Food portions and how to laugh this off??

[PenisPortions]

Help me dear mners, my dh is gaslighting me into accepting his penis portions and I need your stories of similar craziness to help me laugh it off..!

In laws came round, we had two large steaks for dinner. MIL wasn't keen on steak so we made her a stuffed pepper and sides so she was catered for and happy. FIL wanted half of one of the steaks, fine. Dh asked what I thought about that and I said yes fine we'll just share the rest. Dh looked confused for a bit and I said I think it's enough between the two of us to share the remainder.

FIL cooked the sides, DH bbqed the steaks (i was in with the baby), and I come out to see three plates of food. Two have half a steak on them and the third has a whole steak, which dh had claimed as his plate.

I was like ummm are you not splitting it? He said yes I did, and I kind of laughed in disbelief saying no you've given yourself twice the amount of food as me! He got really defensive, said this was what we agreed (not true), and got cross. I told him I was going to even things out, so cut off some of his, and he was so grumpy about it, saying he'd said he wanted a full one and I agreed to that. No "I'm sorry I misunderstood and under catered for you, let's split it like grown ups".

It is such a stupid little thing but keeps playing on my mind, what on earth was that?! Please tell me stories of similar imbalances that your partners have tried to get away with to help me put it into perspective.

The other thing is that for most people fillet steak would be a bit of a treat. Even if I did normally (voluntarily) eat less than my dh, I'd be damn sure I wanted half of the available steak, even if I didn't want as many chips or whatever the accompaniments were.

Totally agree @theduchessofspork , he's a selfish git but nothing to do with penis portions.

Men need 1/3 more calories? Really? It's actually only 20% more BUT those estimates were created back when men having active jobs and women being housewives was the norm.

The fact that more men than women are overweight or obese in this country (68.6% of men, 59.0% of women) makes me think male privilege takes this 'need more calories meat cos penis' lark too far.

Thats him being selfish though, not penis portions.

The two aren't mutually exclusive. I'd be very surprised if 'I'm a man - I need more food than her' wasn't at least part of his justification for taking the larger portion.

OP - I think the interesting thing is that this bothered you (fair - it would have enraged me too) and your way of dealing with it is to look to minimise the issue by asking for stories of others having done the same. Does it matter what other couples have done or would do?
This is not OK with you and needs addressing with your DH.

In my house it would have been split between us and DH would only have accepted some back after I’d finished eating if I had left some (I wouldn’t have).

1. I said he was a dick in this instance.
2. Men have a higher need for protein, so unless that bread and butter was 75% butter, then no. That wouldn't have done the trick really.

Penis portions are a thing.
During WW2 men working in heavy industry or farming were allocated extra food rations.

Surely men do need more food though given they're generally bigger etc, so do have a higher calorie intake per day?

If I ate like my DH, i'd definitely put on weight whereas he maintains his weight?!
Most men tend to be bigger than women and need more calories. We all know this. I'd be the size of a house if I tried to keep up with what my partner actually needs to eat.

Really selfish. When my DC were under 1 and I was breastfeeding, DH would always make sure I got the bigger portion if in a situation like that. If I'd mentioned splitting it equally he wouldn't have any of it. Now he'd split it without asking.

He could have added cheese to the bread and butter - but the point is here, as in all the penis portion threads, he wanted more of the best bit. That's always the case in penis portion threads - that women are left hungry at the expense of filling men up. The men are never expected to put up with being a bit hungry or - shock horror - filling up on carbs for once rather than expensive protein.

Women who come on and complain about penis portions don't mean they got given an appropriate amount of food in comparison to their male partners; they mean they got given something inadequate on the basis that they're a woman and should put up with being hungry or given something less satisfying. There's a pattern of giving men the best stuff, not just bigger portions. But always posters will jump on saying men need more calories, ignoring that it isn't only about number of calories on the plate. When people here mock penis portions (that phrase has started to grate now I've typed it four times!) they are mocking the idea that men deserve better than women, rather than the idea that men need a bit more than women. Talking about respective calorie requirements misses the point.

The way to a mans heart is through his stomach.

having spent quite a lot of time studying the anatomy of the area. I can confidently tell you this is not the case. the way to a man's heart is usually through the neck or the groin, or by cracking open his chest.

@Marchintospring

you are so right

op shouldn’t have had any of the steak she should have let her husband have it all to make him happy as a man

It annoys me when men do this and claim they should have the bigger portion, but when a ( similarly annoyed) friend and I looked into it, male bodies definitely need more calories so I guess there’s a certain logic to it.
If it’s something like a few chocolate truffles to be shared I think it’s still unreasonable but actually in the steak instance it is probably hard to make a scientific case ( though breastfeeding might change it).

It doesn’t have to be fillet steak though does it?! He can have a tuna sarnie later.

Men’s calorie needs are not relevant to the stealing of fillet steak.

For all the women who think men should have the best cuts, there are many more who resent men not being hungry. And selfishness is universal.

The op is breastfeeding. Did you think about this for a minute before spouting men deserve all the good stuff? I googled, I didn’t even have to click. Ignore the bullshti about assigned male at birth. Men need less protein per day than breastfeeding women. Men have no practice in not assuming they need more of anything they want and women like you feed into that immense self-centredness. He should have given the
op the whole steak and shared one with his dad.

Bloody hell!

Fillet steaks are never that big- they really only vary by thickness.

In my house I'd have let Dh have a whole one rather than faffing about trying to divvy up 3/4 of a steak- because it's not that big a deal, DH is bigger and always eats more than me at every meal, and I am generous and nice.

Actually though, it probably wouldn't have happened that way though because my FIL would never have accepted half of a fillet steal knowing there was meant to be a fillet steak each for DH and I, because he has far more manners than that and he would have had the lamb chops.

@alittleprivacy the recommended calorie intake is 2000 for women and 2500 for men. Breastfeeding adds 500. So they both needed to eat the same in this case.

Steak is in fact one of the easiest foods to make a scientific case in favour of the woman having more, because women need more iron than men. Look into more than just calories, if this is the approach you're taking.

Here are protein needs per day of the average man and breastfeeding women. Please memorise this so you never again wade into an argument claiming of course
he needs double the steak you do he’s a MAN. Your women friends will love you for
it if they are at the pregnant and breastfeeding stage.

I didn’t know about the protein need myself but Dh cooked me all the steak as my iron was terrible post birth several times. It’s hard to recover from the birth with iron at rock bottom and it’s hard to boost the iron levels with a baby sucking it out of you. Steak for me, all the steaks, with spinach and broccoli chased with some OJ.

As a young man, I would typically eat cheaper alternatives to my girlfriend. I could buy lots of small sausages for the price of a small steak. I got the food I needed. Of course, that is not always possible and then it is difficult.

This.
Also- what does it have to do with penis size?
Daft to buy too little steak ( or whatever) when feeding others .

Really?! Over 1/4 of a steak? 🤨