People who shorten your name.

[Tetsuo]

I have a name that wasn't unheard of in the 70s, it wasn't popular but it wasn't a complete rarity.

A shortened version of my name became Very Fucking Popular in the 00's but was used before then.

I have never been known as the shortened version of my name, I do not introduce myself as the shortened version of my name. The only people who have ever presumed to use a shortened version of my name are men both professionally and personally who are introduced to me, and then, for some reason, chose to call me by the shortened version of my name.

I obviously correct anyone who does this.

And I have taken to calling anyone who does by a shortened version of their name. No matter how stupid it sounds.

I was going to finish my post with a; 'But why do they do it?'.

I know why they do it.

They need to stop it though.

It's very annoying.

My name can be pronounced in two different ways. It’s amazing how many people pronounce my name wrongly, understandable if they’ve only seen it written down but not when I introduce myself the way I say it.
Also it can be spelled two different ways.
I had a manager who used to add an h into my name when written. Her name ended with an h so I started missing it off.

It happens to me all the time, I always introduce myself with my full name, mostly because the shortening that my family and childhood friends use feels a little unprofessional. Roxanne to Roxy.
Most people I meet will try and shorten it pretty fast, mostly Rox.
I don't mind them shortening it and am happy to go by Rox, it seems friendly and just something people do to be less formal. Like Dave, Steve, Mick/Mike, Jen, Mel, Soph. It feels natural to me that they shorten my name when we know each other.

If I had told them I didn't like it and could they please call me my full name and they ignored that- then I think it's rude, because they are choosing to go against what you asked. But the first time, or if you dont correct it, I think is fine.
I know plently of people who would interview for a job as 'Joseph' because it sounds professional but are perfectly happy being 'Joe' when they actually work there.

It's not a case of "getting over yourself" to be irritated by a person/people calling you by the completely wrong name.

My boss has done it since day one. I ignored at first as I didn't know if she was talking to me. I sign every email with my full name but still she persists.

Interesting how when it's a woman being called by the wrong name she should get over it and life is too short etc.
But if we accidentally use the wrong pronouns it's a hate crime.

Those saying it's not important to get over it...it's hugely important! It's disrespectful not to at least try and get someone's name right, and to deliberately shorten someone's name that you've never met before is plain rude.

I've been on training courses (can't actually remember which ones right now 😂) where they've talked about how important it is to get people's name right. It's about respect - acknowledging other people's identity, not reducing it to something lesser.

It is disrespectful.

It is effectively saying 'I will disregard your own thoughts and feelings and call you what I want to call you. Because I am more important than you'.

It's not hard to say 'may I call you Abi?'

Absolutely.

'I'll call you what I fancy'

Only seems to apply to natal women.

It's rude. Why would you call someone by any other name than what they introduced themselves as? When you introduce your self as "my name is...." that's you politely asking to be called that name. Don't expect people to be polite if you are rude enough to a) not bother listening or b) decide you would prefer to call them a different name.

Op - I get it. People lengthen my name all the bloody time. To a name I actively hate being called. It's tiresome having to correct people constantly.

For me, it's not just men.

I find it quite endearing - I don’t mind. If you do, tell them, it’s quite normal to shorten names. Where I grew up it is anyway

But they are calling her different name. Ie a name that isn't hers. What's so difficult about that? It's irrelevant if it's a shorter version of the same name - it's not her name.

Quite.

People do ask that.

And I say;

'No'.

I make a point of when I introduced to someone by a contraction, asking,

'Steven or Steve? Jo or Joanne? Etc'. Quite often people will say 'I prefer 'full name''.

It's not hard to call somebody by their name.

My husband is able to call me by my full name, he knows I hate any variation.

Yeah I get the "do you get called....." my answer is always "not if you want me to respond"

My name is 4 letters and people sometimes shorten it which drives me mad. Especially as the shortened name is its own word. My name is Lucy and gets shortened to Luce (pronounced loose). I find it awkward to correct people as it’s never done with malice

This!

...can do one.

We did too - people lengthen them!!

I do have a friend called Lucy, and I call her..

Lucy!

I like the name Lucy. It's underused these days.

My husband shortens my name (fair enough) but actually has actually introduced me to people by the shortened version. I've always immediately corrected him as I don't really like the shortened version. His whole family call me the shortened version and even wrote it on cards. Annoying!
Thankfully doesn't happen elsewhere in my life as my name is only two syllables and doesn't need shortening anyway (Think Lucy to Lu)

Nearly everyone I know (including DM) use the shortened version of my name buti dint mind it. It is rude however to do it when you’ve introduced yourself with your full correct name.
We had 2 new staff members start at the same time. They both have names with very common shorter names. I asked if the prefer their full name. They do so that’s what we call them.

Cross threads!

My work is terrible for this. I share a name with a relative of the person who runs the company and so I was told I’d HAVE to go by the shortened version of my name to avoid confusion. It’s my email address and everything. The relative comes into the office less than once a year!!

It niggles me a bit but I don’t mind too much because I don’t actually like the long version of my name either.

They also told another new starter that she’d have to go by the long version of her name (Katherine) because there was already a Katie at the company! She’d never been called that, even at school!

I hate my name being shortened. None of my family or friends do but random acquaintances sometimes take the liberty. Bloody rude. If I have told them my name is Janice, then obviously I am not called Jan.

I correct them nicely the first time, more abruptly if they do it again. Repeat offenders get ignored.

Interestingly enough, I don't mind being called by my surname by old friends. That's fine, it feels familiar and friendly. Moreso than being called Abi, which no-one I've ever liked has called me.

I call my husband by his surname too, thinking about it, my father is called by his surname by many of his friends and I do it to my oldest friends too.

Maybe that's super-annoying and I should stop it!