Found out man am dating was previously arrested

[wishingyouwell]

He told me he was arrested due to false allegation of violence from ex partner. Said was released without charge. No way of finding out other side of story.
Would you continue relationship and hope for best or pull out? Early in relationship.

https://www.gov.uk/government/publications/domestic-abuse-bill-2020-factsheets/domestic-violence-disclosure-scheme-factsheet#:~:text=The%20Domestic%20Violence%20Disclosure%20Scheme,previous%20abusive%20or%20violent%20offending.

You can seek a Claire’s law disclosure which will inform of any concerning information OP?

He said it was her in fact who was violent due to an addiction and he was trying to get her off him (self defence)

Check him out, Clare’s law will tell you if you should be concerned, especially important if you have children,

He’s coming out with all the classic lines imo. There’s absolutely no way I would continue this relationship.

Highly sceptical. 'False allegation' indeed.

I would run a mile. Please consider a Clare’s Law application if you decide to keep on seeing him.

Statistically I think it’s more likely that he was violent to his ex than the other way round so I’d probably just give it a swerve at this point, as it’s such early days anyway.

Shall I fire the starting pistol, or are you wise enough to start running NOW?

Yep, I would be out of there.

Having been there myself and being told his "last relationship got violent" I requested a Claire's Law. Sadly it was too late as a week or so later he attacked me.

I took it all the way and he was convicted of ABH
He's telling you who he is. Run.

Why did he bring it up? What was the context?

No charges brought just means there was insufficient evidence. My ex is still claiming false allegations. Going to trial later this year.

Thank you all. I made enquiries about Clare's law but was told there was a possibility police would contact and interview his ex partner. This seemed really odd to me as in this case the ex would tell him and he would know it was me. If he is in fact violent wouldn't that put me or anyone in my position at risk?!

Run. Sounds like a classic

Oh, his crazy abusive ex accused him of violence but it was really her all along?

Has anyone got the bingo sheet? There's several to cross off there!

Convenient way for him to get his story in first if anyone says 'you're seeing Jim smith? Didn't he get arrested for DV?'

I'd chuck this one back.

I made enquiries about Clare's law but was told there was a possibility police would contact and interview his ex partner

Who said that?

It's always a false allegation.

My ex husband had a false allegation, psycho ex blah blah blah.

Now I'm the one who made false allegations, and is the psycho ex.

I wouldn't trust any guy who says this, ever. At worst he's an abuser, at best he has an ex who will go to any lengths to destroy his life, and I wouldn't want to get embroiled in either situation.

Mine wasn't convicted (until he attacked me and got him done) but there was still a record of all the police call outs that had happened. They wouldn't put an ex girlfriend at risk by asking her.

Run away fast. Don't look back.

I agree with pp clares law is a good bet.
I would however run a mile from this one as its a classic abusers tactic to denigrate their ex's and claim victim hood status when the fact is that they (the abusers) are not victims.

Even in the unlikely event that his story is true, sounds like his recent past is chaotic. Run run run.

Under the circumstances even if the police contacted the ex, why the hell would she tell him? And tbh if he did get nasty about you asking for a Clare's Law disclosure then that tells you all you need to know. It's nothing you'd need to be ashamed of.

I wouldn't believe false allegations, he just hasn't been charged due to evidence doesn't mean hes innocent. Wouldn't bother with the hassle of Claire's law, you are just dating, drop him.

If he was falsely accused then it probably would be on his record right? So why would he feel the need to disclose this information?

Unless there is something on his record and he’s covering his back for when you do actually find out? That’s how I would be seeing this, he’s trying to get you to see it from his point of view immediately to cover himself for when you inevitably find out.