DH and his flag pole dream….

[Lilysienna1]

DH mentioned a few years ago, that he has ‘always wanted’ to have a flag on display in the front garden. A proper flag on a pole, that we would raise up every morning, and ‘fly at half mast’ when the occasion calls for it.

I have never ever even thought of having a flag. We are British and I know it’s quite common in America, but not so much here. DH isn’t a football fan, so it’s nothing to do with the flag flying we see during the World Cup and the like.

last year, for Christmas he said the only present he would wish for, was to have that flag. He was most disappointed with the watch and aftershave he received instead.

He has now mentioned it to 13 year old DD who thinks it’s ‘kinda cool’ and she could imagine using it behind her for tik tok dances.

So now, I’m being made out to be highly unreasonable and a bore, for saying I do not want to raise a bloody flag every morning and see it outside the front of my house every day. I did try to compromise by saying ‘maybe’ a small one in the back garden, but DH says it’s to go out the front only, and why should we be ashamed of patriotism.

We don’t live in a grand estate home, just a detached house in a redrow cul-de-sac. The neighbours wouldn’t be affected as there are large trees between our only neigbours drive and ours, and we are on the corner.

However, everyone that comes in and out our road will see it as it’s the first house.

what would you do?? Give in and say yes to DH and his flag pole or put your foot down? Am I really being that unreasonable and boring? Does anyone else fly a flag? 🤦🏻‍♀️

Your house would look like it belonged to a racist gammon. Outside of state occasions and national sport, the UK/English flag has been hijacked by the far right and if I see one flying outside a house I think Orange marches/football hooligans/Britain First, that kind of thing.

Lots where I live I did find it strange at first

What flag does he want to fly? I would assume he was a racist or nationalist if any of the UK flags. If you are flying a pirates flag or something fun then that's different.

Team flag here, all the way. It’s his house too - why would you not allow him to have a dream come true?
I don’t agree that you would look racist, particularly if the flags raised vary and include fun ones. There is one near here in a v posh area, they have different flags up at different times including the union Jack, Ukraine flag, festive, Jolly Roger. I don’t notice it much, but when I do, it makes me smile.
Stop being such a spoilsport. You’d want him to support your own pursuit of a harmless, fun hobby, wouldn’t you? If you’re worried about being judged, couldn’t you just laugh it off?

Can your neighbours definitely not see it at all?

I've declined to view houses if close neighbours are flag wavers... I make various assumptions depending on where and what flags are flying. At best, it looks awful.

Flagpole Planning Permission
If you are planning on buying a flagpole which will be installed permanently, you may need to apply for planning permission from your local council. Under 'The Town and Country Planning Act 1990' flagpoles are listed under the definition of advertisement.

They can also make a clank, clank, clank sound from the metal on the pulley things (technical term ) which my DH said he remembers from his childhood, living by the sea. Another one here with a DH who wanted a flagpole, but when we saw the price of anything half decent it somewhat dampened the enthusiasm.

there may be LA planning restrictions to consider can you bribe the Council to say he can't have one

It's kind of adorable.

Fuck the racists, take back the flag. Racists are scum, they don't deserve to be considered here.
Tommy Robinsons of the world shouldn't be ruining DHs flag dreams.
Fly your flag high, dh! Change it up occasionally so it's noted you're not footie hooligan/maga level flag shaggers and just a nice inclusive yet patriotic family.

There’s a couple in front gardens near me flying the Saltire (I’m in Central Scotland). I just think a/ each to their own, but b/ you are batshit, and c/ poor partner (cos it’s always the bloke that’s wants it!)

My concern would be about the assumptions made of your household if you get a flag. I am an Aussie and things are different here, I know. People with flagpoles tend to be right-wing racists making a statement without words here. The Southern Cross flag has been adopted by worse people too. (Ironic as the flwag came about during the Eureka Stockade when Gold Minera went on strike for better conditions - and a lot of them were Chinese fighting alongside the miners with UK genes. It was a symbol of union strength and now unions here are as strong as wet cardboard.)

