To be annoyed by my weight but not my size?

[chatenoire]

This is just venting... But I'm fairly heavy for my size and always have been.

I'm currently 68kg / 1.59m and a size 8 or 13y in kids clothes.

You can actually see my abs and most certainly don't look chubby but definitely not skinny either. I'm very much happy with my size though.

I don't really lift (15lbs is the heaviest dumbbell I own) but I do workout.

It's really annoying because I never feel my weight is a true reflection of my size.

Even at my skinniest (around 52-53kg) I looked way too thin even though for all terms and purposes I was a healthy weight. (I was a size 4 at the time).

You know muscle weighs more than fat right? Not sure why you are concentrating on the numbers on the scales vs the look in the mirror? You need to reduce the fixation on the scale.

Well, in stretchy clothes I might fit into an 8 in some items, but it's not a size I normally wear these days. When I was younger a 10 was often too big on me, 8's were harder to find in some stores (even in the 90's!), and ideally I would have been a '9'! Nowadays I wear what fits - I have a size 'start point', especially in stores I know quite well, but will often end up going up or down a size! I am at the age where comfort matters too though. :)

Unless my conversion back to 'old money' is off, you're 5' 2.5" and 10 and a half stone? I'm 5' 4" and 9 stone. Also a size 8, and in your picture you look leaner than me. Your body shape (you look like an inverted triangle shape?) may be the reason, as your broader shoulders wouldn't up your jeans size, and also make your mid section look narrower. You have very little abdominal weight either by the looks of things, which again helps with fitting into smaller waist sizes.

I could weight 100 stone but if I was a size 8 I'd be cockerhoop

No it doesn't. Muscle is denser. You mean muscle consumes less volume than fat.

I think those are just the posters responding - those who are similar height, size etc

It used to be hard to find an 8, but with supersizing there are 6s and 8s everywhere. M&S 6 is actually an old 10 imo.

so if I get a 4cm block of fat, and a 4cm block of muscle... the muscle would weigh more, that may be because its more dense but it still weighs more... so the scales aren't where OP should be focusing.

Me too. At 5ft 4 and ten stone I was a comfortable size 8.

I’m quite hour glassy in shape so maybe boobs, and bum add extra weight.

I have strong legs and my frame is large if we go off not being able to touch my finger and thumb together when placed around my wrist.

I guess added up extra bone and leg/breast mass would make a difference on the scales.

Yeah smaller sizes are much more common now......now that I have less need for them. 😝

The OP knows all this.
I think she is trying to reconcile being overweight according to NHS BMI (yeah yeah..it's a blunt tool, but it does work for the vast majority of people), and having been reassured many times by professionals that she is healthy, and being totally fine with her size (i.e. measurements and how her clothes fit).

Sorry, that sentence is grammatical bobbins, you get what I'm trying to say.

Exactly.

If OP can't reconcile that an NHS guideline isn't accurate for a wide range of people (because a wide guideline can't be) and can't appreciate that the basis for this is simply scientific, then she has a bigger issue with this.

This!
If you are fit and healthy, it doesn't matter.

As a fellow short woman I can tell you Tesco size 8 is not size 8 - it is big and more like a 10/12.

My weight has not changed much since the 1980s - maybe a wee bit heavier post children. But I used to be a 10/12. Now I am a 6/8 and in some brands the 6 is too big. Loads of brands seem to have upsized in the past few years.

BINGO!

When I was 17 I was 70kg and my size was a 12 and I still own some of those clothes (well my DM in her house, but haven't thrown them away for whatever reason and I still try them on every now and then) and they're huge on me, so at least I have something to compare against and they're 25 years old!

I'm naturally wide, but lean-ish. I know this. I also know I have short legs and a longer torso.

This is my experience too. In the 80s I was I was a size 12, weight around 9 stone and 24" waist. Now, same weight and 25" waist, and I'm a size 8 who needs to safety pin my waist bands to make them fit.

Fine, but why does it need multiple posts. It's not normal behavior.

@Wasbedeudetetdas as I said I work in women's retail and we discuss clothing all the time as it's literally our job . How things fit and sizing of things .

Anyways I'm happy with my figure and weight . It doesn't bother me but being short does make you look bigger than you are if you have curves

I must have missed the bit about you job, sorry. I don't tend to discuss clothes with shop staff tbh but I get that some women might ask for help/advice.

To you it isn't, to me it is :) . My brain normally has a topic that it chews on... They go in cycles and can be about all sorts of different things. I have been told it's most likely to be caused by my ND.

We’re not all built the same. I’m heavier than I look too which puts me towards the top end of my health BMI range. I once got down to the lower end of my healthy range and I looked dreadful- far too thin. So while most people might look and feel their best at the middle of their BMI range, some of us might naturally fall nearer the top or bottom of that range.

In my case, I have quite a lot of muscle mass and also genuinely believe I have heavy bones! I’m sort of solid-looking but a size 8-10 with low body fat. I very rarely weigh myself because it’s not useful information for me (but whenever I do, I’m almost always 60kg)

It sounds as though you have spent a lot of time scrutinising your body and weight. Do you have a lot of free time? Not being snarky but just wonder if keeping a bit busier will help you cut down on the obsessing.

Ok, but it still doesn't need to be on the internet every time. It's not helping you, or anyone else. This was addressed on the very first page and you've ignored it all until you got the validation you were looking for, again. I say this kindly, for your own sake, go back to your therapist instead of obsessing on mumsnet.

I find the whole weight thing a bit strange sometimes too. I used to be 56kg and was a size 8 now I’m 60kg and a size 10. I’m 5’8. So going by weight alone, I should probably be in a smaller size than you but I’m not. My weight is evenly distributed I’m not top or bottom heavy. Factors such as muscle, age etc play a part too. So if you’re happy with how you look, active , a gym goer etc I don’t think you should pay any attention to the scales.

Yeah, maybe next time in your opening post you could say you're just chewing things over due to your ND and actually don't want or need any responses.
Or don't post in AIBU.

I’m the same weight as you, but 5” taller & a size 12 uk
I work out 4/5 with weights, walk etc but look heavier than you imo