A pet peeve: Having your photo taken when you'd rather not!

[BeenThere0]

Am I in the minority finding it quite uncomfortable that photographing people - and then publishing the photos on social media - has become so casual? I've nearly lost a couple of friends over my insistence that no photos of me are to be taken to be published on social media. A lot of people who ask for permission (to take a photo of you) these days (e.g. in a hobby group or friendship group) seem upset when someone says: no, please. Please share your thoughts, thanks.

Being unreasonable: There is an implicit expectation in a hobby group, for example, that everybody is happy to have their photo taken and put on social media.
NOT being unreasonable: No to the above statement.

Sorry to hear that, @2ndMrsdeWinter .

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@BeenThere0
I was probably just a bit tired yesterday, I have voted now!

And I do agree with you. One should ask before putting someone's photo on social media. And accept when someone says no.

I don't like photos taken of me. Possibly related to the fact that as a child my mother would take photos then laugh at me and say how fat i was. (I wasn't actually looking back. But after the eating disorders then yes I was). Even now she will take a photo of me surreptitiously and laugh at how I am a hobbit, or got my father's fat genes. I find photos being taken of me genuinely traumatising.

But that said- I used to work in child protection and having photos shared randomly of some of our clients and / or their mothers could be very genuinely dangerous for them. A picture of a child in the background of a facebook post put out by the local paper led to the family being moved in an emergency to another LA.

I find the opposite annoying. Taking photos then not sharing them.

I don't mind being in the videos or photos shared on instagram etc from my classes. It happens all the time. However we are given the option and you don't always want to participate, and sometimes I will step out if someone is brandishing a camera/phone.

If people are identifiable (I.e. not blurred in the background, turned away from camera or obscured by something), it’s only reasonable to ask if they’re happy to have it shared and abide by their decision without judgement. Some people have very valid reasons for not wanting photos published.

I totally agree, OP. I hate having my photo taken and just flat out refuse. We come back from a holiday with many, many photos and not a single person on any of them 😂 I don't know why people think they have the right to insist on taking my picture.

I hate it too it's very intrusive . I told someone not to the other day. We'd just sat down for coffee and she shoves her phone in my face . No thanks . I don't live my life through Facebook

I hate people sharing photos of me. I'm not photogenic at all and I don't like being in photos and try to avoid it if at all possible. If someone's going to stick photos of me on social media I would rather be asked first. I think that's just basic courtesy

That’s just rude. Just don’t take it. People have reasons and it’s not for you to judge.

I’ve got a couple of friends who do this all the time. I hate it. I’m not photogenic and I don’t particularly want everyone to know what I have been doing or who I am hanging out with. I do untag myself on facebook but it’s harder to ask someone to take pictures down but I have done it.

I don't like my photo taken unless I feel good. But there is a special place in hell for people that post unflattering pictures of other people.

Thanks for the reply, @YogiYogiBear . I hope you still ask the person photographed whether they are happy with the photo being taken and shared (or even just taken). Like other posters have said, the person may have very good reasons for not wanting that.
Furthermore, I hope people don't press the person to reveal those reasons. They can be too sensitive.

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I just tell them I don't want to be in the photo. I hate folk who publish photos with other folk's kids in them, often on their public instagram or FB accounts.

If you don't want to be photographed fine, but don't get into the photo and then ban anyone from putting it on FB. The others are happy to be on FB so it's selfish to do that!

I think that in English and Welsh law anyone can photograph you in a public place and publish it.

Yes, there's no excuse for not sharing in some way with electronic photos. Or people who say you don't need to take photos because they will and then they don't share them.

It might be a group photo though so one person who's very sensitive shouldn't spoil that for everyone else.
Good for you Janet.

Then they can step out, it’s not rocket science.

Not wanting to be photographed doesn't make someone automatically 'sensitive'.

I think you need to find new groups if they behave like that when they ask you if you don't want to be in a photo. My groups do this too and there's no judgement if someone doesn't want to be in the picture.

Yes, I agree, they can step out of the photo.
What they want though is for the photo to be taken, but not be put on FB, which is selfish. In one case, a person wouldn't allow photos to be shared at all.

Then why pose for a group photo?

What's the issue then? Assuming you're an adult talking part in a legal activity?