MIL wants to attend funeral but is supposed to be my childcare

[tinatsarina]

So my MIL has the kids for me next Monday while I have 3 job interviews that afternoon. she's now told me she has to attend her sister in laws, brothers funeral. My parents both work so can't cover my childcare (half-term here). Told my partner to tell his mum she can't go but he said she's entitled to and people don't owe me anything. He's now potentially taking the day off even though she had already agreed to the childcare first AIBU to be annoyed that they are prioritising this funeral over the childcare?

You are being unreasonable! I'm staggered that you could think otherwise.

This is a problem for you and DH, not MIL.

I hope op isn't looking at management roles

When are people going to get it. They are your children, you chose to have them, that means they’re your responsibility. There’s two of you how do you think parents that are solo with no support at all function? We do it that mantra that they are ours and no one else is obliged. Try it much less stress actually.

A funeral trumps a job interview. And if I were your mother in law, I wouldn't be offering to babysit again.

YABVU.

Don't you trust your DP to look after his own kids properly?

Why not bring the kids?

Bullshit post. This has not happened as no one is that much of an arsehole.

Since when does she have to give you 'notice' when she goes away? Unless you are paying her to be available, her time is at her own disposal, not yours or your partner's.

No but she could take annual leave. She’s not employed though, is she? She’s doing you a favour.

So it's the brother of your mother-in law's sister-in-law or is it your mother-in-law's brother?

I'm confused with the familial link but yes, I think she should go to the funeral if she feels she needs to.

As an aside, and I shouldn't need to mention this but good to see a DH stepping up for last minute childcare. Makes a pleasant change from some of the husbands/partners we see on Mumsnet.

Because perhaps MIL doesn't want to, she needs no reason to explain why she doesn't want to take three young children to a funeral. Just "I don't want to" is sufficient.

Well with that attitude you’ll run into the same problems as OP, let’s make it clear NO ONE OWES YOU CHILDCARE, so no matter what you think someone should do for you, they doesn’t have to, she’s her own free person and can make her own choices. You’ll be in for a shock when you realise people don’t revolve their lives around what YOU think they should do for you.

YABU; also, ungrateful, selfish,and a touch entitled.

If my daughter in law told me I couldn’t go to a family funeral I wanted to attend - I wouldn’t listen to her. Who the he’ll do you think you are to tell her she can’t go!!!!! I’d never do childcare for you again!

Yes they would give her time off if she had enough annual leave, and some employers might just let her go anyway.

It's ok, you are allowed to say 'entitled cunt' on Mumsnet.

How much do you pay your MIL?

If you want to table childcare you will have to pay for it.

If my daughter in law told me I couldn’t go to a family funeral I wanted to attend - I wouldn’t listen to her. Who the he’ll do you think you are to tell her she can’t go!!!!! I’d never do childcare for you again!

This.

Are you implying she’s employed by you?!

Actually if you search OP's pps - I believe she was concerned last autumn re him falling off the wagon re at least drugs issues... so maybe not...

Are you always this so self observed!!! Your are unbelievably selfish!!!

or bitch - though I sometimes if being polite do b*tch.

I think you mean self absorbed rather than observed. But yes agree with the selfishness of astronomical proportions!

I really wish MN would include scouring the site for posts to use against other posters on the forbidden list. It’s a really, really nasty practice.