lives they have never met any gay people then it's not 'normal' to them is it?

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I think people have misunderstood what 'normal' is here. I mean normal to include different family set ups, feelings etc in everyday discussions and life rather than most people are gay.

Yeah but you'd hope any good school would do that anyway in a broader sense km.

One of my children is gay.

I started a thread about it.

I am over it now, but it was difficult to take at first.

Its not her problem, it was mine!

At least this one wont come home pregnant (removes tongue from cheek)

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