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Original poster

Has anyone ever given you some life changing advice?

314 replies

scottyhannah · 14/02/2024 16:47

My first ever boss told me to find my voice and do things with purpose.
It was a dig at the time as I was a shy little 17 year old but for some reason it stayed with me for the next 30 years and I still hear his voice butt into my head when I need motivation.
He would have no idea that his frustrated jibe would have helped make me who I am.

OP posts:
Moanranger · 15/02/2024 20:35

My grandmother said to me: “always have your own money”. Invaluable!

ToHellBackAndBeyond · 15/02/2024 20:35

No is a full sentence.

And, as I always tell my children, your life is yours and it belongs to noone but you.

Pommersy · 15/02/2024 20:40

Another one as treating yourself like you would a best friend and giving your ‘tomorrow you’ a present by doing dull jobs or things you are putting off now so ‘tomorrow you’ will be pleased.
Another one is another way of framing having to do dull or repetitive things such as thinking for example ‘I have to do the school run’ or ‘I have to do the food shop’ by changing ‘have’ with ‘get.’ Very bad English but makes me appreciate that I get to do the school run because I have children I dearly wished for. I get to do the shopping because we are lucky to have enough money to pay for it etc. I hope this makes sense. It sometimes makes me feel more grateful but not always!

holdmydrinks · 15/02/2024 20:43

"Buy cheap, buy twice" - this has proven right again and again for me so I try and buy more wisely now.

"Raise your bar" - from a therapist, in relation to the expectations you set for others around you and the behaviour you're willing to tolerate, particularly in relationships. It's taken a long time for me to hear this.

GonnaBeYoniThisChristmas · 15/02/2024 21:01

This is a great thread.

In work life - if you find a problem, whether of your own making or someone else’s, tell your boss and anyone else who needs to know and get to work on the solution. It will take you far.

In personal life - feel the fear and do it anyway and always remember how lucky you are (even if things are tough, try to find gratitude where you can).

Gettingcolder · 15/02/2024 21:02

I have read the whole thread and love some of these. As a young manager getting impatient and frustrated with juniors in my team making mistakes, misunderstanding their work, or just taking too long, I was told by an older colleague: "If they could do the work as well as you, they would all be competing for your job and pay grade". It was a much needed reminder to be more patient with others at work and I believe it was a turning point in my life as shortly after this I decided to become a teacher.

Anycrispsleft · 15/02/2024 21:02

"This organisation rains shit down on everybody. My job as your manager is to be the umbrella."

I've tried since then as a manager and a parent to be the umbrella 😁

baileybrosbuildingandloan · 15/02/2024 21:09

From a man, who was my boss at the time, to me as a single Mum of 4.
"Always, always set your bar very very high with men. Because 75% of them will do their best to come in way below it. And if it's set low to start with, then you'll accept crap you don't deserve".
He was aware he'd be no good as a partner- liked to spend. Didn't want commitment. Gambled etc. but he was a good man, who recognised that how he lived would not make a good partner. So he stayed singled.
One of the kindest bosses I've ever had.

baileybrosbuildingandloan · 15/02/2024 21:19

thatone · 15/02/2024 10:00

A line from the drama series 'Better Call Saul'. One of the characters has messed up at work and when the friend who caused the problems offers help she says 'I save me'. I find that mindset to be empowering.

Ultimately we must rely on ourselves. It's so obvious when you think about it.

Edited

Kim Wexler is awesome, isn't she?!

Goddessonahighway · 15/02/2024 21:26

About 20 years ago was advised by a work colleague that rent is dead money and I should buy instead. Hadn't really thought about a mortgage by myself before that but was an obedient youngster so went ahead and bought a house on my own (in the time of 100% mortgages - I realise I was very lucky) Thanks, Sue!

baileybrosbuildingandloan · 15/02/2024 21:27

Iamnotawinp · 15/02/2024 15:36

There are some lovely ones on here. I think I’m going to get some A4 paper and write the ones that speak to me the most, and hang them up to remind me.

Something I’ve found in life - sometimes you have to make an important decision in your future (say changing jobs), but you don’t feel yet able to make a decision. Keep ALL your options open up until the last moment the decision has to be made. Sometimes time and events will have made the decision much easier, but you won’t have narrowed your options by inaction.

