To be annoyed by my weight but not my size?

[chatenoire]

This is just venting... But I'm fairly heavy for my size and always have been.

I'm currently 68kg / 1.59m and a size 8 or 13y in kids clothes.

You can actually see my abs and most certainly don't look chubby but definitely not skinny either. I'm very much happy with my size though.

I don't really lift (15lbs is the heaviest dumbbell I own) but I do workout.

It's really annoying because I never feel my weight is a true reflection of my size.

Even at my skinniest (around 52-53kg) I looked way too thin even though for all terms and purposes I was a healthy weight. (I was a size 4 at the time).

d) don't have any behaviours that would be considered a disorder

you are on a site asking random strangers to validate your size, and posting the same picture over and over again hoping for compliments to make you feel better. That’s not normal behaviour. You need some help.

That's where you're wrong, I'm not looking for validation or compliments. I'm venting because the people who are close to me can't relate. My DH kind of gets it now.

My best friend is bigger than me and around my same weight, and my DM thinks I'm too thin.

I'm truly happy, it's just annoying. I don't need validation to be happy with myself, my mirror/ clothes are more than enough validation.

You have a lot of muscle! That is awesome. Just try and maintain it. Out of interest what is your waist size?

@chatenoire I recognise your username, your are ND aren't you? Which might explain a fixation on the numbers on the scale.
You need to focus on your physical health and how you feel possibly trickier if you struggle with interoception.

I feel the same way. I think I'm heavy at 135 pounds and size 8 . I'm a very curvy hourglass with 32e boobs so I just figure my weight is in my legs and bum .

I'm truly happy, it's just annoying. I don't need validation to be happy with myself, my mirror/ clothes are more than enough validation.

If you were truly happy, you wouldn’t care. You clearly are looking for validation having posted previously including photos. You need professional help.

I hate these threads.

Also presume his is uk size 8 otherwise I've for size 12 that's about right

Yes indeed I am :) . I also move from "fixation" to "fixation" but they're genuinely mild irritations (my feet being wide is another one for example).

I have a friend who is very petit, size 6-8 and about 5 foot, her BMI puts her in the obese category. That's because she does a lot of exercise. She runs marathons, goes to the gym most days, she's pure muscle.

Weight is not a useful gauge for people like her and you try to stop obsessing about it. Get some callipers and measure body fat instead.

I'm like this too, weirdly heavy for my size. I've solved it by never weighing myself.

Hi,

You can have 3 people, same weight, same height and they'll be completely different sizes. If you're happy with your shape, I'd try my best to stop weighing yourself or at least not so often.

I have a friend who is similar. Quite heavy on the scales in comparison to her size. But if she lost weight to get to a number she was more comfortable with, she'd then be unhappy with looking too thin.

As someone who struggles to gain weight and used to obsess over eating more in order to achieve my 'goal weight' the best thing I did for peace of mind was to stop watching the numbers.

Best of luck

I was about to say the same.

Weight is meaningless and obsessing over it is unhealthy.

I get it. I am a lot heavier than I look. When I was a slim size 10/12 I was probably 12.5 stone I am taller though, 168cm

I was in the TA and we were weighed for something and the sgt made a big fuss that I didn't look that heavy. I was only about 18 and he mortified me! I was a size 8 then and I remember joining slimming world and my weight was 10.5 stone when I joined.

I've watched slimming shows on TV over the years and I am usually surprised by much larger people in size weighing in and around what I do!

You said your happy so that's the main thing. I remember going to a GP as I was down about it when I was younger at uni and she said the scales is a starting point, just another tool they use to assess the health of a person. Seeing things in magazines about needing to be 8/9 stone and knowing I would never weigh that used to make me feel like I wasn't good enough or something.

I'm pregnant now and after I have the baby my only goal is to get fit again I miss spinning. Also to fit into size 10 jeans. That didn't happen after baby so so we will see, I'm happy enough with 12.

I was once called a liar on MN when I posted similar stats, so I'm here to say I believe you! I'm 5' 5", 12st 5lbs and a size 12. Two years ago, at my heaviest (18st 5lbs, category 3 obese according to BMI) I wore a size 20. I'm very densely packed 😂

I was speaking to someone recently who expressed shock that we are roughly the same height and weight but they wear size 14/16 clothes.

I also don't lift weights. I have a genetic condition that makes strenuous exercise difficult and even yoga causes my joints to dislocate. My only exercise is walking and even then I have to wear ankle braces and knee supports 😅

Ditto. I’m 55kg same height and an 8.

I’m not sure why you’re so bothered by it, but as a similar size your weight is def disproportionate to your size. I guess you have a lot of muscle?

I’m 164cm and 7 stone 12, I wear 6-8 in vanity sizing I’d say I’m really 8-10 in old sizes. But I have a mum tum and I’m not that toned. I’d much rather be as toned as you and weigh more. Women are never happy!

Seen this picture before and you don't look a size 8.

Both images also you OP, definitely not a size 8 and you've posted this photo multiple times since 2022.

Well believe it or not it's a size 8, sure it's from Tesco's so maybe some vanity sizing but still a regular size 8.

Op you need to chuck the scales away.

You can ask medical professionals not to tell you your weight.

I threw mine out and honestly it's such a relief.

Just love and accept yourself for the unique person you are.

I’ve got a thread in weight loss chat. I was 23 stone - even then I was a size 22/24. I’ve known other women at 23 stone to be a size 28 at my height.

I posted a photo of me at christmas on there when I was 13 stone on the nose and I got a few pms of people saying I looked smaller than them at a couple of stone lighter!

I was diagnosed as coelaic a few years ago, and as part of that, I had a bone density scan. They did comment that my bone density was very good, I thought no shit, heavy bones 🤣

Two of my children are the same as me.

Stop weighing yourself and measure instead.

You're right that weight has nothing to do with size (nor health, really).

Eh?

@chatenoire I get it OP, people never believe me if I tell them my weight, I workout all the time, do weights and muscle is denser than fat, so you can be slimmer but weigh more if you have a greater percentage of muscle mass. Be proud of your muscle, most people would kill for abs. Remember the scales are just telling you a number, it's not the full picture as the scales don't know your body composition (body fat scales are super inaccurate as well). My trainer recently had a body scan which tells you the exact weight, muscle mass, bodyfat percentage and is quite accurate. She had lost bodyfat, gained muscle mass and her weight had gone up 1lb. Even with that data she still struggled to not be upset as after all her hard work, instead of focusing on the fat loss and muscle gain, all she could think about is the 1lb increase in weight. If you can throw away the scales but if you can't try to detach from the number. You are fit and healthy and BMI and weight don't give you the full picture of who you are and you are gorgeous.