To really not understand baby led weaning?

[Leavetowean]

I’ve been trying it with my baby (with some trepidation) but I really can’t understand at all how they are meant to not choke.

She just gagged and vomited on some food because she obviously took it straight to the back of her throat as she hasn’t got any teeth to chew it.

I feel like it’s a massive step back for us. I’m really not enjoying the weaning journey one bit, I find it so stressful (and no she isn’t picking up on my stress) but AIBU to think the whole let them eat what you eat just doesn’t work for some babies? What am I missing?

I probably am being over anxious about it all. It’s just so tricky.

I started her on some veg, carrot and sweet potatoes. It didn’t go well! I then signed up for introducing solids course and it made me feel more confident about maybe trying baby led weaning (it wasn’t particularly swayed that way but it made me want to try it) but it hasn’t worked either!

I hate weaning so much!

How old is she? My baby has no teeth but has been BLW from the start and has no issues. They really don’t need teeth, he eats strips of meat, watermelon, pasta, anything really.

He struggled a bit the first couple of weeks so we took it really slow. Toast is a great one as it goes soggy while they chew. Gagging is normal. To be honest I just found you just have to trust that their body will respond in the way it’s supposed to (I.E not let them choke) and also I know first aid which is helpful. I recommend Solid Starts too, they also have a free first aid guide.

I liked the Purple Ella’s Kitchen book for weaning, purées to start off with and then recipes for different ages and ideas for finger foods etc. Also recommend solid starts.

She’s seven months in a week or so.

I wonder if some babies just take to it easily. She doesn’t seem sure what to do with it. I can’t see her doing anything with meat other than spit it out. I know foods for fun until they’re one but it’s not strictly speaking true and I am feeling a bit of pressure especially since it’s tricky getting milk into her.

Also I think some babies just take better to food than others. I thought I was a weaning genius first time around as my baby would eat anything, now he’s a standard fussy toddler. So while I’m pleased my second baby has weaned well, I’m not expecting it to last.

It’s also to do with allergies. My friend was told to start weaning her prem baby at 6 months despite her only being 3.5 corrected because of the higher risk of allergies the later you start

Hi OP, I am currently weaning a 7 month old too. We have an amazing thing called the catchy which goes under the high chair and catches dropped food so you can just put it back on the tray again. It has saved so much food from going to waste - that was the thing I detested about weaning my eldest.

BLW is just not spoon feeding. That's the only difference. I put smooth things like yogurt or mushed veg on the spoon and my baby then picks up the spoon herself. Yes it sometimes goes on her forehead or her face, but she's getting better.

It's a pain and my kid isn't getting a lot in either. But she'll get there. Hang in there OP! And get a catchy 😉

If she’s not even seven months yet I really wouldn’t worry! The gagging etc is her learning how to eat. The more exposure she has to solid foods, the quicker she’ll get the hang of it. As other PPs have said, it’s not actually about how much food she’s consuming right now, it’s literally just her learning to eat. Then once she’s learned how to eat she will start actually eating more. You could always do one meal of solid food and one meal of something soft so you cover both angles, it doesn’t need to be one or the other.

Other finger food ideas aside from vegetables - crumpets with cream cheese, scrambled egg, fluffy pancakes (sugar free), frittata / quiche (watch for salt content). Plot a banana in three by putting your finger in the top, perfect food to hold on to and suck. But toast is honestly the best, so many different toppings you can use to get some nutrition in them and easy for them to eat.

Personally I think it can be done without all the gagging. If they're ready and you take it slow. It doesn't happen at all.

From my personal experience anyway.

Thanks - I do appreciate all this but how realistic is it she’ll eat toast? She isn’t going to have a full slice. So a quarter, half? So confusing. Will try tomorrow.

Cut it into strips, give her one at a time so if she drops it on the floor you can give her a new one. She might just suck it a bit and only actually swallow a tiny amount, but that’s still learning.

I’ve just caught up with your previous posts and can see you’re thinking of putting it on hold for a couple of months, can totally sense your frustration and understand your reasoning, but if you stick with it but try to take the pressure off how much she’s actually eating then she’ll be much further ahead at nine months than she is now. It’s much easier said than done though I know, and I do agree fitting it into the day seems hard work at first, especially with an older DC.

I made things like porridge, pasta (with smaller pasta shapes for babies) cottage pie, fish pie etc.. all things I could spoon feed but also sit with my baby and eat myself. Real food not from a jar, but spoonable. Then gave the odd finger foods as well like chopped banana and toast. Spoon fed yoghurt. I was also worried about choking.

He's 7 now and eats well. In hindsight I think I could have given a few more veggies on thier own, rather than cooked into sauces as he doesn't eat all vegetables, but happy to eat certain ones. For example he eats broccoli but not cauliflower, but as a baby he only really had it in cauliflower cheese or fish pie.

