Really Annoyed This Morning ...

[MrsToriCostner]

Sorry guys, I just really need a rant!

SAHM here, two kids, almost 7, almost 2.

Got up this morning, came down, kitchen a mess from me cooking last night.

Presumed DH would have sorted it or at least filled the dishwasher and turned it on last night.

I do DHs packed lunch for work and shout up and ask him to bring any glasses/pots from upstairs meanwhile I've told DC1 to get dressed for school numerous times but they are not listening and still in pjs watching tv.

I go upstairs to get ready for the school run and find glasses/pots in DC1 bedroom, DH has taken the flat sheet off our bed and dumped it on the floor and left it there because DC2 leaked in the night apparently. His socks are dumped on the floor too, it's the same every morning, I find myself putting them in the wash basket myself.

DC1 is still not dressed and apparently can't find any socks despite multiple pairs been in the wardrobe.

So I'm shouting loud by now as we are going to be late and I'm taking 2 kids on the school run.

I don't know why I'm writing this, I just feel I could fall out with the world today 🙁

Is he blind? That is the only reason I can think of as to why she would have needed to ‘ask/remind/tell him’ to do something that blatantly needs doing in a house that they both live in.

Definitely telly off at whatever time you want them to go up just go in and pull the plug and turn Wi-Fi off. Tbh I don't see the point of him doing his own washing it will just mean more electric and washing powder because you can guarantee he will do one thing at a time . Get him to do his lunches the night before and put it in the fridge. It will be fine, and Get into the habit of sorting out the dishes the night before as well, no arguments whoever cooks the other does the dishes end of. If one of the kids has been ill in the night they don't need loads of cups or glasses in their rooms they are too young at the moment to carry things up so you as parents are responsible so keep a laundry basket and perhaps a tray on the landing to put things in to even a small child can do that.

@IpsyUpsyDaisyDoos please get a grip. I did not make any grand statements about all of mankind. Maybe you are so defensive because you're trying to prove something (to yourself more than anyone)?

I'd have to agree.

@DropDeadFreida I have nothing to prove. I'm simply giving my thoughts. You, however, are extremely judgemental and unable to understand that you don't have the full picture of anyone's situation, and therefore may be judging too harshly too quickly.

Maybe you're the one who needs to get a grip. Or maybe just learn to think before you speak.

Hey, I’m sorry to hear that you had such a hard struggle this morning… Have you considered that your children are not allowed to watch any tablets/iPhone/television in the morning before they go to school?

That would probably help them in their concentration levels. And if they need to goof off, they can play in their room and then tell them at next time you’re gonna call them down and expect them to bring their clothes to get dressed.

Now that is only if you meant that your seven-year-old was on tablet/TV… The two-year-old. I can imagine they’re still still not going to school :-)

There should be no pot/dishes/silverware upstairs at all… It’s either in the kitchen or in the dining room.

Time to set some really hard fucking boundaries with the family

@IpsyUpsyDaisyDoos well I appear to have touched a nerve so I'll leave it there.

Do you genuinely never take a glass of water up to bed or enjoy a cup of tea/coffee up there in the morning?

When i was working pt after maternity leave I did say to dh the days I'm off, just leave the housework and I'll do it. Think this is fair, yes I will pick up the mess from a weekend when I'm off on Monday and blitz the house, then my next day off Tuesday do the shopping and run errands for my elderly parent and another family member who needs help. The rest of the week when I'm working I expect equal share, which we do with DC and house stuff. Xx

We make our own packed lunches but if I was a sahm I wouldn't mind really but my DH would still make his own. X

@innerdesign You're confusing SAHM with skivvy. Don't feel bad, a lot of people make the same mistake.

lol. Read the whole thread!

Sounds normal to me in a busy household. Why ‘pots’ in inverted commas? 🤷‍♀️

I did read the whole thread…I found your comment I quoted unhelpful and nasty, comparing what you can do. So I quoted it…and responded to it. Because it is not a competition.

No tv until ready to leave, hide the remote if you have to. Call a family meeting, discuss what went wrong this morning, and introduce the new rule.

Leave dhs stuff where he drops it, he can clear it.

Let him do his own lunch.

Why would you be 'very surprised'? Are you normally so easily startled?

You are adults. Sort it out. Your kids don’t need to be going to school stressed after hearing you rowing about pots and who should be doing the washing up. I’ve worked in a school - trust me, kids are sensitive and are taking it all in and are taking it to heart. Not a good start to their day of learning.

You and your husband need to sit down and sort things out. He needs to take responsibility. He’s not your 3rd child.

Parent your kids - no child needs to be looking at the tv in the morning. I’d be more sympathetic if you said they were reading a book, or learning spellings. TV? No

Every time he leaves his dirty socks/clothing on the floor - kick it into a corner or under the bed. He’ll soon wonder why he hasn’t clean socks/clothing. If he asks, just say -“I’ve washed everything in the washing basket - whatever do you mean”?
🥰🤞. When my 2dc were little the WiFi was switched off - no tv before school … it was hard enough getting them and myself ready - without DS standing around naked with one sock on staring at the tv 🤣🤣🤣

Exactly. It’s all about the mental load. You’re not his mum. He lives there too and should look at the mess and say to himself that needs sorting before I go up … and do it.

It’s ‘dishes’ in the north east. ‘Pots’ in the north west.. We’re just very idiosyncratic in the edgy north..

Return of the penis beaker

You are having a bad day.
So change how you do things.
If its not in wash basket don't wash it.
Don't ask for dirty plates & cups etc, if they are not brought to you do not clean them.
DH can make own lunch they are not your child.
Stop shouting, try speaking quieter so then they have to make an effort to listen.
Lay out clothes the night before make life easier.
No tv in morning until the kids are ready.
Tell DH if you make meal he does dishes.

Don’t need to tidy up before school run. Just leave it.
Don't make your DH lunch unless it can be done when kids at school.
No Tv until dressed, that’s only focus.
Once kids at school come home and get washing machine on, dishwasher on.