I’d be so embarrassed by a flag on a pile in my front garden. I’d hate it.

The sight of a man holding ceremonies to raise and lower the flag would honestly make me never want to have sex with him again.

Is he expecting you and your DD to line up while he raises the flag.

Your neighbours WILL laugh at you. And potentially be quite pissed off.

I hope you’re lucky and there are restrictive covenants in your deeds that prevent this.

Can he not just build a model village and train set in your garage and raise a flag in the middle of his village green. He can line up the villagers to salute it.

Tbh, that wouldn’t necessarily prevent the death of sexual desire thing but it would mean it wasn’t on display to the world.

St George's Cross has this association (except during major shooting events e.g. Euros/ World Cup.

The Union Jack doesn't

My grandparents have a flag pole. My grandad had always said he would get one when all his children were married. We live in a village and I cant think of any others other than the village hall.

They live in a bungalow and I dont think it looks out of place but they do have tall hedge on the front

The Union Jack most definitely has ukip/brexity connotations.

But… contrary to what many of the ‘oh it’s just the English you aren’t allowed to be patriotic by flying flags’ crowd, many Scot’s would take just as dim a view of a neighbour flying a saltire on a pole on their front lawn.

The only Scottish people I know who would do that are a certain type of unthinking loyal to the SNP nationalist that doesn’t feel as different from the ukippers as either group would like to imagine.

5 pages in and not a single joke about viagra? Disappointing.

There's a chap here who has a flagpole it's in his garden in his end of terrace next to the road. He changes it based on various different things and has things like a jolly Roger, union flag, England flag, pride flag, Devon flag (were not in Devon but I assume he's a proud Devonian! Flags are definitely a thing in Cornwall and Devon, I assume it'd a passive aggressive statement about the right way to top a stone but I digress). He changes them for various events, political goings on, sporting events etc.

I don't think he's a football hooligan or right wing supporter. He has a green party flag for election time. He also had racing pigeons which just doesn't fit the football hooligan image.

When you let DH get his flagpole, please just make sure he flies the union flag the right way up. Its become an irrational annoyance of mine for no real reason!

I think the Jolly Roger flag lends that a certain quirkiness. Not the union flag though. We were once camping and a couple had a flag on a portable flagpole they erected with a coat of arms. Being nosy we asked what it was and it was just a coat of arms they’d had made. Perhaps get him one of those op.

I find it a but tacky ... and it's a bit "colonialist", that's what British people used to do, go and stick their flag up in other people's countries ....

Aww let him have it. It’s quite common near us so far this week we have a chap who is flying the Scotland flag - clearly supporting them in the six nations, a Jolly Roger & a smiley face - opposing perspectives over the same playhouse, a Union Jack and a we ❤️NHS flag that is sometimes swapped for a Yorkshire rose.

I started this thread thinking "Hell no. How tacky"

I've now read all the responses and changed my mind. DH sounds like a good guy and it's his dream. It's his home too. Why do you get to veto his long held dream for his home?

I vote get it. Ignore it. Let him enjoy it.

This may - or may not, be helpful OP.

https://www.gov.uk/government/publications/flying-flags-a-plain-english-guide/flying-flags-a-plain-english-guide

Another vote for the Jolly Roger ☠️

Well that’s just what we do isn’t it - the first thing the USA did when they got to the moon was stick a flag in it

We have a flagpole. It's a bit of fun. Get him one!

I live by the South coast & flag poles are common here, I assume due to sailing connections. As per PPs, they can be very noisy due to wind rattling the cables, but I love driving around my local area & seeing whi property has which flag up (most change theirs on a regular basis, perhaps to stop said flag getting tatty). I personally think it's a bit of fun! 🇬🇧🇨🇮

Tell him the proven relationship between flag poles and the size of penises….the larger the pole the smaller the penis ( also applies to cars)