Also, try to be someone that under promises but over delivers. Try not to be that person that over promises and always under delivers (let’s you down).

My lovely DIL puts them on the inside of kitchen cupboard doors so she sees them when she goes in there. I love this!

keirakilaney67 · 15/02/2024 21:33

"Split the problem in half!" In a technical role, one of the best bosses I've had.
Also, a nice colleague told me... "if your idea of a good life is waking up late and eating bonbons, make sure you aim for that".
I used to be very driven and ambitious but it's not what I really want. Just want to be lazy, wake up late and potter around...

ALunchbox · 15/02/2024 22:00

There are some lovely ones. I can't think of anything new to add unfortunately.

IloveAslan · 15/02/2024 22:01

PurpleFlower1983 · 15/02/2024 14:53

When facing something quite stressful, my lovely great uncle told me, ‘Just think, tonight it will be all over with’. It’s simple and obvious but I’ve thought about that often with exams, interviews, medical procedures etc.

I've been telling myself that for years whenever I face something stressful, and it does help.

gegs73 · 15/02/2024 22:17

My then boss when I was a pretty anxious about everything mid 20s person, told me to not waste my time worrying about things until/if they happened. That has consistently stuck with me and been helpful in my life.

TheBlessedCheesemaker · 15/02/2024 22:28

If you’ve never failed then you’ve not been trying hard enough.

TinyKittenPaw · 15/02/2024 22:34

Dolly Parton.
Will it matter in five year time? If not it probably doesn’t matter that much.

TinyKittenPaw · 15/02/2024 22:40

a colleague once took me aside after a terrible mistake I made at work and said: “you have survived every single bad day you have had in your life. Today will be no different”

samqueens · 15/02/2024 23:08

NellysCheekPlaster · 15/02/2024 10:26

When I had a period of indecision and self-doubt at work, a friend said to me: "You've just got to ask yourself, what would a mediocre, posh man do here? And do that".

I use that advice all the time and not just in work situations.

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
Thank you so much for making me laugh tonight!

samqueens · 15/02/2024 23:25

Cattenberg · 15/02/2024 14:50

It means, just because you can’t see the point of something, that doesn’t mean it’s pointless. Don’t streamline a system/process/department/whatever if you don’t actually know how it works.

Show quote history

Also useful for relationships - if someone keeps you out, maybe it’s not worth trying to get in…

samqueens · 15/02/2024 23:28

BigbigFreezer · 15/02/2024 14:58

I never met the someone as she was off work having broken both her legs and an arm. I was given her office for the duration of her absence but written on her large office whiteboard was

Life is not a dress rehearsal

it has stayed with me thirty five years or so and I’ve often applied it to things I’ve wanted to do, felt, or felt not I should/not do.

My takeaway from seeing this on that particular noticeboard would be…
“hmmm… treat this advice with caution in case you end up with two broken legs and a broken arm!” 🤣

Musntapplecrumble · 15/02/2024 23:32

cocavino · 15/02/2024 18:24

Reading through these reminds me of a few more:

The good old serenity prayer: god grant me the serenity to accept the things that I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference

Similar to something said above: you don't have to berate yourself for a mistake. Just say oops and put it behind you.

The good old serenity prayer: god grant me the serenity to accept the things that I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.

@cocavino Been waiting for this...couldn't remember correctly 😄

MariaVT65 · 16/02/2024 02:00

When out shopping etc - ‘If you see something you like, you can just appreciate it without having to own/buy it’.

When being nervous about applying for a job while pregnant - ‘Everyone in this office, at some point, was born’

IloveAslan · 16/02/2024 03:05

gegs73 · 15/02/2024 22:17

My then boss when I was a pretty anxious about everything mid 20s person, told me to not waste my time worrying about things until/if they happened. That has consistently stuck with me and been helpful in my life.

I try to remember something a wise young friend once said. Worry about it when it happens, if it happens. I always plan for the worst, but am trying to do better!

HappiestSleeping · 16/02/2024 05:56

I thought of another work related one. It's better to fewer things properly than to do a lot of things badly. Decide what you are going to fail, and then forget about it and concentrate on the things that won't fail.