Irks me to see mums boasting about "childfree" nights out & "kid free weekends away"

[Bridgetjoneski]

I just find it very distasteful! I have one or two mum friends on insta & know them in real life. But at least every fortnight they have insta posts up about "kid free" night out with dh or "kid free weekend away". They are quite wealthy & both work full time, I just find it very unsavoury. Tag a dinner your hubby but no need to state the kids absense.
Is this a rising trend or just limited to the pair I know? The latest status tagging the latest dinner out was "not a child in sight"...

Not gonna lie, I think OP is just trolling at this point...#wokeupwithonemoreirk

Do you have children?

I don’t leave DC often at all, nor do I post/boast about it when I do, but if you’re not a mother you have no idea how hard and relentless it is.

I know. It is crazy. I never met my great grandparents. But they were still my great grandparents!

Or a job. Too much idle time can cause the brain to atrophy 😂

Just imagining OP's social media... #worklessnotirkless

I mean we all have things that annoy us, but you are being pretty irrational. Especially as someone who doesn't work, hasn't mentioned excess caring responsibilities, and has hours of carefree time when the kids are at school.
I have probably mentioned being child free because between working, caring for my terminally ill parent and parenting my own kids I do like to celebrate the non caring time I have to myself. And I think someone like you, not in that situation, probably needs to pipe down and have a think about how other people might be feeling.

Also as your kids are older I find it weird that you're so precious about this. My 9 year old is perfectly able to understand that sometimes her dad and I like to go out without her and her sibling! To do boring grown up things while she has a lovely time with her uncle or whatever. Same as when she went to the cinema with her wee friend while I waited outside, they kept going on about how much fun it was to have no parents! Doesn't mean she doesn't love me!

Honestly it sounds like you have a LOT of free time on your hands to overthink this. One advantage of a job, it stops naval gazing like this!

You don't know what found family means do you? Grim OP, very grim.

It's testament to how much (child free, lol) leisure time the OP has that she thinks the novelty is going out to see friends, or dinner with husband, rather than being without the kids.

Being blunt, on those evenings the highlight IS being without my children. Children that I love wholeheartedly and love spending time with.

I can (and do sometimes) have do dinner out with husband and children. The novelty isn't going out for dinner, or my husband being there. The novelty is my children NOT being there. The novelty of being able to talk uninterrupted enjoy whatever we want. Not having to resolve arguments. Not having to manage boredom. Not having to cut up food. Not having to retrieve cutlery from the floor and ask for more. Not having my food go cold because of an urgent run to the loo with a child that turns into an accident for them.

The OP has more free time in a single day than many of us get in a month. Being child free isn't a novelty for her because it's her norm. I don't have time for yoga, or pilates, or swimming, or getting my nails done. I take off a half day every couple of months to spend time with my husband, and make up the time by working extra in the evenings.

Are you jealous? I am a bit lol.

Massively in the minority here but I’m with you, OP. It’s crass and a bit mean, if you’re away from your kids loads already and it’s not actually a novelty.

I do overthink hugely, but for me I would also think about rubbing people’s faces in my huge disposable income, or way worse, people who have experienced baby loss or infertility and the way those posts would land.

I would just unfollow them though, if they are pressing your buttons. You don’t have to participate in their Boasty McBoastface antics.

People with fertility issues are going to be sensitive about anything related to kids. Probably worse to see posts fawning over children as making their life complete and perfect, compared to people having a break

@2031mummyTBC I agree

Nobody is trying harder than @Bridgetjoneski to prove she has the most perfect life and how she is the perfect Mum.

But it's irrelevant....I love pizza. I don't want it every meal.
I have my favourite joggers, but it's nice to dress up every so often.

These sorts of comparisons are being made a lot, and I think they’re missing the OP’s point.

When you eat something that isn’t pizza and enjoy it, you’re not enjoying it purely because it’s not pizza, you’re enjoying it for its own sake. OP is saying that the #childfree hashtag is suggesting that her friends are not enjoying themselves because of the company or the activity, it’s the very state of being without their children that they’re enjoying the most. In a similar way, I look forward to the weekend irrespective of what plans I have - I just look forward to not being at work. A PP said earlier that #outwiththegirls doesn’t mean that person who said it hates their partner - of course it doesn’t, but it’s not the same thing: #partnerfree, on the other hand, does kind of imply that you’re glad to get away from them.

Not that I don’t think OP is being extremely obtuse about other points, or that I can’t empathise at all this one. I am one of those awful parents who really does spend every moment they can with their kids, but I remember having a root canal when my oldest (a very intense toddler) was two and thinking that getting to lie down for 45 whole minutes without anyone demanding my attention was bliss…

They’re allowed to enjoy grown up nights out with the mental and physical load of their children temporarily passed on to someone else.

If they’re working 40 hours a week they won’t have much time in their days to relax and let off steam, and writing a hashtag does not mean they don’t like their children fgs

If it’s specifically seeing this hashtag which ‘irks’ you why don’t you do something about it and delete or mute them from your social media?

What the what now? I am not wealthy and pay through the nose for a child free night. Where do I stand with the judgmental bollocks?

@Bridgetjoneski get off their social media pages then, delete or mute their posts. Or tell them it irks you that they enjoy time away from their kids, see how that goes down

You don't have kids then?

@fuckssaaaaake Then you are guilty of participating in a "zeitgeist" of anti-children, as well as disturbing OP's "no-irks" zone. Distasteful! 😂

I think you have this issue because you choose to interpret '#childfree' negatively. When I see that I think maybe after dinner they'll get to go home to an empty house and have loud and wild sex 😂

Meh. I'm more bothered by the OPs ignorance regarding 'found family'

My adult daughter has said she would not be bothered by this kind of hashtag. I imagine many grown-up children are the same. Do you think you’re speaking for all kids?
Definitely not speaking for mine, that's for sure. They're not that precious, I guess. Either that or they are secure and well loved and take the sentiment for what it is

Admitting that you love your children and find their company pleasant is met with eye rolling and mockery (you can see it on this thread). The current zeitgeist is quite anti child
It really isn't. Not even close
I love my children. They were awesome as kids and are awesome as adults. I was a single parent for many many years, so we spend a LOT of time together. I'm happy to admit that, why wouldn't I? Or anyone? You'll do an injury with a stretch like that 😂
And I really, really loved #childfree nights with #notachildinsight

OP is saying that the #childfree hashtag is suggesting that her friends are not enjoying themselves because of the company or the activity, it’s the very state of being without their children that they’re enjoying the most
Sometimes it is 🤷‍♀️

Social media is fake
Also, nobody forces you to follow them

Get off insta, get on with your own life .What other people choose to post is nothing to do with you.

OP has probably muted most of us because we are crass or she's started another thread about how amazing she is.

OP is saying that the #childfree hashtag is suggesting that her friends are not enjoying themselves because of the company or the activity, it’s the very state of being without their children that they’re enjoying the most
Sometimes it is 🤷‍♀️

Oh I accept that, but
a) a lot of people are missing that point altogether (“just because I enjoy x doesn’t mean I don’t love y” - but emphasising that you’re enjoying x is not the same as emphasising that you are free from y)
b) we don’t talk about the other people in our lives in quite the same way. You never see the hashtags #partnerfree, #siblingfree, #friendfree, #parentfree…

Wait til you have children then MY GOD you will understand 😂