Page 10 | For letting 18 year old son lay on my lap

Katemax82 · 2024-02-01T07:26:18+00:00

Last night I was on the sofa with my 5 year old ds, he was tired and was dozing off. My 18 year old ds was the other side of me and put a blanket under his head and laid it on my lap (he wasn't feeling well for context). He husband walked in and said "your too old for that" to my ds. He claims its "fucking weird" for an 18 year old to lay his head on his mums lap. He is autistic and felt ill. Is he right?

MrsSkylerWhite · 03/02/2024 11:32

Yep, your husband’s an idiot. Please tell him so.

Walking2024now33days · 03/02/2024 11:34

Katemax82 · 01/02/2024 07:41

This is exactly what I think

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Good.

DH is a twat

AsIseeit · 03/02/2024 11:47

Caerulea · 01/02/2024 07:46

That's just sad. 16yo DS still does cuddles & often when I'm feeling low he'll give me them.

Unfortunately it's that thing where your other half sees physical affection as purely sexual & that's kinda gross.

Yes. Exactly this. Husband sounds rather unpleasant.

Ottersmith · 03/02/2024 12:09

Did you stand up for your son and tell your husband never to say shit like that again?

LadyGl1tch · 03/02/2024 13:10

No it's not "fucking weird" he's fucking weird.
I'm a 27 year old girl and I still love a cuddle off my mum and dad. They're your babies and the fact they still feel comfortable to come to you and get some love when their poorly shows you're a great mumma. The last time I put my head on my mums lap I was around 25, I was sad and she played with my hair and it took me right back to being a kid and I felt so comforted.

You're a great mum, your husband is weird!

Original poster

Katemax82 · 03/02/2024 13:24

Ottersmith · 03/02/2024 12:09

Did you stand up for your son and tell your husband never to say shit like that again?

of course

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Original poster

Katemax82 · 03/02/2024 13:25

Ginandjuice57884 · 02/02/2024 16:41

Is your husband homophobic and/or misogynistic? Because that's where my head goes. Being a "mummy's boy" or being cuddly/affectionate is often seen as effeminate, possibly gay, and therefore "bad" in some way. Although maybe your husband has his own unique reasons for his weird opinion.

unfortuneately yes

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Original poster

Katemax82 · 03/02/2024 13:27

DonnaBanana · 03/02/2024 09:55

He claims its "fucking weird" for an 18 year old to lay his head on his mums lap. He is autistic

If your husband is autistic I would cut him a little slack for not finding the right words in this situation

no my husband isnt autistic, my son is

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willWillSmithsmith · 03/02/2024 13:33

ManhattanNY · 03/02/2024 08:49

My son is nearly 19 and always does this. He puts cushions from the sofa on my lap and then lays on them. I have to tickle his arm or his head through his hair. My husband calls him a soft-head, but affectionately. My son does not have ASD or anything like that, sometimes he just needs a cuddle from mum.

My son, also 19 is exactly the same. I think posters on here who don’t ‘get’ it either don’t have kids or don’t have a close relationship with them.

Sillybert · 03/02/2024 14:02

willWillSmithsmith · 03/02/2024 13:33

My son, also 19 is exactly the same. I think posters on here who don’t ‘get’ it either don’t have kids or don’t have a close relationship with them.

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I’m feel quite sad for people who see this as weird, it’s one of those treasured moments that they will miss out on.

ATVL96 · 03/02/2024 14:12

I'm 28 and yes while I'm female I still lay my head on my mums lap when I go round wirh my own children and she still plays with my hair. No matter your age you still feel like a child compared to your parents.

It's actually your husband thats the weirdo for even thinking this about the situation.

UsualChaos · 03/02/2024 19:40

My 19 yr old ds does this too when we're watching tv. Absolutely nothing wrong with it whatsoever. Your husband is projecting some weird shit that he should keep to himself, quite frankly.

GenevièveSapha · 03/02/2024 22:30

Children are never too old for L❤️VE.....

Vinnieparty · 04/02/2024 01:36

Hi I'm 25 and autistic, my mother passed when I was 20 but if she were still here I'd still cuddle her when Id visit- as I used to do all my life before she passed away, same with my grandmother, they would hold me and rub my back when I wasn't feel well or was overwhelmed , it would make me feel better, and was really the only thing that could make me feel better
There's no age cap on receiving parental affection, especially for autistic people, your h sounds like a jerk,
Coming from an autistic child, parental comfort means the world, at any age, you are the only consistent thing in their life, don't let your husband make your son ashamed of seeking comfort. Wish yall the best.

Solocup · 04/02/2024 02:05

It’s perfectly normal.
Your husband sounds like an arsehole.

ArseInTheCoOpWindow · 04/02/2024 10:22

Vinnieparty · 04/02/2024 01:36

Hi I'm 25 and autistic, my mother passed when I was 20 but if she were still here I'd still cuddle her when Id visit- as I used to do all my life before she passed away, same with my grandmother, they would hold me and rub my back when I wasn't feel well or was overwhelmed , it would make me feel better, and was really the only thing that could make me feel better
There's no age cap on receiving parental affection, especially for autistic people, your h sounds like a jerk,
Coming from an autistic child, parental comfort means the world, at any age, you are the only consistent thing in their life, don't let your husband make your son ashamed of seeking comfort. Wish yall the best.

💔

My Dd 17 is ASD. I’m her first port of call and safe person. I’m the only person that she doesn’t feel the need to rehearse what she’s going to say.

I’m sorry your dm isn’t here anymore, but she gave you safety and regulation when she was.

Zanatdy · 04/02/2024 10:23

Your husband is an idiot

Conniebygaslight · 16/07/2024 09:27

Jeez, our big strapping 23 year old DS would still do this to me and/or DH. They never stop needing their parents. To make it sexual is weird. I’d be so cross OP.