She doesn't need to eat a lot of toast though. Shes just coming up to 7 months. Just let her try a bit and don't be concerned about the amount.

I used to give porridge a lot at this age, with mashed banana. Then very slowly moved on to toast.

Disagree, babies have a gag reflex further towards the front than adults so gagging at times is likely. Like with anything I imagine some babies are prone to more gagging than others. If my DS was struggling with something particularly though I’d take it away and try again in a couple of weeks or so.

I really think it varies baby to baby and how they take to food.
I did baby led weaning from the start, didn't do any purées but my now 10 month old somehow never choked or gagged on anything. I think we've been lucky in that respect. Whereas I have mum friends who gave the same food and baby gagged with everything.

If it's not working for you and you're finding it stressful then stick to purée ! There's nothing wrong with just doing purée

Have you tried eating with her and modelling what to do? Grab some toast, plonk her on your lap and start eating. If she seems interested, then break her off a bit. I find my daughter wasn’t keen initially, but we sat with her and ate the same stuff and she very quickly came around

Thanks. It’s definitely partly a confidence thing. It’s really hard feeding her generally at the moment and she’s gone from being a pretty content chilled baby to a very fussy one, so I’m keen for things to change. It does reassure me though when I read the things above. I just seem to keep to need reading them so don’t be surprised if you see a similar post in a few days!

The problem is that at the moment it’s really hard holding her. She’s very squirmy and wriggly. I took her and her brother to a kids theatre performance a couple of weeks ago and nearly dropped her onto the poor family in front of me, she was so squirmy. She arches her back and stretches right out. So holding onto her and eating myself is pretty difficult, to say the least!

She does seem fairly enthusiastic about trying food, but doesn’t seem to eat much if any. But she is doing a lot of poos at the moment so perhaps more than I think I’d going in, but it really isn’t much.

@Springbaby2023 sounds like we do agree.

When your baby was gagging, you stopped and tried again later- when they were ready and didn't gag.

I work with mums and babies - weaning is a process, it can take ages before they eat a meaningful amount of food, initially it is about tasting new flavours and learning about textures and chewing. It feels pointless when they play with it but it's an important development stage in learning to eat so try to go with it! Don't put either of yourselves under pressure, just let her see you eat and if she wants some, give her a go!

Also to those saying BLW is a "fad" - it's literally how we evolved to wean babies, giving them bits of "adult food" Can't imagine they had blenders making purees in caves!!

Also OP, babies are actually more likely to choke on purees than safely prepared finger foods as they have less control over how much goes in and it flows down their throat more easily when they might not necessarily be ready to swallow it. Second all the recommendations to Solid Starts, their videos are brilliant (obv not recommended by my professional persona as are not UK based but they are great in my opinion as a mum 😉

I hear you! My baby is three weeks older than yours. Every day for over a month I have been putting her in the highchair and either giving her homemade purees, shop bought purees or cooked veg and other finger foods. We both end up covered and the dog has walked mushed banana and avocado up the stairs. I hate it. And day after day she ate nothing but just chucked things about or spat it out. Until a few days ago when suddenly she started eating and it's actually going in. Still a lot on the floor but feels suddenly less pointless. She'll get there.

We started with one of these as I was anxious but he happily progressed on to proper BLW amzn.eu/d/5Mx8cnb

Thanks everyone, you’re all really putting my mind at rest. Toast tomorrow it is then!

DS2 is a few days older than your DD. I also have a DS1. I also hate weaning with a passion. Both of mine have been ardent spoon refusers so BLW it is. It’s messy and wasteful.

BUT. DS1 was exactly like your DD. Gagged and vomited and threw food and smeared and squashed. His poo basically didn’t change from EBF poo until about 9 or 10 months when he figured out swallowing. From 10 months onwards he has been an INCREDIBLE eater. No fussy phases, great appetite. A joy to eat with.

Im hoping it’ll be the same with DS2 as I am already feeling the despair. I think you have to view these early months as the long game. At least that’s what I’m telling myself as I pick up untouched food from the floor…

You sound like you’re stressing out and taking it all a bit too seriously. What are you blending?
my babies were big eaters and went from mush to full plated dinners pretty quickly. The first fail safe foods were:
mashed potato ( lots of butter)
banana
avocado
pears
berries
yoghurt
bread and butter with soup to dip.
cereals
scrambled egg
beans
fish pie
cottage pie
stew and dumplings
Pop the tv on or chat casually to her while she tries it/ plays with it and potter about a bit don’t sit and stare at her and make her feel pressure. Mine used to cover themselves in food at dinner and would get put straight in the bath… it was the making of an evening routine .
you can batch cook and freeze stuff don’t waste all your money on pouches and stuff . It’s an absolute rip off.