DH and his flag pole dream….

[Lilysienna1]

DH mentioned a few years ago, that he has ‘always wanted’ to have a flag on display in the front garden. A proper flag on a pole, that we would raise up every morning, and ‘fly at half mast’ when the occasion calls for it.

I have never ever even thought of having a flag. We are British and I know it’s quite common in America, but not so much here. DH isn’t a football fan, so it’s nothing to do with the flag flying we see during the World Cup and the like.

last year, for Christmas he said the only present he would wish for, was to have that flag. He was most disappointed with the watch and aftershave he received instead.

He has now mentioned it to 13 year old DD who thinks it’s ‘kinda cool’ and she could imagine using it behind her for tik tok dances.

So now, I’m being made out to be highly unreasonable and a bore, for saying I do not want to raise a bloody flag every morning and see it outside the front of my house every day. I did try to compromise by saying ‘maybe’ a small one in the back garden, but DH says it’s to go out the front only, and why should we be ashamed of patriotism.

We don’t live in a grand estate home, just a detached house in a redrow cul-de-sac. The neighbours wouldn’t be affected as there are large trees between our only neigbours drive and ours, and we are on the corner.

However, everyone that comes in and out our road will see it as it’s the first house.

what would you do?? Give in and say yes to DH and his flag pole or put your foot down? Am I really being that unreasonable and boring? Does anyone else fly a flag? 🤦🏻‍♀️

Has your DH ever explained actually why he wants a flag? Seems quite a random and strange thing to want. Have you tried politely just saying no and that you’d prefer not to have a flag flying as it’s your own house and garden too?

This is weird scout-leader style behaviour of the kind of person who requires everyone to refer to them as “The Commodore” or something. The behaviour of the sort of person who joins a club with rules just to enjoy being subject to AND enforcing those rules. The sort who thinks saluting has merit, and that special edition coins require collecting.

Is your DH normally quite patriotic? Just seems very odd to latch onto wanting to fly a flag in your garden all of a sudden

Tacky. Yuck.

He collects coins and used to be a scout so 🥴🤣

Brexit voter, bulldog tattoo and thinks there's too many foreigners here?

We had one but lived in the country. It was for the Welsh flag. Husbands idea of course 🙄

Clamped shut.

He is a bit of a royalist. But other than that, no. He says it’s something he’s always imagined since he was a child, after visiting the states and staying with a family that had a flag in their garden. But he only mentioned it to me a few years back!

Are there no covenants on your house preventing it? I thought a lot of new build places (redrow etc) prevented this and I had it in a covenant on my old house.

My dh wanted a flag pole. It has a Union Jack on it. It is in the front garden easily visible. I have no idea why it wanted one but is really chuffed with it. He doesnt lower it even day, it just flies. He lowered it when the Duke of Edinburgh and the queen died. He takes it completely down if its windy. He loves it. I'm happy because it makes him happy. I'm sure some of the neighbours think its naff but nobody would be rude enough to say it.

Quite the opposite! It’s not just me that finds it baffling then is it 🤣

f@cking knew it 🔮

say no, they make a horrible creaking & droning humming noise when it's windy & will keep you awake at night

A house near me has a flag pole and usually display a very large Jolly Roger which always makes me grin from ear to ear.
Occasionally they'll shove a union flag on special days which feels very appropriate.
If I do eventually buy my own home, a flag pole with Jolly Roger is the first improvement being made, that and a pink door.
Life is far too short to not do fun things. Buy the flag pole.

Wow, there are 2 of us. Thank you so much. I thought I was alone in this. My friends just find it hilarious.

Well if he puts an England flag up he will probably have a call from plod about his racist behaviour.
He does know that we are the only nation not allowed to show pride in our national flag doesn't he?

I hope so… 😁 I hadn’t even considered this… off to check!

Nothing wrong with having some pride in your country and flying the flag . I live in the US, not an American, and admire their spirit, they’re very proud of all sorts of things other nations would find cringe. But I think, good for them. Still haven’t installed my own flag pole yet.

Get one and fly a Jolly Roger from it

We have a flag pole as the husband wanted one. We are down a dirt track on an old farm with land. Nobody sees it and half the time it rips and looks tatty. He likes to fly the Yorkshire flag. The only useful thing it did was train my young horse to not be scared of flappy things. Half of it was flying round the stable yard!

FFS no. It's a complete sentence.

If you were dating him now, found him on a website and said to your friends...but he has a flagpole in his FRONT garden and it's the first one people see, even YOU would roll your eyes!!!

Ahh I kind of like them! There's a man on our estate who has one. Although he or it half may when his wife died 3 years ago and had never brought himself to putting it back up to normal again which has given his house quite a sad air.

There are a lot of confused English middle class people who say stuff like they like they make an area look too working class and that you'd shouldn't have national pride if you're from England specifically etc, but as long as your DH is the only man on the cul de sac with one, I'm sure neighbours pearls won't clutch too tightly.

Is he having a midlife crisis?

I think if he doesn't ask for much I'd allow it but it would be his responsibility to source the materials and labour and make it clear you won't be pulling it up and down every day for him, it'll be his responsibility.

For as long as I can remember, there was a house near the cockerel roundabout in Dorking that had a flagpole on the front of their house (first floor level) and as kids we would always look to see what flag they had up that day, we used to pass it on day trips to my grandparents.
Sad that when I recently went passed and looked and it’s no longer there. I particularly remember an Easter themed flag.